My worth is not seen by the harrowing nature of my own eyes
I have seen too many lives pass before me
They are wilted
Jilted by an unrequited dream
Lives that are my own because I always place myself inside your heart
If I could take the next bus home it would be toward that time when
I was 10
I hugged my Papa so tight because he was at my birthday party
That would both be the sad and happy time for me
Only to experience great loss and great gain and great forgetfulness
The fear of neglect is so close to my heart
That when I feel any sort of bird born in my cages
It is also a trap to set it free
There is a song sung before it flies away:

"Premature maturity
The never ending running man
In one place is a rot on my mind
Until it dies of nothing
Because my body is where ideas come to grow and die and bear fruit
My body is where I am alive for the new roots to plant itself in my skull
To listen to the whisper of the woman in my ear
She says she is my mother
There is nothing to fear"

But why Mama did you leave us?
To grow in a place where nobody knows us
To belong in a world where you are rejected
Your children feeling nothing but loneliness

The back of my head is haunted by a man looking over my shoulder
He sees everything I have searched for
I find nothing
But he finds me without fail
He knows everything

That man inside this cage of mine
His nose is broken, his grin is crooked like a hunger inside him is restless
There is a dark pit I cannot find
If I find it I might just get lost in thought
Pondering on an idea I can't quite remember
My mind treads unto idea upon idea
Until the stores have closed
It's nothing short of a shame
I don't mind your sorries
I only mind the explanations

If you could only find me my father again

help,
i’m lost on the way back home again.
everybody knows,
our love is six feet under.
it’s a hostage love,
forced and closed off.
we are a secret that no one knows.
i’m breaking at the seams,
lost and confused,
abandoned by you.
but it’s not your fault.
its mine for falling so **** hard

she left me
ran away with another man
she said goodbye
and I did protest
I don't know what I did
but I loved  her with my best
god, it hurts

Nevermore will the sun set on the day.
Dreamy blue skies smile, unveil and show mans dreams.
As your wafty blond hair lay woven between my fingers.

Sweetest god gifted to me, temptation.
I trust in the you that watches me.
Golden gates, your smile greets the world.

Knife edges, wounds and scars disappear.
The me that watches you is lost in those eyes.
Lay across the ground. Stare up into those broken dreams.

As the ground falls away, let me catch you heart and soul.
Nevermore to drown alone.
God kisses your sullen cheek, as the you that watches weeps.
Love, could I ever really compete? To the you who watches.
I will smile through each hardship, just so you can too.