Nothing hurts when I'm alone,
As I drink the sweet poison
That empties my mind.

How unkind,
This substance can feel
So fresh and fine,
Without a thought to mind.
As I run for fun,
Through streets of unknown,
Not knowing who the ones are
Vibrating my phone,
As they text and call me
To come back home.

A smile creeps on my face,
As i'm restless and dazed,
In a hypnotic haze,
For one can only suffer
The very next day.

But alas,
The day has come,
And I for one
Awoken by a
Frosted memory,
Of one late night,
Turned into a horror sight.

Was I there?

As I meekly glare
At the ones who care,
Standing before me,
Beginning to stare.

I hear silence in the air.

Not one feeling I remember,
Not one feeling I forget.
I wake up in a cold sweat
Of utter guilt and regret.

Tonight
I stood in front of the mirror
Bottle in hand
The world as blurry as my feelings.
Someone please help me

the dog night salivates and commands
                                     and commands
but i am abroad from that
  asleep with my family
  under the open windows
as others stew in the clubs, bars
     and packed terraces

Drinks, drinks and more drinks down my throat
To feel some sort of nausea like I’ve been rocking on a boat
Just for the moment of absolute alcoholic rejoice
To dance, jump and yell out every bit of your voice
To be like some sort of euphoric paradise
The pain of it faded away is for later to realize

leisure up my friend !
   weaken open your shellfish hinge
       and wet your beak
it’s a marked holiday break
   unmarred by family obligation
there’s freedom
   to make the most criminal crown of mistakes
   in the name
         of some frown of liberal investigation

on the town
an eager squad of collaborators are on board
     they have your back
desperate, sick and starving gulls
     broadened to explore the deplorable
on and on to the next and the next
     death defining task

a meandering stagger of a bar crawl
  perpetually   powering through
     as the day spans a revulsion
the heat stays as the day sinks beneath
in place of the suns rays
the heat radiates
        from the baked city concrete
  
stepping out from the shelter of the bar
  the night swelter respires fiercely
not done with our steam of annihilation
  what establishment would take our kind ?
city has already bowed over it's plumage
                                 to our ******* pilgrimage
bark melts and peels in strips off the trees
        (meat shaved off the strip pole)
our heels spark the pavement
vermin and jackals follow our movement
             from shimmering dark spots
             and our vision constricts

our aim   has become clotted...
      ...what was it that we reached for ?
oblivions fruit seemed a doable pursuit

it's the usual downhill shambles from here
familiar yet barely remembered
a rambling guff of bad ***** comedy
there is no plucky legend
just an embarrassment

99 bottles of her on the wall
99 bottles of her
drank one down
trying to drown
98 memories of her all around

Liquid sand can create liquid despair
Aching
That distilled poison seeps through
Tainting
Stinging my skin when you touch
Burning
My eyes swell, disappointment or fear
Hurting