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Eleanor Sinclair Dec 2020
The ringing seems endless like the ocean’s infinite blue
I think it’s trying to say something
Can you hear it too

It seems the words are English, a dialect I once knew
I have wondered what it wants from me
The voice sounds just like you

So I see it is not a thing but now instead a who
It follows me wherever I go
Can you hear it too

Now it wants something that only I can help it to do
Escape the wicked mortal confines
The voice sounds just like you

Suddenly the air felt thinner all while my body flew
It told me that I should end my life
Can you hear it too
The voice sounds just like you
Eleanor Sinclair Dec 2020
I wrestle with these thoughts of doubt
And all the hate I can’t get out
While you sit there and watch me in my pain

Imagine that this hurt will pass
That death for me is swift and fast
Forever in your heart you’ll feel the rain

I want to stay for me and you
But I’ll do what I want to do
This world has extinguished my bright flame
Read this to the best of Duality by Slipknot, it works great.
Eleanor Sinclair Nov 2020
I knew when I saw you it would be like time hadn't moved
After a few moments we got back into our usual groove
And the scent of you lingered for the seconds I hugged you
I felt happy to be there and maybe you knew

I playfully motioned for you to hold my hand so you did
You probably didn't notice the smile I hid
The tv flickered with a game in the background or music
All while we leaned closer and in an instant felt lucid

We embraced again before the night was done
You walked me out and said you had fun
One more hug this time with a tighter squeeze
In a way it felt infinite and like time could just freeze
I nestled my face in your neck and you did the same
I'm sure you felt my heart race and still you stayed tame
I slowly let go of our entangled goodbyes
Then did my best to avoid your eyes

How long had it been since I felt those butterflies within
With him, it was truly a romance to get lost in
Eleanor Sinclair Oct 2020
There was a time when we were happy together
The stresses of life were nothing more than the weather
And every smile on our faces brought us pleasure

But there are times in life when the wind becomes fast
And the sunshine turns to rain so the warmth doesn’t last

There is a split in the cloud, where the sun breaks through
That little bit of sunshine is when I see you
Without my sunbeam, what will I do?
Eleanor Sinclair Oct 2020
My heart skips a beat every time I see your face
I wonder if you can hear it, as it jumps in place
My chest gets tight and my blood starts to race

I saw you walking down the street
As quickly as I could I picked up my feet
I wanted to catch up, but knew to retreat

There are words I hear and things I say
That remind me of you every single day
You helped my life turn to color from gray

Every message I receive on my phone
I hope and I pray that it is you alone
To feel that joy I had once known

I miss you more with every passing moment
You will always be my friend, never my opponent
But we will never be together and I know it
Eleanor Sinclair Oct 2020
It’s amazing the way that we bleed
The way the skin parts and the blood starts to bead
It’s a rush you feel through the skin
Like a tingling sensation without and within
Or a touch of rapture inside
Like the soul is escaping through a crimson tide
Believe it or not, it’s freeing
Until the moment you just stop bleeding...
Eleanor Sinclair Oct 2020
In my dreams it all feels real
You hug me and it seems so clear
Then I wake and you’re not with me
Through the tears, I can barely see

But I’ve come to terms with this reality
No matter if I want you badly
I’m content with only getting you while I sleep
I look forward each day to my nights of counting sheep

Our fake bliss begets pain in my heart
And with the opening of eyelids our moments depart
I wonder if we’ll ever be together
But in my dreams, we will be forever
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