on the corners of her mouth
lay a sight to see
something so pure
yet gazing
like the sun.
from that moment
i knew
you were a strange one.

there are two types of sadness

there’s the kind of sadness
we ignore and
try to get rid of it
by finding new things to do
or we find someone to talk to
by blatantly avoiding any type of conversation
about feeling sad
about having any feelings at all
and then there’s that kind of sadness
that takes over
and it consumes any activity we do
we know it’s there
and there’s no possible way to avoid it
so we feed it exactly what it wants
it craves the sad music
it craves the isolation
it craves the anxiousness
and the sadness comes storming in
it has no manners
here we are calling sadness, an “it”
when all it is
is a feeling
that most people
call home

the sun drips
like
a
yellow yolk

oozes
down
the gold knots
of my spine
breathe the first of Spring days
the radio plays our favorite song

i see you backwards
quickly
all the times we had
vulnerable;
gone.

the sky is blue, the lake is blue
your eyes are blu
and they say i look like your
sister
oh gods. help me
i can’t feel anything
except you
and everything here is you

the smell before it rains and the taste of that first sip of tea in -20 degrees

the slow untangling of your thoughts with every beat of the drum, the way the wind blows right through you just enough to move you forward and never enough to blow you down

the sound of typing fingers when you know you're onto something good, the feeling of your own, and finally not his, skin

the seasons are changing and baby so are you / six senses are helping you develop into someone new

I believed it wholeheartedly
When you used to say
That I was like honey
Soft smooth and sweet
Glistening like the amber shafts
That coruscated upon your tanned skin
When you yawned turned and moaned in your sleep
Before opening your caramel brown eyes
And uttering my name
from those dusty red slightly chapped lips
Without any reason
Just like you breathe or blink
And my eyes would sparkle
With a rapturous delight
Just like that empty glass bottle
Near your windowsill
That shone resplendently
When the sun smiled and winked at it
Or the wisps of grey misty clouds
That wandered despondently
But glowed luminously
When the scattered light of an aureate moon
Caressed them tenderly
You were the radiance
That engulfed the stygian darkness
Bleeding from my heart
Suffusing my veins
You were the vibrant spring
That restored my shattered pieces
sealed them with an undying warmth
And watched me replenish
As I bloomed from a withering bud
To the most exquisite flower
When your unconditional love
Percolated through my dead roots
But a blunder you committed
For you made me believe
That this happiness that you gifted me
Would never ever recede
it diminished and vanished
At that agonizing moment
when you left my side
And entered inside the gates of heaven
Now you don't seem to hear my cry
My tear ducts have long dried
My throat stings
I can barely speak
My skin is swollen and ruddy
Covered in bruises that don't seem to heal
My wrists are scarred
My lips crack and bleed
My complexion has turned sallow
And i believe wholeheartedly
That im not like honey anymore

For how long
Will these memories
Heavy with profound melancholy
Cloud my thoughts in a twilight shade
And blur my vision
With puddles of perpetual monsoon rain
How long
Should I wait
For the hands of time
To caress and heal my seared skin
Peel off its dense layers
Scarred and stinging
with fathomless anguish
Of premature losses
Repressed resentments
Maturating like wine
Cause a diminutive hole inside
Has gradually become cavernous
Filled with a darkest void
In it echoes my voiceless cries
Resonating with an intensity
That renders me senseless
Paralysis me to an extent
That my reception and comprehension
For any invigorating and uplifting stimulus
Becomes remarkably impotent
And I can read
Heartless written in their eyes
Which hurts
More than I can write