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Lovey Aug 2015
I have gone through the pain those whom are close know.
I have endured it all.
Theres those whom pity me or my life.
I ask for no pity of those.
Nor sadness.
I only ask as of eyes upon my passion.
My life.
It is not one to say its well.
Its not quite easy but ive dealt.
I may have broken but i musnt say im no queen.
I may feel deep pain from a time, A time called the past.
I've learned.
My past is not to consume whom I am.
My past is a story.
Its my pain i hold yes.
It still hurts me to the present day.
I've come to know my pain dearly well.
But i've turned pain.
Death defying pain into wisdom and strength.
Ive become the queen i was.
I've only became stronger through the time being.
Pain kills but also heals.

-Lovey
Lovey Aug 2015
There was once.
Once a time.
I was broken.
I may say I am broken.
But no, Never broken as then.
I woke up with agony of life every day.
I woke up with pain every single day.
I could feel this heart broken.
I was lost of whom I had been.
A shadow of darkness filled my skies.
All i saw were dark deep clouds of sorrow.
Despair and sorrow took over me.
The light inside my heart I once had, Began to fade.
I was a strong queen of a kingdom.
I was a well grounded strong warrior of an entire life or.
I walked a sacred ground.
I held a title of a queen.
I held the title as the warrior whom never broke.
I was known for no fear of sadness.
Apparently I had never been sad.
Til tragedy struck in the halls of love.
Each day, more and more of the forest, the kingdom i held up high.
Started to burn.
A war struck.
A war that would **** many.
I struck through long whiles of time.
The forest I had turned into a mere kingdom had simply began to fall.
The trees began to burn to the ground.
The living of those began to fade.
People died.
They simply couldn't fight on.
Many restless days were spent of nightmares.
One day.
The kingdom I built solid handedly.
Was gone.
It was dust.
Merely blew away.
I became trapped inside a slowly dark place.
I was still in light.
Finding my way through.
It was bearable.
I was alive.
But.
I ventured on.
I left the dusty palace of broken halls.
I walked across the barer of sorrow and sadness.
I ran through it.
My curiosity made me venture to far.
Into a land I began to fade into..
I became weak as I walked through.
My lit up heart.
My wonderful bliss of peace.
This forest.
This forest I thought was just mere show not over taking.
I was walking along side the one person whom survived through the war.
The war or sorrow.
It had began to win.
The person whom I walked with told me "the war did not win if your light is still in your heart."
My simple heart.
Guarded by the nature of the sticks that mended to keep it locked and safe.
Began to become dim.
It began to become to dim and dark inside of me.
One day.
I stopped to wonder.
If the forest shall consume me.
The blood of my skin dripped onto white snow.
I watched it fall.
Each drop.
Turned the snow red.
My lit up heart had been blown out.
The sticks began to break inside of me.
They became dust just as my kingdom.
I started to become to weak to keep moving forward.
Each day.
There would be hope we would find a way together out of the forest.
But each day it was crushed.
Each day, Was a back and forth game.
Of hope and tears.
Each day more blood fell on the snow paved grounds.
I became to think of death.
It became consuming of my thoughts.
The person whom I was walking by.
Was correct.
The war ended as my heart and my light broke.
As passing days went on.
Sorrow grew over me.
Pain became to consume me.
I was still strong.
I put a fight up strong.
I went through and through and kept my ground.
As much as I could.
I broke.
I mean truthfully broke.
My broken stick heart, turned to dust and blew away..
I had no heart.
It was gone.
I had a soul but a very slim soul.
The person. Whom walked aside me.
Was being trapped into the forest of dark sorrow.
I was fragile.
As night came on a weak cold day.
We began to become trapped.
Them more than me.
As i woke in the morning rise.
He simply vanished and left a note.
Telling me "I'm sorry, and goodbye at once"
I was wondered and distraught.
The person whom i became so dearly close.
Vanished.
As i went on.
On my own.
I became dearly lonely.
Day skies became more darker each and every day.
I came to my knee's.
I first cried for the first time.
I sat there on solid ice.
I was frozen.
Scars and scars began to add up on my little wrist.
The colder i got the more it felt like ice was being broke on my little wrist.
Ice became to what i was.
I walked no further.
I became a prisoner of eternal sorrow and agony.
I let my kingdom fall.
I fell to my knee's.
Darkness pushed me to the poisoning walls.
And destroyed all hope.
I became locked in chains.
Chains of eternal sorrow..
-Lovey-
Lovey Jul 2015
Happiness so suddenly becomes crushed by the blink of an eye.
People wonder why I hate to be happy.
Because at least being destroyed you dont go threw the hurtful ride of pain.
People wonder why I hate to pieces to smile.
Cause its easier to stay in tears then be crushed again.
People wonder why I would want to be sad.
Because then I wouldn't fall and hurt so badly.
I've come used to the circle of sadness.
I used to love being happy but im scared of it..
I've become afraid of being happy.
Because when i do theres something or someone whom finds a way to break it.
When I smiles it feels amazing.
But once its crushed and turned to tears its hurts more than anything.
To know your afraid to be happy.
That is close to the worst pain to face..
-Mickie Rouxe-
Lovey Jul 2015
Its ok to sit and cry at times. But dont sit there to long.
You have to get up and move on with your life.
Or its a matter of time till you fall and all you are is tears.
If somebody wants to walk out of your life let them,
Especially if you tried to be the best you could be,and you've done everything. If they still  want to walk away then learn its their loss not yours.
Half the people you are going to be sitting crying,and being depressed over are you going to even remember their name in 3 years?
Some people will come into your life for a life time.
Some come for a season.
You have to know what is what.
People get married to people their only supposed to there to teach you one lesson then wonder why you have so many problems in the marriage.
Then they wonder why  they can not find piece anywhere
Because people are misplacing the people whom are only supposed to come into your life to be there for a short while not an entire lifetime and it will mess the things up.
Think of a tree
You've got your leaves that fall off when the season changes.
Thats fine.
Theres a lot of people in the world who are like that.
Some people are like branches on the tree.
But once you step on your own.
They break and fall off the tree.
But once you find those few people who are the roots of your tree thats when your special.
Cause those are the people who are going no where.
Once you get your roots  you good.
Once you do let the rest go
Dont just throw people away.
If you tell the person the thing thats wrong and they try to fix it keep them.
But if they keep doing something that keeps hurting you thats a person who doesnt care you have to let them go no matter the pain.
You have to learn how to be on your own then how are you gonna learn to be with someone else.
You have your time to work on yourself.
Till the world puts someone for you to love.
-mickie rouxe-
Lovey Jul 2015
Time-Time is fragile you dont know how much you have of it.
You're past is what makes you but is also some of what you need to let go and only hold on to the happiness of the past. The future is you're hope to seek happiness, you're dreams of the future time. The present is you seconds,minutes,and hours that you have now. The present is you're most precious part of the time you have cause the seconds you have now you may run out and not have a future. So keep you're present time dearly in mind and do not waste it.-mickie rouxe-
Lovey Jul 2015
I cant stand my own tears.
I cant stand my own pain.
I cant stand my hurt.
I cant stand on my feet again.
I cant say im ok.
I cant stand on my own..
I cant keep it in anymore.
I cant hold everything in without bursting into tears.
Im not strong anymore.. What happened?-mickie-
Lovey Jul 2015
I need a light.
some kinda of way to tell me ill get out my darkness.
That things get better.
I need some way to know im not stuck forever.
I need a way to know im not insane.
I need a way to stop my tears.
I need a way not to break.
I need something to show me i wont be broken forever.
I need that something now.
I need something to fix me.
I need something to help me out of this.
I just need something to make me feel safe.
I just need me back.
I lost who i am.
I dont know who i am anymore.
I just need some way to make me ok again, Before i cry again forever.
I just need something to block my tears.
I just need anything to make me whole.
I just need the one thing that can show me i can stop crying.
I just need simple happiness.
For once.
Its all i want and need..-mickie-
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