When I was little my mother was always near
I did as I was told no questions asked
Until the age of twelve when everything was clear
I began to quesiton the things I was tasked
Caring less and less if mother was around
Acting reckless keeping my feelings masked
My friends and I would terrorize the town
Giving no regards to others and acting like fools
It was five years before the old me was found
I found relief in music so it became my tool
The stress of my parents was too much to take
I wanted to give up on everything including school
I rarely asked for much and made my own cake
But I was sick and tired of not having freedom
So I signed my life away for some rank
When I graduated I left for a few seasons
The confidence I gained was what I'd needed
Although my absence was for no clear reason
As my eyes open wide my mind becomes heated
Everybody is ignorant whether they agree or not
I have new standards for how I need to be treated
I promise I've been through more I've been through alot
Treat me with resepct and understanding when I speak
Being right sometimes doesnt add value to your thoughts
Thinking a lot means not that I overthink
Listening not to me but others is destructive
I know from experience not from a link
I'm not a child anymore that little boy is rusted
I'm a grown man that has his own views
But I still make mistakes on who should be trusted
If the effort is mainly on one side who has to choose
When nobody wants to make up I have to grown upwards
Because my sidekick Watson surely doenst get the clues
Yet I'm still competing against myself for no rewards
The effort I put in doesnt reciprocate
So I get edgy because I have a goal I'm working towards
Every conversation feels like a new debate
My relations are irrelivent and you don't listen
You aren't honest most often being fake
No being mad you're never wrong in your vision
Of course those rules never apply to me
Tu eres el hefe and thats your mission
The point is that I've matured in ways you wont see
I grow weary of your demands and lack of understanding
and I still find myself wanting to be free
What goes up must come down and I'm landing
I hope I maintain my composure and retain sanity
My last one took that from me without my planning
In the process I was filled with vanity
I pray you're not the same resulting in a tragedy
I’m sorry my love
But it has to be done
The clouds have moved in
I’m no longer your sun
My heart is aching
At the thought of what was
My will is breaking
I’ve just had enough
I hope you are happy with me around
Tonight can see you're not
Your voice sounds tired and low
Feel like a ghost you forgot
Know you are growing irritated
Put me down sometimes for no reason
Act like I am just being crazy
Your cold shoulder and this winter season
In front of friends we share
You should be sensitive
I am trying to be reasonable
I am weak-my soft spots are quick to forgive
Want to be as fun and carefree as you
Isn't as easy as you make it look
Under your smile I sense something else
What will bring back joy that I took?
You say I make you happy but I know I don't make you happy like I used to
Another day goes by where I ask myself why I continue to live this miserable life
i can still smell the pungent air of
my old shoes on your two feet
and see the boulder on your
shoulder—hence the welcoming,
never mind my silence, see those
bottles you sent knocking me into
a soldier in a warzone, fighting for
my sealed freedom.
i am breathing fine and well within
the confines of my room walls and
warm blankets, and i will not beg
anew a soft, suede-covered
i yearn a bow—a salute
to the space now.
i've had enough unwanted attention, case closed.
Anger brings out a side of people
Perhaps one that hasn’t been seen
But then again it’s useful
It makes the slate start clean
I have a motto now
I’ll live each day for me
I’m done trying to satisfy the thirsty man
And portraying what he wants me to be
Let’s be honest I should’ve seen this coming
After all he wasn’t mine
But God it shouldn’t of hurt like this
And I shouldn’t be silently crying
I'm at my limit
Struggling to keep it
I can't speak loud
Somebody, help me out.
Help me, please?
I just want peace...
I can't afford to loose,
Please, do not abuse.
I hear it whisper...
Luring me to unleash her
Her words are so sweet,
But I must stay on my feet.
Don't force her out!!
Or, I'll black out...
It will be messy...
I'm afraid, help me.
my life with hyperacusis...