When You ask me how I am,
I just wanted to reply That I hate you

I hate you for making me feel that there is more in the world than lost feelings

For making me believe that broken heart can be healed when you don’t even know how to let me in

She might have the same way to walk but she get closer to you and you know she will never touch you like I do.

She might have the same kind of deep voice but her words will never resonate as mine in your heart.

She might have the same eyes she will never understand you like I do.

Enjoy having the same, while I am still somewhere around.

Be happy that same same is always different <3

I never be really a huge fan of love
I prefer to be tough
Or maybe all those romantic movies does not have that much influence on me
And then you pop up into my life I was kind of looking for you but not ready for it

There is still protection and walls and million of gates to cross to my heart

But now I know I am not an helpless soul

That is not to say I will run to you that is just to say I am happy you give me this and I won’t forget it ever

Now the question is still the same should I stay or should I go most of the time I decide to go... only the future can show us the answer

Until the future come please live, laugh, love

The time might come or not we will always have somewhere in our heart, this feeling of unconditional impossible love

It’s not their job to like me, it’s mine.

What a better place than Bali to fall in love?
More I know myself less ******* I tolerate

Many people believe they know
Most think they are lost forever
The most important would be not to judge, no to question so much

How could we still listen to those haters
When they are the one that are mainly lost

This voice in my head most of the time if **** up
But at least I always know where she is and who she is

I am at this turn in my life where choices are important. The only thing I need to remind myself is to not settle for less than I deserve.

The day I choosed to just stop looking and keep stable all of you pop up in my life, it’s just a small Hello what’s up but for me it’s destiny telling me *** are you sure ?

Feeling like hercule when he has to pass all those obstacles and finished anyway to hurt himself.

Can just someone come and tell me what’s best ? That would scare most of people that would relax me with life I would follow : just tell me what’s best I will put my mind there and don’t ask for anything else but tell me or show me something !!!!

Stop sending my past show me the future

I am in the restaurant
My friend just left the table
And here I feel all complete

I enjoy being with her
But her leaving remind me how much
I love to be by myself

I guess that’s what we call self love
I spent the all day stress
Now just being alone
Remind me that the smallest thing in life are the one I enjoy the most

Sharing a meal with myself
Watching people around
I never feel alone by myself
This is supposed to make me afraid
Afraid that I loose my social part but I don’t think I do

It’s noisy I am surrounded by people
It’s just me and my beer and I few complete
I guess that’s what we call self love

"There is no destiny, nothing to save.
I don't know how to receive love
It makes me feel uncomfortable
Before I think I was for but
I emptied a gun loader into my foot"

The older i get to more i see the world is not perfect
And also realized that it's not that bad

I start to appreciate the bad in the good
and the good in the bad

Heaven always get a little ***** where i live

I can see it from the way they look at me
Some questioning why I don’t walk the line
Most don't even care about the person that I might be
Is is not kinda crazy ?
Living in a world where everyone has something to say about everybody.
While not many really work on who they are?!
I never been afraid to be different but always to be the same than everyone,
Should we not worry more about loving ourselves rather than loving the idea of people loving us?
Self-love is not selfish is the way toward love
I know when the time will be right everything will fall into place and I am ready to work hard for it.
Until then let’s share love!
Mind, Body, Spirit

i want want a simple life
With nice people
A world where eveyone love each other where eveything is real
Where love is not a goal but a way of life
Where I can walk bare foot and smile to eveyone without looking weird
I want to party until morning
Wake up and start again just to meet all those amazing people

Can someone tell me where is this place ?

I think I will never forget

The way you manipulate me like I was one of you game

You cry when I left and you smile when I got hurt

You knew so much how to hurt me

And I protect myself so much not to let you do it but it continues to run in my veines: this voice telling me it hurts first because it felt so good back then

It should last long because I am supposed not to beleive it

And I stay and you go

And I think and you forget

I wanted you to forget me so much so I could think about you evyday knowing that you will push me away

But tonight I just want to hug

"They say soulmate is a perfect eternal lover that fate brings into your life, is irreplaceable. You can find your soul in our universe even if your light years away and in another lifeform. Every soul has a soulmate that offers powerful love energy, it's an equal exchange."

Then if it's so obvious, can someone just come to me and tell me" hey it's me" no need to worry anymore, not pressure, no society feeling nothing. Just easy and eternal unconditional love.

Anyway, if it was that easy peole would have already make business out of it. But i beleive in miracles, so I will wait.

Do we need to fall in love madly ?

I am always questioning love and the couple as it has been sold to me.
And as weird as it seems : it’s totally not one of my goals.

How can I trust the world and the idea of love if I don’t even see what’s being a couple means.
I heard it’s holding hands at the sunset, laughing until sunrise and drinking to get blind.
This who sounds beautiful for most of the people sounds painful for me.

The sun rise every morning in a different way and set every evening with different colors it looks beautiful but what if it’s jsut the look what if the red colors are the symbol of fire, of anger, of unhappy feelings ?

I saw so many of those “couples” and they always seems not to get enough.
I want magic, no lies, only laugh, no battle, no drama ... apparently it’s too much to ask.
I would like someone to hold my hands traveling the world, raising kids who can understand that seeing the positive way of life is always the best option. Is there anyone in this world who just want to go that way ?

Until then I am here, I am waiting, I know you find me.

I have only one philosophy
Be accepted as I am.

Break up always hurt,
They always hurt even if you know it’s for the best for both it always hurts

You make so much effort to fit with someone else personally. I don’t mean to fit - it’s not really what I want to say but some how to learn about each other and becoming better are being together.

And finally as always one get distant by cheating or just by using words that will hurt

I always build my relashionships on trust and I always get hurt but what I have to remember it that somehow I push this I always do I know it’s my decision I know I influence it somehow because I knew it was better for us

And all his speech about being angry even at the word cheating, at the end he is the one using it the best.

Anyway everyone make mistake, and everyone deserve to be happy.

I won’t get hurt I will get it to get free.

They also always tell you they love you what is love if you can’t make the sacrifice for other like you do for yourself.

I don’t believe in it I think words have been invented to cheat better on people that *** will ever do.

Don’t tell me I am so perfect if it’s her your choose when your drunk night comes.

Will be now a year, a year I put on paper everyday my feeling

All those feeling make me think that I should always go when I just want to stay

And once again I want to escape to go far, will someone ever know how to hold my hand and tell me how not to go?

If he is too perfect I go, too loving, too addicted, too boring, too far, too old, too young I always leave afraid that love could take me.

"what you want exist, don't settle until you get it"

I am not afraid to target the moon.
More I try better chance I have to get to the stars.
Even if it takes time I beleive in it, again and again.
Keep trying

Angry or sad I don't know anymore
I do things to my mind and to my body like i am angry at myself

But all i want is to take care of myself, be on my own.

I don't want to have *** or even fall in love i just want to feel all wrapped in their arms like I am not alone anymore.

I was thinking it won't hurt but it does. I was thinking that maybe being angry at you will help but i can't manage to be angry at you only at her.

Angry or sad I don't know anymore

I am happy when I feel angry, I am full of energy when I cry, I am feeling it all when I am disappointed.

All those year not wanted to feel teach me how to twist and fake emotions. I could make you happy when I was down. I could make you angry just because you did not know yet but you will hurt me so I could push you away before letting you touch me.

I don’t want it anymore I will be a ball full of emotions any of them I will let them come in.

Make me angry, sad, cry, love, smile, drink I want to feel. I want to feel so badly

I am listening to love songs
And I don’t feel sad
Like I finally realized that it’s a beautiful thing the world has to offer
I was never ready for it
I always push it away to protect myself from pain
And I realized that I always finished to get attach and somehow fall in love and finally get hurt.

I don’t want to refused the good feeling anymore. I will just keep in mine at the end it will always hurt and that will be enough protection.

The "..." in your messages make me relax,
Because i know that more you think, better you are at calming our fights.
But sometimes i need to scream, sometimes just sometimes.
But i love it so much when you calm me down, i always wait for you to do so.
I am just afraid one day you push me away and the "..." i love so much during our fight will turn from I love it to I don't want to talk to you.

I would rather regret the things I have done rather than the one I have not done.

In few years the things we would remember are the crazy one we have done, the one for which we makes our heart beat and our hands sweat.

Quit your job, fall in love, take the next plane, join me, leave me, be happy, cry, make mistakes, live, laugh, travel.  

Do what you like and don’t regret anything.

I feel like a teanager again
Full of hope,
Smile on my pocket ready to be shown as soon as needed
Going on a trip like it's my first holidays
Seeing my future ahead
Feeling like my first love
Today I feel like a teanager, first love, first holidays without parents, freedom and happiness like I just found the purpose of life.
I love this feeling so much, being happy, feeling my heart bumping and so exiting for anything coming.

I am tired of falling in love
I sick of covering up
Seems that for staying safe I should change and become something that’s not me
But I was always taught to be myself
I am my own independence, the reason I am smiling in the morning
Who I am need to be enough
—
We can do anything, just run away with me
Put your hands into mine and let’s be each other everything
Give me your heart I promise I won’t break it
—
I want to sing and dance and feel beautiful

What should I do now
I know this would happen

And finally it did
I don’t feel lost
I am just afraid to loose myself
This self I love so much

I don’t want anyone telling me I am not good enough, strong enoug, beautiful enough

So let’s make decision

I won’t let anyone putting me down for any reason
I will be mindful on what I say but never stop sharing what I think

I am not single I am good with myself
Is not because you are single that you should please anyone around
Keep you life your character you envy of living your power of words

Quantity is nothing compared to quality
I prefer to wait for the good than waiting my time and being destroyed by the wrong ones

Love it up
Never give up
FLY first love yourself

Why everybody always think they know me? Like they are mediums, as they know what I think or want or have been through... but I only show what I want them to see.

No you don’t know me! No one does. And i would not be saying neither that I do know you.
—-
Eveytime I am nice it’s not me hiding my emotions it’s me dealing with the devil in you.

What should I do ? Insult you and telling you I am hurt and that I hate you for what you did to me ?

This is not the person I want to be or Even is. You don’t know me!

If I react well when you rejected me it’s because at least your have been sincere and respectful and I respect that enough not to get angry or even sad.

If I get angry or sad who that will help: you surely to see that your actions have effect on other: but you alredy know that when you did. You knew it will hurt me anyway.

If you did it you have your reasons and I respect it!

Now that my heart is free
I actually feel much more better toward you
And I think I would have to thank you to open my eyes and my heart to the greatest gift humans can get : LOVE.

You show me it was possible, even if I believe that you always lied, your lies stayed in me like something I have to follow.

It’s weird how I hated you so much for putting those felling into me and now that I am free of any relationship I think you did good.

I believe that two souls never meet for nothing, there is always a reason. I now found why I met you. I was thinking it was a bad experience but I now think that it was needed.

This is what you told me the first night we met,
And now i am wondering, if egoist and love go together.

I am listening to this song
And as soon as the first note ring
I am thinking of you
I have look for love all my life
And here we go with this impossible love that feel so right
I don’t even feel stuck
You said you would wait years for my return while I just wanted to stay
I become to believe in all those stupid things and yet I never let you bring me on a date
Oh **** I miss you and I don’t even know how to control it because I never get through this before
You have haunted me all my life

The real truth is that I am scared to be alone that’s why I don’t leave you. But I am also scared to be with the wrong person and that’s why I dont want to be with you.

I crossed oceans, rode the highest mountain,  fished Piranhas, fought with a crocodile and I am not able to succeed any challenges in my love life ... really ? That’s so stupid

Love is too challenging, can I surrender ?

I am here wind in my hair,
Sunglasses on it’s cold but I just need affection to warm me up, to put a smile on my face.

I am here watching the kit on the beach a blanket on my legs, their is no 3G I am away from the online world.

I am hear smiling at an old guy who just get out of the water he was enjoying the waves...

As simple as it could be...I am here and it’s enough

Why do I always ask myself so many questions?
Most of the time I don't even want to know the answer or even better I know there is no answer yet. So why do I keep torturing my mind with those questions?

Why not living for the moments and let things happen the way thet should happen. Let it go and just enjoy the moments.

Mind please stop questioning everything, I can't answer it all anyway. Lets make things happen and beleive its all right, alright?

I don’t know what I miss,
—-
I have been taught;
By the TV that I should be a princess,
By my mum that I should look like a princess and fight like a soldier.
But I am definitely not a princess :
- I eat like a dinosaur
- I walk like an elephant
- I talk loader than anyone
- I dress like a ninja
- I sing like a drunk teenager
- I prefer my drunk walk than the cat walk
—-
It’s supposed to be like in a film this is what I miss: the unconditional love that I see on screen or maybe I just miss you...
—-
I never know what I miss

You say things and you never respect them,
You say you have money but you have to sold your computer to get out of ****,
You say you decided to be nice with people and you fight with them,
You say you don't like when people leave but you make them,
You say you don't have many friends and there is always a new one around the corner,
So don't say you love me because it does not make any difference,

I say i don't share feeling and I don't,
I say i have a BF and i do,
I say i am afraid and never sure of anything and I am,
So trust me, when i say I don't want to talk anymore, I mean it !


At least for now.

I never know how to walk away because i am always afraid i won't find something that special again.

What if all love songs should be sing for ourselves? What is the real love is being in love with yourself and all the rest is just a plus.

I am tired of those stories that never work. Of those feelings that always hurts, of those peole that always lie of this society that is always wrong.

I am just going to listen at those happy love song thinking they are written for me. Like my soul and my head are 2 different persons and protect and love each other forever. Because at the end the only person who will stay forever will be me. At the end the only person I want to keep up with is me.

I promise I would keep myself happy because no-one is responsible more for my happiness.

I want to stay when I should go
I want stability, I need adventure
I need love, I want freedom
I am everything but perfect, I love who I became
I am night and day, black and white, happy and sad.
I feel drunk even sober

I am perfectly fine by myself, I rarely need someone to tell me what to do, who to be, what to want.
P
A
R
A
D
O
X
When I am all alone, I need someone to tell me that I am amazing and deserve it all.
*
I hate lies but in those moment I just need a lier
P
A
R
A
D
O
X
My happiness can’t be linked with anyone, I need to become my own lier.

Maybe I should stay alone
I always knew that I won’t be good at love
I hurt myself more than I ever hurt other
Alone or not it keeps hurting
Deep down I just know I am stilll not saved even if I try to hide this scare everyday it always comes back every 3 years like if every 3 years I remember what happened 3 years before those 3 years before those ones

3 is then my breaking number

But it kind of always get better when I break the circle

Is love something we build or something we feel?
Which love is stronger the one we feel at first or the one we decide to work for?
What if ...

**** I hate those feelings

Saying the opposite of what I think
Feeling the contrary of what I should
Keeping smiling to hide everything

My dreams are my only escape  
There I can do what I want
See who I like
Explain all I need
And feel it all

And yet I can’t sleep,
How can I dream if I can’t close my eyes,
How to find what I need if the only place I know your are is in the darkness of my nights?

If i am not all you need
Why don't you let me go ?

There is nothing left to say
I will be fine!
Every little lie
I am letting go
I open my eyes

---
There is nothing left to say
(When i want to scream about this mess)
I will be fine!
(Pretending that I am alright)
Every little lie
(Impossible to hide)
I am letting go
(Anyway you are already gone)
I open my eyes
(Even if my heart is closed)
---

You could just fix it with words
(Don't want to hear your voice)

Why are you running away from me all the time?
Because i can no longer be held responsible for my actions when I am with you.

Why do we live ? Why do we die ? Scream ? Cry ?
—-
I don’t want to be a robot : metro, work, sleep.
I never had my foot on earth I want to be a bird.
—-
There is like a bitter taste, like a taste of dust in everything and the anger that follow us.
There are silence that tells everything, more than the word that we say.
And all those questions that don’t have any sense
Surely, we still dance on the song we liked but not the same way. And we still laugh like kids but not like before.

I don’t love him, I know I do love him.
He is my best option, I want to go to the other way.
Right now I would take a plane to the other side of the world and fall in love again
But I can’t
Those days I don’t understand anything about myself I hate the society and the respect all his rules anyway how can I be so ...
I just wish that falling in love was not that painfull so I could so it again

It’s 3 in the morning
I can’t sleep
I have everything I want,
I am lying in a new bed
Have this awsome job
Nevertheless I cry
I feel alone in this big room
I talk all day as I love
I don’t want to talk anymore
Can I just watch Netflix all night
And order wine ?
I will be fine tomorrow
The sun always come back

I hope you can just hold me and tell me that you feel better.
Sometimes I feel like giving up but it’s not in my genes I keep taking care.
I look into my phone and know that nothing will pop up and I know you know it hurts me but at least you feel better and you will be better without me.

What if all love songs should be sing for ourselves? What is the real love is being in love with yourself and all the rest is just a plus.

I am tired of those stories that never work. Of those feelings that always hurts, of those peole that always lie of this society that is always wrong.

I am just going to listen at those happy love song thinking they are written for me. Like my soul and my head are 2 different persons and protect and love each other forever. Because at the end the only person who will stay forever will be me. At the end the only person I want to keep close is me.

I promise I would keep myself happy because no-one is responsible more for my happiness.