For much of my life, I found myself overextended, giving in to requests and demands that left me drained and resentful. My energy was siphoned away by others, leaving me little time or space to tend to my own needs. In the pursuit of approval, or perhaps the avoidance of confrontation, I became a servant to the expectations of those around me. Yet, I realized that this servitude was not born out of obligation, but from my own inability to say “no” — a simple word, yet one that carries profound weight.

Learning to say “no” is, at its core, an act of self-preservation. It is not a rejection of others, but a reclamation of my time and energy. It is a statement of my boundaries, a way of asserting that my needs, desires, and well-being are just as valid as those of the people who ask for my help. The first step was recognizing that I am not responsible for meeting every expectation placed upon me. In fact, every time I said “yes” out of guilt or fear, I was betraying my own priorities, eroding my own autonomy.

The key to refusing others lies not in bluntness, but in clarity and conviction. To decline with grace, I needed to acknowledge that I am entitled to protect my time. By doing so, I discovered that I can offer more to the world when I am not constantly exhausted or overwhelmed. In reclaiming my ability to say “no,” I opened up a reservoir of energy that could be redirected toward the things and people that matter most to me. It was not selfishness, but rather a conscious decision to steward my own resources wisely.

I also learned that guilt has no rightful place in this equation. The discomfort that arises from setting boundaries is temporary, and it pales in comparison to the long-term depletion caused by over-commitment. Others may not always understand, but their approval is not what defines my worth. There is immense power in standing firm, in recognizing that I cannot be everything to everyone. Saying “no” is an act of integrity; to myself, and in turn, to those who truly depend on me.

By understanding the limits of my own capacity and cultivating the courage to enforce those limits, I now live with greater intention. Every “no” is a door that I close so that I may focus on the doors that truly lead to the life I want to create.

–

If you could hear the music once more,
Would you take my hand to the dance floor?
Would we recall each step we knew,
Or falter on the path we never grew?

Would I grasp at the chance,
To share with you this last dance?

I shouldn’t.
I couldn’t.
I won’t.

For this last dance belongs to a heart worthy of my embrace.

— Sincerely, Boris

Angel's of better through
Myself, to a fascinating yarn
Of what went where, a since of owe...
That collect a share in more, to earn

Callous decision begins the day...
When is a legend of promises and due count?
Of a shadow in the grand scheme of things, say
The utmost of tries and tribulation, within a certainty's pout

Credence to verify a care, the toil of just
The riddance of guarantee, to account a new play
Oft the light of simplicity, but complex in sides of must
That have harrowed a call, a cause of means in altruism's way

Stepping forward, in the name of a treatise vaunted
We spy the court of prodigious example, for a nefarious ghost
My time here, is a walking and silent myth, a risk haunted
For the gain of truer heed, in a wish there is patience for most?

Could a faring wealth of passions decree, be?
Here is the solace of worth I will know, a caring hardiness
Made shall, a redemption to a tow and show of order, to lead
The audacity of a hand of fortune, to the rise of charisma I bless...

With that, the treasure is many and magnificent
Couth in final compare, in the spare and presiding
A wish of summation and its thought to drive, a share meant
With the lips of dignity, that shall continue without airs of denial

At role and delve of omnipotent trust
The tooth of the day, is to hope, is a forth and will of kind?
Long looks and summations hope, is a silence to discuss
Letting ours begin here, with purpose beyond fear, is mercy to mind?

Most individuals aim for speculative wealth,
these linear channels are paralleled in others
when taught to gain a greater sense of self.
If we continue to grow grouped as a collective,
are the surroundings around you yours alone.
Priorities are often lost in the process of reformation claimed through phased stages and good fortune is drawn in multiple forms.
Step aside for an instant to question contempt and observe at your own mixed objectives,
foreseen in the dreams of who you want to be.
Not visions of anarchy or set enforced orders but a better balance of autonomy in between.

I don't want to be   p u l l e d
in  to  your  world..

My hope is to  become  able
to lift you out of  your world
    until you find your  
                   true,  own..

  Instead of the one  you
  have  fallen  in to

I feel like I have to steal myself from you

but it doesn't even matter
because you make me believe that
that's all I need

stolen pieces you've given 'permission' for me to steal

like I don't still have me






an impossibility
a dream


does it even matter
I will always have me
does it even matter

It's all about the choices
You're in a tornado of voices
And still the power is yours:
Feel free and simply choose.

and in the 12th my teacher grade tenderly grabbed my wrist
and said
what is this
and
I said
me
But
that was the wrong answer
he wanted me to say
my —-wrist
he wanted me to say my
MINE

He wanted me to take ownership
of my body
he wanted to acknowledge
Or
He wanted me to acknowledge
that I was
An inside
of a body
And
Not a body
He wanted
Me to think what I just
“mistakenly”
called “me” was just a vessel
To hold “me”
That is it was lent to me and would return
from whence it came
that I was barely or merely or some other kind of “erely” visiting
and
that me and mine were different when it came to body

Such a kindness and autono-motive restoration to remind a person that they are
More
That they are not their looks
or their actions
Or even potential ambulation
I know what he offered me was a kindness

I declined
I said no in my own way
If you’re wondering
What I said was “you are what you eat”

I still don’t know what I meant
If I meant

and I’ll ozymandius myself
If I claim to be more than this

I am crumbling, but I will stand tall on these broken feet

As soon as I can fix my posture

D Vanlandingham

Boundless..

In its ability to extend beyond all forms of containment;
the big circle contains within it, the little one
And if it is true relationship through genuine volition of the beloved
that is to be desired most of all,
then spirit, wrapped in flesh is the autonomy most needed
     in order for the dream to become true.
Spirit is being.
Spirit cloaked in flesh is being--
feeling its relationship with its own self.
Spirit, mastering its own flesh by reigning in  its emotions  along
with the synaptic-firing of every one of its nerve endings into full
submission of the spirit's own core nature, is the root-basis of all true volition.

Spirit, in its raw form is perfect-- wholly unable to undergo
corruption, or decay..
     but the flesh..
     the flesh,
     Always needing to substantiate itself through its never-ending layers
     of self-promotion  apart from the realities of its own spirit's  core.

Yet,  pure Love--
wholly unable to see itself as that which is to be rejected,
enters in to the very act of the rejection, itself;

..that autonomy may  continue to  contain
the uncorrupted core--
     and the smaller circle becomes established:
     smaller.. yes.. but in truth,
     its parameters self stretch all the way out
     to those of the bigger one

And so, with the necessary advent of autonomy
into the relational equation,    comes also
The necessary advent of God's wholly-volitional
self-depletion of God.. entering,  in to it all
so that, in time, God(Love) alone  might take the full brunt
of rejection's unjust hit--
     in its autonomous movement  away
     from its own incorruptible core..
     away,  from its own true self.

So, follow the smaller circle, if you will, my beautiful--
either way, you are still following God.

I stood up and left the fire that burnt my touch,
though as night falls I grow to miss its warmth.

I decided to give you back

I know now



I thrive with those who see
where I begin