I'm scared you'll run away If I tell you what is wrong
You can not promise you will stay
There's a pattern and I'm starting to catch on
You see, you'll act like you care
Everyone always does
But when you are needed you won't ever be there
So I turn to my drinks to feel that familiar buzz.

Being unwanted isn't new to me. Infact I was shocked to find myself on the verge of tears when I found out you don't want nor care about me. I hate what you do to me. I hate that you're my weakness and you don't give a ****. I hate that nothing I do fazes you. I hate you.

I always play tough,
That's how I have to be,
I can't give these mfs the satisfaction from when they played with me,

My mama always told me,
To never let them see that side of you,
Don't let them get to you,
They'll  abuse you and use you,
And
They'll walk away,
Knowingly bruising you,
It always take that one time,
*Don't let it be two...

I'm drowning yet I stand in no water,
civilization is the curse of my existence
it weights upon every aspect of me.
Do this, don't do that, I am man I am free.

But they do not listen for greed is upon fake
prophets that only think of what they can
accumulate before the reaper kisses there soul
and all that is left is regrets and nothing more.

"Spin the wheel your fate is there's to play,

Be one with the world, live life, don't do as
your told freedom is your chosen choice.
We are now like hen pecking in out squalid
corner, when really we shouldn't be drowning

With tears in your eyes, you begged me to stay.
I said "I love you girl, but no ******* way."
For months and months, I've been hoping you'd see.
That the way that you are is just killing me.
It might **** me to leave you, I might **** myself.
But even taking my life is better than being left on  your shelf.

My points aren’t touching ground.
Plucked up by a spine
Holding my pages together
When the library is going up in smoke
Paper doesn’t need to breathe
It just needs to be the channel
The background of the universe
Bleeding itself into reality

Don't hold on to anything. Nothing is where we all begin and where are we all will end. Everything in between is just a continuation of the unknown process that we all exist within.

Love means nothing, age is everything, we are dirt and dinosaurs. Absence is a relevant. Feelings are meaningless. Do everything, do nothing, no matter the outcome, nothing matters. We are matter.

Fly high, until you reach the stars or until your wax melts and your wings burn. The Sun'll burn us all away in time.

Don't hold on to anything, just let go and fall or float because we are all in the void.

You want to see a smile on my face
Wait a minute while I get my paste



Oh **** that
This is where I'm at

I really believed in you,
But I found out that was a big mistake too.
For all the promises that you have failed to keep,
I pretend that you love me,
So I can get some sleep.
I held on to you so tight,
When we were together,
Everything felt so right.

You were once the one who kept me sane,
Now you’re the one who is causing me all this pain.

The memories all come flashing back,
I wish I knew then, who was hiding behind that mask.

For all the promises you have failed to keep,
I find it hard, not to lose myself esteem.

My heart can’t take anymore lies,
Or soul crushing goodbyes.
I can’t take anymore flesh cutting tears,
Or four more wasted years.
For all the promises you have failed to keep,
I delete every memory of you , so I can get some sleep.