Tonight
I stood in front of the mirror
Bottle in hand
The world as blurry as my feelings.
Someone please help me

drag my helpless body down the hallway
where it is dark and hidden from everyone,
a place too eerie that ghosts yearn to dwell and linger
—my purpose is quite the same after all.

compelled to conceal myself in the shadows,
sublimating to an unnoticeable presence
like speck of dust upon a quaint furniture
that no matter how meticulous and kind
the hands that care for me,
i cannot be wiped clean.

a miniscule of being that i am
only has a slight chance to be found.
to be known.

Something died in me today
When tears started falling down
By themselves
Something died in me today
When my soul started screaming for help
Something died in me today
And I will never be the same again

Tonight
my heart is full of ache

I am slow to learn
and quick to mistake

All the progress
that I manage to make
One grave error
and it all seems fake

Years are running out
and much is at stake

Tonight
my heart is full of ache

And as I stand
Alone
In the dead of night
I will whisper
The immortal words
“I love you”
And hope a shooting star
Catches them on its way by
And brings them
To you.

I can distract myself
Long enough
To forget how much I love you
Until it’s 2 AM
And my restless thoughts
Echo your name.

As I stand,
Staring out at the edge of forever,
Death approaches
Welcoming me home
With open arms
To a bed of eternal ease
And weightlessness.
All that’s left to do
Is let go

The moon whispers stories of the stars
And I tell him tales of you,
The boy who stole my heart
And parted the clouds
To see the sun.

As I look at you
I fall in love with all of the things
I feared about my future
And for the first time,
I fell in love with the idea
Of getting there.