Sailing the guilty-seas
as regret trickles down my spine
and unloads
its over-thought-husky-murky-thoughts
upon my shoulders.

My daily rations are here:
shame, regret and guilt.
They’re brewing me to the bone;
into a rotten broth.

My thoughts pace
backwards and forwards
from guilt —
for remaining stagnant,
one of the past.

For being recycled
relentlessly-unbreakably
in this unhealthy cycle.

It is a cycle
of forget me nots;
such vile fetters.

But no dose can
reverse the abused time,
the stutters-and-mutters
the time that slipped my grips
and the sins
that swallowed my innocence whole.

For remorse, guilt and shame
only anchor us back
unless we were to morph them
to fuel and experience
to propel us forward.

like an anchor you kept me safe between the ocean waves
like and anchor you held me steady so I wouldn't drift away
like an anchor you chained me down
like an anchor you let me drown

              l.t.

you seem like a complete stranger
when i find you at your most vulnerable
it's like i'm looking through eyes
dark, vast, unending,
that everything that's far behind your eyelids
seems so distant

when you're at your worst
and i'm struggling to find
the sense of familiarity;
my footsteps become cautious
every movement becomes uneasy
i would hold you with shaking hands

but i wouldn't mind
i would be here
and keep you close
and tell you to breathe
and offer myself to be your anchor
feel my heart against yours,

for even the stars themselves collapse sometimes.

You’re standing on my head
My face is flush
And wet
I’m sinking further into the cement
Until there’s nothing left

....