could you reflect
upon the past
with shadowed walls
and broken glass?

could you see me
inside those shards
from pieces of bone
and shattered hearts?

could you feel
the aching pains
the moans and wails
inside your brain?

could you know
how i had felt
as walls tore down
and lies would melt?

could you see
the hurt you caused
with your blank face
and all your flaws?

could you tell
you crossed every line?

could you?

He told me
He would never hurt
He would never lie
He would never leave

He told me
He would always trust
He would always give
He would always help

That's what he told me.

But he made me cry
He made me hurt
I had to lie
I had to leave

I gave too much trust
I gave too much of anything
I helped too much

He used me.

I was his mirror
His reflection
His vision of himself
That
Was his view of me

That was probably his view of anyone.

But it was him.

This hand that I waved you at, was the hand that our hands were once held.

I’m gonna light your
Reputation on fire,
And leave you to rot.

I don't want love for the wrong reasons
Just to get over you
I want to have a different taste of the champagne that love could pour me
I want to get drunk in love that I only say her name and not yours
I want to make new memories and  let go of ones we had
I don't want to fail her like I did with you
I want to make her the happiest girl in this world
So please get out of my head
For the space in my heart that once belonged to you is now filled with her and there no turning back

you did nothing wrong
you are amazing
i just don’t want to be
in a relationship right now

i was the common denominator

fool me once - shame on you
fool me twice - shame on me
get broken up with for the same reason
four times - it’s a ******* pattern

how do I explain to someone new
that I am running out of pieces
of myself to give away

that i’ve stopped saving phone numbers in my phone until somebody proves
that they’re going to stay

that I don’t even know how to talk about myself
because the things that
make me - me
were the reasons
why everyone else left

that i haven’t figured out
what I’m doing wrong
and my track record
makes me not want to try

how do you tell someone new...
that you already know
they aren’t going to stay

you arrived just as i was about to give up

with you, from the start, everything was different.

to say i fell was an understatement
dropping down far beyond all the previous hurt
a level i always knew existed
but never quite knew how to get there

but now, here i am - and the door is cracked open
when i peak through everything seems cloudy

i can see all of the ways this can go wrong
i can see all of the ways this can go right

I'm Terrified.
That one day you'll wake up
and want someone else

But i need you to know that as scared as i am to get hurt.
I'm All In.
You Have My Entire Heart.
The Good.
The Bad.
The Stressed.
The Anxiety.
I Want It All.

To put it simply,
to you I will always be true
because, Darling, I think I am
falling in love
with you

we drive in your car, me in the passenger seat
talking about your new boyfriend and how kind he is
playing songs that i don't like
i can't drive but i watch the roads with you
your hand on the steering wheel
your hand so close i can feel a current run through us
different from before-not as warm or electric

in my dreams this was different

but it's nice to no longer be enamoured by you
to not think about the stupid things i would do
things that would leave me red faced
things that i would think about before i went to sleep
spinning in my head like an unwound tape
gruesome and divine

i know that i am over you
when i can feel the scabs from where cupid struck
no longer hurting but still there
i am healed but i still like you
you are kind and funny and everything else

but I am no longer drunk on the toxins of your love

we could be friends, i think
as you pull up outside my house
i get out and smile
this was nice
is love dead? will i ever love again?
my thoughts shift like sand
but i am just glad that this tape will never play again
and i will never hear the music