Stuck like a fly, I'm paralyzed by choices
Everything needs to get done
But like Ouroboros, eating his own tail
The tasks are a circle with every place to start requiring a different task to be done
It's a sisyphean struggle to get started on most things
Yet words are my escape
I share my dreams with others
As their stories flow into me
My consciousness recedes
Rarely enough to have complete silence
But even whispers are a relief
From the thunderous yells
"You're just lazy!" and "You'll never amount to anything."
Those words and more echo through my mind
Every second of every minute of every day.
Wistful "if only"'s of impossible scenarios
Are my constant refrain
All efforts I make turn to ash and dust
Just taking the next step, the next breath is a fight
It's feels like it's me against the world
And that weight is heavier than I can hold
Sometimes, the darkest days give the most inspiration, while others choke the will to survive. And little by little its grip tightens, it won't get me today.
