One day
     Or one night
You wake up in the middle of your life...
      and say...
      What’s wrong?
         Why are you crying?
            What are you missing?
Do you want to go back to sleep?

            No!

                 I want to live more!
                 I want to Love more!
                 I want to cry more...
                 I want to hug more...

Just Hug...
            and hug... and more...

Just for one day...
            or one night..
I want to stay awake...
           I want to be alive...

———•———
PS. ... but it’s  f**g  2 am...
...OK... but stay awake during the day... even when you go back to work in a cubicle...
               Do I have to? Yes...

Like tremulous waves of copper, the sun rises on your face
In the early morning peace
The birds, awakening, sing veraciously to one another, enveloped
In the ambivalence of the falling colors
Blue, yellow, orange, red, and black, all mesh together
In an embossed dew on your cheek
As you part your lips,
Inhaling the fresh taste of the morning air

Belied, you exhale,
Breathing

Knowing.

I lie awake with the moon, pouring my secrets to the ceiling,
Sinking in my own mind, drowning in my own thoughts.
I think my soul is missing.

One day, you wake up and start to see everything through another sight.
You see that we all are the same stupids human beings as everyone on this planet. Everyone is gray, everyone search only attention. That attention is necessary to keep alive their Ego. Egoistic and individualistic creature, that what is a human.
They need to be "the only one" in anything, but they're just another one doing nothing new, only hungry of "likes" and selling their self for nothing more than something that doesn't exists.
We are bored, we are sad, we are unsatisfied, we are...

Sorry, about....

how much  I
completely come--   a l l
              over myself;
the ceiling,  the window-blinds..  

the neighbor's cat..
walking  across the street

every single night, my love.
(true story)

Lines and lines, druggy times.
Bleeding nostrils and racing thoughts.
Fast heart beats and feeling distraught.
Alert and awake, thoughts are chasing me in a maze.
I've lost it, I'm back on the powder.

They call me Kat, because my spirit animal is one of a cat like creature, and my drug of choice.
Fierce, sneaky, stealthy, and mischievous.
Kat is my name, one of many different personalities.
Freaky is her demeanor.

Wired and full of energy, mind is coming down, muscle spasms are happening.
I need to sleep, 2 in the morning and I'm writing forbidden thoughts.
Dreams that are nightmares that aren't stopping, I have no hold.

Will it ever stop?
Control before it becomes an addiction.
Hold, or the demons will rain, toxic tears to my waking existence.

No sleep 'til I'm dreaming
let exhaustion try and take my consciousness

I don't want to be awake anymore
but shutting my eyes is a waste of time

My bed is a wasteland of waking nightmares
and the air is hot in October

I thought tears could take me
but the last try I cried myself to activity

Melatonin is a hoax I hold no hope for
and **** is a drug that gets me ****** up

Even this isn't helping
maybe it can help you

I'm driving home
like everyday
trapped in the traffic.
All is gray.
All is okay.
It rains.
I don't feel
cold or warm.
I just see what happens.

I feel like I wanna drown in the acid those bones hurt inside.
There's something I can't explain, just confusion, behind the eyes.
There are things you can only talk with yourself.
They won't understand,
they don't know.

Listen to the sound of nature.
It's calling out your grave,
that's the existence.
Around me I see
you're all falling,
you're all lost.

A voice in the head calling me,
it's screaming help and crying deep.
The sound of fists on the wall of my mind.
Someone is punching hard from the inside

Shut up!
I need silence to sleep.

Those rain drops on the glass
remind me you're all passing by.
Their weak colors are like your lifes:
confused and obfuscated.

...and now i'm home,
but what is home?
I don't know what is true.
I can't wake up,
would I ever wake up?

It's time to stop thinking

Let Sleep

vibrancy emits amongst the echoes of the night
as slumber casts itself on most these hours, absent light
while some lack productivity, with efforts turned to ruin
my product of activities proves grand by starry lumen
ideas are born, regrets are mourned, and midnight snacks consumed
to moonlit ante meridiem: my fondness, ever true.