if i shall die today

i will have lived a thousand lifetimes of happy bliss

contained within that single passing moment 

of unspoken, unending, beauty.

that moment 

when our eyes first met 

across that ocean of blurred lights and faces 

and i stood there

with my naked soul

heart like a humming bird

suspended in time.

that moment 

when everything fell into place

and simultaneously all fell away

and i stood there

lost in the reality 

of your breathtaking existence.

was i at all born before that day

that moment, that face
that brought life to theses bones

breath to these lungs

words to this paper

and reason to this old and weary soul.

yes if i shall die today

i will have lived a thousand times more 

then any one who has ever died before

for i have danced in your grace 

long enough to know, to not fear fate.

You wanna know what it's like to love?
When you feel so lost in time and every second that's passing feels so unreal?
You wanna know what it's like to feel like choking on tears at 3 in the morning?
When time refuses to pass and every second feels like a ticking atomic bomb?
You wanna know what it feels like to be ripped off your sanity?
You wanna know what it feels like to have *** for the first time?
You wanna know what it feels like to try so hard and fail?
You wanna know what it feels like to fall out of love and experience the kind of sadness you never thought you'd feel?
You wanna know what it feels like to be kissed in every spot that drives you insane?
You wanna know what it feels like to have someone talk about you behind your back?
You wanna know what it feels like to smile like nothing has happened?
You wanna know what it feels like to get wasted on your birthday?
You wanna know what it feels like to have cigarette smoke filling your airways?


Then you **** right feel it.
Then you **** right experience it.
Then you **** right give yourself a chance.

By the time you're 20,
No one gives a **** if you're a ******,
No one gives a **** if you were the top student in '09
No one gives a **** if you were so drunk you couldn't remember your own name
No one gives a **** if you were so choked by cigarette smoke you thought you were suffocating to death
No one gives a **** if you almost rammed into a tree on your 16th birthday
And sure as hell,
No one gives a **** because let me tell you this.


It is your **** life,
*So you **** right do whatever the hell you want to do.

Stars shine tonight
To reflect the beams in your eyes
Wind blows nice and easy
Just as if taking a breath
While we kissed
Goodnight to you
And I'm sorry we
Can't change anything.

You make the bee stings and the mosquito itches feel like it’s not such a big deal.
You make the coldest days and hottest nights so much more opposite.
With you, It feels where I’m suppose to be. I don’t have to act like anything but myself around you.
I don’t have to care if my hair is a lions mayne. I don’t have to care if my nail polish isn’t dry.
I love you like this; speechless it is.
You nearly take my breath away.
I would do anything for you.
I would wait at the top of a mountain and haul the sun to bring you comfort.
I’d sit on the moon just to watch you from every angle.
You make me feel like I don’t have a voice and all I can do is look at you.
Look at how your smile makes everyone stop forever and just smile back like I do.
You know me better than I know myself. Sometimes with you I forget who I am because I know what I want to become and that’s yours forever.
You will never understand how much your love has taken a toll on me.
I love you and won’t change the feeling for any kind of attention.

It's been 2 months
Since we parted
But we've been
Together for 2 years
It's probably warm
Where you are
But I'm still here
Recovering from
The coldness of
Your words
It's so hard to
Wait for closure
From someone like you
But you're worth it
So I'll wait.

He holds my hand with gratitude and heroism and warms them with the truth of his breath.
You let go of my hand and left me holding onto your cold heart.
He smiles like it's time to spread the warm sheets out on the cold mattress and hopping into bed feeling at ease.
Your smile was agony and ecstasy in which I always wanted to see, but killed me the times I did.
He kisses soft sweet kisses and when I open my eyes to look at this sunlit face, I see nothing but simplicity and contentment.
Your kisses were angelic and broken for they were never promised and never a surprise, but something so soreal.
Yet he doesn't have my heart yet because you haven't given it back.
And to tell you the truth, I'm still waiting and I'd still wait.