Priyadarshini Mukherjee

Priyadarshini Mukherjee Nov 2014

He used to be a healer
A man who would give you a boy-ish hug
And let you believe in fairies and honesty
He used to be a charmer
I knew him
I knew him not

The two of them were in love
Those two who aren’t even looking at each other
across the floor
But are aware of what they are saying
To which hand their hand finds a new warmth
I knew them
I knew them not

They used to be my family
A group of people who were
Far more dear than my own folks
We would laugh and cry together
Sharing our worries and ambitions
And dreams which would never come true

So many nights
Spent under these very stars
Who bear witness
To everyone I have met and every emotion I have felt
They know my mistake
They know that I believed everything was real
And permanent
In a life as temporary as mine
They knew I believed that when these people met me
They opened their masks and became themselves
They knew I was fooling myself
With a truth
So convincing and so delusional
That
Even I bought it
Throughout the time
Inch by inch
Through and through

#love #truth #honesty #unrequited #know #emotional #detachment #attachment

Priyadarshini Mukherjee Sep 2014

Her love

She loves her.

She loved her
with little rays of sunshine
and
Pitter patter tears.

Her love was like dew drops
on grass blades
on a misty morning.
Like a butterfly loitering around a little girl.
Like money on a starved beggars hand.

It was a humane love
built with
illogical trust and belief.
It was made of burnt bricks
of built up grief and an exhaustion
which comes from an eternal search
for a handful of love.

Her love was the size of her soul.
It was next to everything she would own even after death.

~~~~~~~

Sunshine

#love #poem #pain #her #learning #amateur #pleaseread #handful

Priyadarshini Mukherjee Aug 2014

Pain

I write a word
I cut a slit
I send the message
another slit
I cry for you
One more slit
I die inside
I bleed a bit

This poem I write
Is in memory of those of times
when
Words
would
f
   l
     o
        w

from me to
- You-

and I hope you know
That with every word
every             of blood
drop

I miss you
and I miss you
and I miss you even more

#pain #blood #you #me #cut

Aug 2014

Pablo Neruda

Saddest Poem

I can write the saddest poem of all tonight.

Write, for instance: "The night is full of stars,
and the stars, blue, shiver in the distance."

The night wind whirls in the sky and sings.

I can write the saddest poem of all tonight.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.

On nights like this, I held her in my arms.
I kissed her so many times under the infinite sky.

She loved me, sometimes I loved her.
How could I not have loved her large, still eyes?

I can write the saddest poem of all tonight.
To think I don't have her. To feel that I've lost her.

To hear the immense night, more immense without her.
And the poem falls to the soul as dew to grass.

What does it matter that my love couldn't keep her.
The night is full of stars and she is not with me.

That's all. Far away, someone sings. Far away.
My soul is lost without her.

As if to bring her near, my eyes search for her.
My heart searches for her and she is not with me.

The same night that whitens the same trees.
We, we who were, we are the same no longer.

I no longer love her, true, but how much I loved her.
My voice searched the wind to touch her ear.

Someone else's. She will be someone else's. As she once
belonged to my kisses.
Her voice, her light body. Her infinite eyes.

I no longer love her, true, but perhaps I love her.
Love is so short and oblivion so long.

Because on nights like this I held her in my arms,
my soul is lost without her.

Although this may be the last pain she causes me,
and this may be the last poem I write for her.

Aug 2014

paper boats

Bleed

Hands creep up
Eyes look down
Blouses fall
Nations shout
Sit still, sit still
Through it all
Little girl,
The madness
The media
The justice
The rave
Sit still sit still
Through it all,
The politics
The disgust
The dismissal
The frowns
Sit still sit still
Through it all
little girl
sit still sit still
*Through it all

...satire

#helpless #**** #speakup

Priyadarshini Mukherjee Aug 2014

Tu Me Manques

You walked into my life
And strode over my feelings
Crushing
My heart
In every step
Throughout the path
You traversed
My blood marked your way
When you ran back
To the entrance
Fearing I would value you
A little too much
Scared that you would fall in love
A little too much

But Alas ain’t I the little girl?
Who had once sent a prayer up above
“Watch over him, Lord!”
And you struck me down with your words
And your actions so well constructed
And I?
Being the little girl as always
I didn’t even try
To chain you down with the fire of my love
What if it burned you down?
What then would be the remedy?
I didn’t even try
To drag you back
With snarles of seduction
Or little sweet nothings
I didn’t even try
To smoke your cigarette
And kiss your lips
To match your taste

I just watched you
Walking across
A patch of grassland
When you mistook my tears
To be
Mere dew drops

Dear darling friend of mine
Some day you will find
A star shining bright up in the sky
Beckoning you to love
Not to criticize
Dear darling love of mine
And that day you will realize
That the sparks of success raining down on you
Have already been paid for
With the life of a little girl
Who
Loved you a little too much
Who
Cared about you a little too much
Who
Let herself fall down thirty storeys
In loving memory

In French, "I miss you" isn't really said. They say Tu Me Manques which means "I am missing from you". I came across this word in tumblr while going through my feed. It is - indeed - a very intimate word and since I am detaching myself from most loved ones, I hereby say TU ME MANQUES MAYAA

#love #heartbreak #words #you #nostalgia #unrequited #miss #missing #missingyou #tumemanques

Priyadarshini Mukherjee Aug 2014

Unfair - Ungood - Unright

Staring at you from the corner of my eye
There are hundreds seated here
Still my vision strays across the line
These feelings can't be right

It's like the moon falling in love with the sun
though they are a team, they can never be one
Love can't be my might
These feelings can't be right

Why are you so scared to look me in the eye?
I hate it when she looks at you with expectancy in her eyes
I feel like destroying the worlds for you
These feelings can't be right

I know that I'm alone in this street
Every part of myself I have left behind
Because I know that mystery will always love darkness
Though sunshine will be right by her side
My wishes just seem so "Unright"
I face the truth again -
These feelings can't be right

Now-a-days I stay away from you
When you don't look at me, that is when I look at you
When you don't hear me, I have said a thousand times
' I love you '
These feelings can't be right

Every morning when I open my eyes
And Sunshine strikes this porcelain skin from the skies
A carnage of hope is all I visualize
I roll down my sleeves to cover the scars
My reflection whispers to me
'The mirror never lies'
These feelings aren't right

I wish I'd be able to stand in front of you
And express what I exactly feel about you
But I cannot set forth in that venture
" The way is suspicious, the result uncertain, perhaps destructive."
And if you ever know about this side of me
The only thing that will come out of you will be
" These feelings can't be right "

Beyond the precincts of his eyes
Everything seems to be delusional
his eyes have the power my foes could **** for
- to rip my soul apart every minute
Every second of my life
And I'm reminded again-
These feelings can't be right

But now that I've realized
These feelings can't be right
I am sure
That today is the first day of the rest of my life ...

Hear me say || Let today be the first day of the rest of your life

#love #feelings #rejection #myself #acceptance #times #positivity #reminder #tough #unfair