My own growth comes from a deep realization of loss of life, whether its at my own hands or by another, I’m skewed emotional & left questioning my own intellect, I live until it’s time to go & continue to be proud or apologetic for my own extreme nature.
I have found nothing but happiness in the time that I have been away. In the garden of orchids I learnt to scream in color painting pictures in vivid technicolor.
I learnt to laugh with my tongue sticking out much like this orchid, I wasn't always this happy but now... I have found a wave of calm like no other.
I no longer get mad thinking about you instead when your name visits the corners of my mind. I open that tiny door and mellow in the memory thinking Wow that once made me happy but that once led me to the ocean weeping my sorrows away
Today I think of you with roses in mind except now I removed the thorns, pruned the bush and smelt the sweet fragrance of joy.
P. S I hope you're as happy as I am and if not I hope you find the kind of joy that makes your toes tingle and your face brighter. I hope you learn to laugh again. I always loved that laugh.
I've been gone for years but I'm not back for long I just needed to show you that I've since found it, joy.
When you call a **** poem victim-y. Victim-y is the person who makes Excuses for why they treat people like An *******. "I had a hard life, so I'm an ***." Using excuses for bad behavior.
A woman writing about How she felt about her body After she is ***** is not Victim-y. It is fact. Not a woman alive who's been ***** Will ever say she's not affected. That she hasn't gone home After. Looked in the mirror At the body she's had her whole life. And felt utter shame Less than who she was before. Like the good pieces of her Were ripped away with his touch. Victim-y is excuse. Talking about your loss, As a women. That is utter strength, And those who can't see that. Maybe you're the one playing Victim.
Someone called a **** poem victim-y. Telling her to get over it and stop writing about it.