I hope you can just hold me and tell me that you feel better.
Sometimes I feel like giving up but it’s not in my genes I keep taking care.
I look into my phone and know that nothing will pop up and I know you know it hurts me but at least you feel better and you will be better without me.

Apparently you have to look where you mind is going when you wander — that’s the way you know where you heart is.

Where is yours ?

Because mine is all there !

I just get through all of the poems that I wrote one by one crying until i read this text that I actually wrote one year ago crying about my bireday reminding myself how lucky I was and that self love should be the only love that really matters

And that I was actually crying because I was living the life I dreamt of that needs sacrifice and hurt

And at the end ... this year my birthday is coming too and I am still living my dream life so come on let’s keep going

Here we go again I have to cut my feelings.
I decided to make sure he feels good about anything that I am a secure point that I am his safe.
At the end no one is doing the same for you. I know the lesson but I have to learn it again and again.
When I decide to share a bit more it collapse maybe I should just keep it all. Anyway no one has never understand me... expect maybe you. It’s crazy how I think of going into your arm everytime I cry.

I notice recently that everything I am good at bored me, Everything I am not good at runs after me.

I love to be different but sometimes I wish to be normal.

Just writing normal makes me realised how being different is a chance.

Stop complaining you are living a beautiful life : stop thinking LIVE instead

I'm tired of people who say they want to live their dream and never do anything to achieve them.

So i will do it for you, live by my dreams.

Join me when  you get there.

Hopefully maybe someone share the same dreams i have somedays.

I am sorry I fall in love this night
I did not mean to fall this night
I know how to play, it's always the same,
But it did not play this night
Every time i close my eyes I am back to this night.

I can’t be someone propriety.
I am not a jewellery we wear on shows and put on a side when the party is over.
I am not to play or I rather win the game.

I remember loving a lot of you.

Teenage lovers.

My first was useful, my second kind, my third animal, my forth useless and my fifth friendly.

We were teenagers.

Now stop there and remember when we were teenagers. All those small situations and compliments that makes you feel unbreakable like the world belong in your hands.

Teenage love.

I miss this love so much. Maybe that was the one I needed after all.

Teenage love is pure, is crazy, is for life in our mind. Oh but remember how Teenage love is painful? Do I really want to get there?

Teenage love have no fears, let me get there.

Tell me, after all which love is the best when you know all of them ?

I have the feeling I got all I ever wanted nevertheless I still don’t feel full.

Sometimes I feel so empty and I can’t control it. Then I remind myself that I have much more than anyone around and that should complete me. But I have been educated in a way that I don’t have to care about what other have and I should especially never compare myself to any. That this will be the way to find happiness.

But those days I can’t stop comparing to make myself feel better for 5 minutes and then the good feeling goes.

Come on brain let’s think by ourselves let’s forget them around let’s focus on what we want.

Why should I find someone ?
Why should I need someone else everything
Why don’t we share ?
Why don’t we spread love and happiness

I want to live in my dreams the one where everything always goes right and I am the only one to decide when it goes left.

Do I really ever regret going left ? I don’t really know because every time I feel empty the only way I see is left.

Right is nice, left feel so good.

I can’t believe that I was taking about what i want and I just write going left.

Anyway right is right, left has left.
—-
Then he said I love you

being alone