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Automobile prohibitive maintenance costs
pitches me pitifully begging for alms
lamenting dog forsaken
melon collie unpleasant circumstances
pleading with outstretched palms
disgraced to beg, perhaps donate
major ***** and/or entire body

to ease vehicular qualms
aha... methinks the missus could pose
as ventriloquist after mortician embalms
these lovely bones, but, hmm...
even then post mortem
agitation most likely becalms...

Straitjacketed impasse finds
yours truly going for broke
to nurse our 2009 Hyundai Sonata,
which monetary outlay doth yoke
mine fate heading, née accelerating
at ever increasing speed

emitting plume of smoke
which thick noxious exhaust
would immediately choke
any innocent wheel chaired,
or ambulatory pedestrian,
bicyclist (think Chernobyl),
a nightmare that did woke.

Mein kampf reduced between
a rock and hard place
analogous to trapped betwixt
Scylla and Charybdis
inadequate funds to purchase

newer preowned car,
nor paltry monies to erase
utter nightmare, yes
father did spring me
unexpected mullah, yet

the near future will menace
this dirt poor aging baby boomer,
and his moderately significant other,
she too needs more than solace
lacking gainful employment and

financial resources, maybe brazen
to broadcast such
amidst digital populace
such tsuris (Yiddish meaning
trouble or woe; aggravation)...

Just letting of figurative steam
emblematic of this easily
intimidated fellow with decent
original (long "e") meme
all throughout his life shouldered,

or voluntarily stationed to sidelines
courtesy crème de la crème
topnotch competitors within
human race attain the
supposed "American dream"

or similar facsimile thereof
finding one fool on the hill
gagging at extreme
pauperism, yes mainly linkedin
to series of unfortunate events

(Lemony Snicket would ogle,
envy chiefly hanker ring)
hashtagging me more supreme
regarding amassing adversity.

Thank you stranger near or afar
understanding how or why
Sylvia Plath crafted The Bell Jar
a cult classic, I would never
attempt to duplicate, my par

for the course literary contribution
might... humph earn me one lone star
if ever dabblings in scratching
out feeble efforts courtesy this word Tsar.
and/or try distilling my spirits
at losing gamble
if curious (by George) proceed
reading reasonable rhyme,
I guarantee the following words ramble.

Though flush with good humor
pun one mock two yields negligible
true cash equivalent value won
dirt poor offspring privileged as prodigal son
pockets bursting with legal tender,
when just yesterday I reveled in fun.

All polite declinations
strung together would circle...
(fill in the blank) x times
matter of fact,
I just got a slew of them
today April 26th, 2022,
what a lucky man
me haint an idealist...,
but winning poetry (writing) contest
or purchasing lottery tickets...
yeah, nothing butta pipe dream

such improbable whimsical notion
linkedin and tantamount
with milkmaid and pail
Aesop pose fabulous incredulous solution
finally good riddance
hand to mouth existence
hello riches, perchance a dollop
and/or sizable windfall courtesy
drawn PowerBall and/or Mega Million ticket,
whereby yours truly suddenly

cursed with more'n chump change,
and/or abundant money
would experience "fifteen minutes of fame"
flush with friends and relatives,
who metaphorically came out of woodwork,
I (a misanthrope) never knew existed
(perhaps even marriage propositions,
no matter wedded bliss prevails)
interesting... how moderate
and/or substantial wealth
suddenly finds chock a block

acquisitions accessible at my fingertips
(regarding brand new automobile,
custom designed house,
travel opportunities galore
(maybe even vacation to Mars)
(despite prevalence coronavirus - COVID -19),
nevertheless honed awareness,
viz immutability altering
pubescent stunted emotional, physical
and social development
plus profusely sweating hands
then and now, social anxiety

all the while knowing money
can't buy happiness,
yet once and for all at long last
free and clear of grinding poverty
cuz groveling along
the pockmarked highway
avails countless exit ramps
plethora of choices
inviting strong arm of the law
for instance how to be analogous to jolly roger
piloting immense hijacked ship of state

(approximating size of Rhode Island)
equipped with the latest trappings
matter of fact replete
with every creature comfort
analogous to rich
self sufficient independent country
allowing, enabling, and providing
a warm welcome - think unfurled
Harris tweed Scottish welcome mat.

POSTSCRIPT: Feel free to be
kickstarter to (mine nonexistent)
Gofundme site Cree
hating altruism toward me,
whose monetary shortfall
cruel fate did decree,
though if yours truly ever
pens his autobiography,
ye will become privy
to mein kampf awash
with squandered key
opportunities harkening
back to primary school.

Argh...,I unwittingly thwarted
necessary positive growth
once in a lifetime occasions,
thus penury finds me
rattling figurative tin cup
for small largesse - ha.
Though flush with good humor
pun one mock two yields negligible
true cash equivalent value won
dirt poor offspring privileged as prodigal son
pockets bursting with legal tender,
where just yesterday I had none.

All polite declinations
strung together would circle...
(fill in the blank)
matter of fact, I just got a slew of them
today June 9th, 2020, what a lucky man
me haint an idealist...,

but winning poetry (writing) contest
or purchasing lottery tickets...
yeah, nothing butta pipe dream
such improbable whimsical notion
linkedin and tantamount
with milkmaid and pail

Aesop pose fabulous incredulous solution
finally good riddance
hand to mouth existence
hello riches, perchance a dollop
and/or sizable windfall courtesy
drawn PowerBall and/or Mega Million ticket

whereby yours truly suddenly
cursed with chump change,
and/or abundant money
would experience "fifteen minutes of fame"
flush with friends and relatives
I (a misanthrope) never knew existed
(perhaps even marriage proposition,

no matter wedded bliss prevails)
interesting... how moderate
and/or substantial wealth
suddenly finds chock a block
acquisitions (regarding brand new automobile,
custom designed house,

travel opportunities galore
(maybe even vacation to Mars)
(despite coronavirus - COVID -19) prevalence,
nevertheless awareness viz immutability altering
pubescent stunted emotional, physical
and social development

profusely sweating hands, social anxiety
all the while knowing money
can't buy happiness,
yet once and for all at long last
free and clear of grinding poverty
cuz groveling along

the pockmarked highway
avails countless exit ramps
plethora of choices
how to be analogous to jolly Roger
piloting immense ship of state
(approximating size of Rhode Island)

equipped with the latest trappings
matter of fact replete
with every creature comfort
analogous to rich
self sufficient independent country
allowing, enabling, and providing
a warm welcome - think unfurled
Harris tweed Scottish welcome mat.

Meanwhile somewhere in Schwenksville,
Pennsylvania resident
(within apartment B44)...
tenant fritters precious time wishfully thinking
(luxuriant life within theoretical leisure class)
finding this nameless scrivener
invariably hoisting himself by his own petard.
(Asia may not know, this LIX city split baby boomer now ranks himself as an in denture charred sir vent reflecting on that painful instant when enamel collided with frozen water versus the recent removal of all teeth - courtesy of periodontal disease, and reckons how quaint that ****** fracas).
--------------------------------------------------------­----------------------------
inxs of cold playing air
froze natural pond, where
over head Canadian geese did blare
honking the latest goose sip loud and clear
when from behind a bush

   (color antler protected doe against fear
of smashed pumpkin) did peek a deer
alert to any danger by parking
   upright either one or both ear

lest predator doth lurk and induce fear
while Harris Family and friends
   oblivious attired in wintry gear
which protection from cold caused difficulty to hear

necessitating cupped gloved hands
   to punctuate every muffled word
to be but barely heard
akin to talking with mouth full of custard

above the quiet riotous mirth
   from this then gawky child nerd
precariously maintaining balance
   on his skates and glide like a bird
such attempts made
   this then boy appear quite absurd

ah, if only this mind of mine
   did two step quick think
but woe misfortune awaited
   across the bumpy natural rink

blithely jettisoning myself hither and yon
   like a rolling stone going plink
unaware while in camouflage pose
   disguised as one sneaky slippery fink
that snuck up in a blink

that found me squarely face down
   shattering left front tooth
immediately discovered
   via tongue as private sleuth
finding me in extreme agitated state forsooth
as if on fire from red hot chili peppers
   wrought from jagged booth

winning sympathy from parents
   who did level best to tend distraught son
who ushered playback of events
   with less disastrous rerun
praying for an angel

   to grant reverse outcome brought none
gut wrenching grief
   immediately terminated former fun
damage irreversible and
  perfect white smile forever broke con!
inxs of cold playing air
froze natural pond, where over head Canadian geese did blare
honking the latest goose sip loud and clear
when from behind a bush (color of smashed pumpkin) did peek a deer
alert to any danger by parking upright either one or both ear
lest predator doth lurk and induce fear
while Harris Family and friends oblivious attired in wintry gear
which protection from cold caused difficulty to hear

necessitating cupped gloved hands to punctuate every muffled word
to be but barely heard
akin to talking with mouth full of custard
above the quiet riotous mirth from this then gawky child nerd
precariously maintaining balance on his skates and glide like a bird
such attempts made this boy appear quite absurd

ah, if only this mind of mine did two step quick think
but woe misfortune awaited across the bumpy natural rink
blithely jettisoning myself hither and yon
   like a rolling stone going plink
unaware while in camouflage pose
   disguised as one sneaky slippery fink
that snuck up in a blink

that found me squarely face down shattering left front tooth
immediately discovered via tongue as private sleuth
finding me in extreme agitated state forsooth
as if on fire from red hot chili peppers wrought from jagged booth

winning sympathy from parents
   who did level best to tend distraught son
who ushered playback of events with less disastrous rerun
praying for an angel to grant reverse outcome brought none
gut wrenching grief immediately terminated former fun
damage irreversible and perfect white smile forever broke con!
(true anecdote circa late 1960's early 1970's) prithee
which cold wintry temperatures re:
wheely jogged unpleasant event in axle all let tea

aye rem member inxs of cold playing air
froze natural on gull din pond,
   where over head Canadian geese did blare
honking the latest goose sip
   loud and crystal clear,

when from behind a bush
   (color of smashed pumpkin)
   did peek a deer
alert to any rod nee danger field
   by parking upright
   either one or both ear

instinct flashed warning to doe eyed creature
   lest predator doth lurk and induce fear
while Harris Family and friends
   oblivious attired in wintry gear,

which padded material cladding
   adequately protected me from cold
caused clouded difficulty to see
   (thru fog coated glasses),

   and muffled keen hear
ring any forewarning
   as chief identifier icier
   this then gawky child nerd
precariously maintaining balance
   on his skates

  gliding, than extemoraneous
  ill prepareed head over blades swan dive
   shutterflying like  a bird soon tubby goosed
such attempts made this boy
   appear quite absurd
ah, if only this mind of mine shut oral trapdoor,
   and force haw debacle with preturnatural wink

   did two step quick think,
but woe misfortune awaited
  across the bumpy natural rink
blithely jettisoning myself,

   to and fro, hither and yon
   like a rolling stone
   (that gathered no hearty moss) going plink
unaware while in camouflage pose
   disguised as one sneaky, slippery icy fink
that snuck up in a blink

found me squarely face down
   shattering left front tooth
immediately discovered
   via tongue as private sleuth
found me in an extremely agitated state forsooth
as if on fire from red hot chili peppers
   wrought jagged dentin chewable booth

a scant mere
seconds to late, when with a crash, which near
concussion smacked noggin
   hard against blocky chunk hove ice
   informing gap toothed email

   (actually, that incident
   found me quite traumatized,
   especially without any solution to milk),
   i.e. unpreparedly tasting solid rock hard material -
   with ugly reflection that didst stare
from a looking glass re: mirror,
   which aye avoided at all possible costs where
to cast and fit mouth
   with a provisional crown entailed maybe a year.

necessitating cupped gloved hands
   to punctuate every muffled word
to be but barely heard
akin to talking with mouth full of custard
above the quiet riotous mirth
   analogous to twittering bird

winning sympathy from parents,
   who did level best to tend distraught son
who ushered playback of events
   with less disastrous rerun
praying for a high lee angel

   to grant reverse outcome brought none
gut wrenching grief
   immediately terminated former fun
damage irreversible
   and perfect smile of pearly white
   forever broke
   NOT the least itty bitty funny, comical,
   nor countenanced devastation done.
Methinks lame excuses poorly explain
absent presence gnosh *** wing up to
acknowledge our papa's ninetieth orbit
around sun, nor dearly beloved eldest
commencement successfully, modestly,
honestly (applying her smarts) as freshly

minted (sage) University of Pennsylvania
graduate, now where webbed wide world
avails untold opportunities to make positive
accomplishments, this papa never set
similar goals for himself, he languished
leaving untested latent abilities, now glum,

distraught, afflicted with irrevocable jangling
lamentation foregoing, forfeiting, forging
pathetic enactment regarding livingsocial
versus squirreling himself hermetically
sealed never linkedin with training sights
keeping traction upon maximizing native

abilities, thus frequent depressive bouts
find me prone speculating nonexistence,
(i.e. death), yet averse toward aggressive
unconscionable ***** deeds done dirt cheap
expediting end game of Life, cuz day after
week after month... pits me against hand

to mouth monetary woe whereat cost to
maintain, insure, fuel 2019 Hyundai Sonata
takes lion's share of monetary impossible
mission to become financially solvent, and
hashtagged social anxiety deters persevering
gainful employment, where self loathing

regarding predilection with profuse sweaty
hands finds yours truly aggravated enough
to admit disability to enjoy remains of days,
weeks, months... subsumed by penuriousness
diminishes excitement toward any purpose,
plus disgruntled without webbed bliss, nor

does bound by marriage appeal, yet the
missus would be left high and dry, (or low
and wet if she dwelt closer to sea level), this
bleakness especially pronounced as role of
fatherhood no longer viable, enjoyable, applicable
aware how offspring impacted by poor examples

of parents accentuated by appalling housekeeping,
additionally progeny's psyche indelibly defiled,
hi-jacked, scarred with husband and wife devoid
of affection toward each other, and NOT prioritizing
welfare of deaux darling daughters want nothing
more with us, which evokes sentimentality, when

interaction between biological dada and then young
girls generated laughter and utterances regularly
voicing "I love you and mama" came to screeching
halt upon, particularly selfishly expending valuable
time answering and posting personal advertisements
seeking discreet liaisons, and within overheard

half conversation with earshot (even if bedroom
door locked) prurient laced conversations, and
contrived secret rendezvous (most like intuitively
suspected by eldest, she still harbors resentment

towards yours truly countless shortcomings only
vicariously experienced getting invites to fully
functional dynamic, immaculate, roomy Mainline
classmates living envious lives.

Objectionable behavior (mine) as dada also applied
not so prodigal son question judgement cast during
salutary estrangement constituting singular male
progeny within family of origin.
Ambiguity within mine
doodling Yankee mind that
arises, asper current
hoopla harrumphing
American Civil War statues,
which verbal/written spat

particularly regarding southern generals
(many atop horses) arouses
call to arms whereat,
excited curiosity possibly twill incite
dangerous extraneous, mutinous,
treasonous *** for tat

promulgation exhuming ghosts
abolitionists of Dead Poets Society
screeching like a wildcat
signaling resumption, sans
war between the states recruiting
every able bodied proletariat

after well nigh one
hundred fifty four plus years,
which repurpose sing reformat
might transform mine
humdrum friggin existence
into one enviable secretariat,

where these ears will
hear constant ratatat,
when bombardiers din
temporarily doth pause
scampering atop rampart
analogous to polecat

espying the freshly minted "enemy"
unconcerned if maneuvers induce pitapat
cuz resumption of battle will drown,
this weasel granted leeway within Union
Schwenksville, Pennsylvanian nonfat
spry old man confident fighter

despite civilian life
extant, viz noncombat
acclimated to rustic/primitive conditions
honest to dog abode comprised
thatched hut housed within mudflat

only during rainfall rigging
makeship shower plus laundromat
counting lucky stars kismat
blessed without necessity
to whip out handy dandy hemostat,
thus yours truly ready for action

quite content nsync
within no man's land habitat
linkedin with nearest battalion via
microchip embedded within
noggin rock solid as hardhat
genetically modified lest

Johnny Rebel lob brickbat
also on lookout against
swampy hungry creatures,
thence I will ******
these lovely bones akin to acrobat.
Across the realm of gray matter
slowly percolating within tissue
composed of neuronal, glial
and endothelial cells, and although
there must be biological rules
that determine the numbers
of cells of each subtype
and the volumes (or masses)
occupied by them,
little is known about such rules,
if they indeed exist

nevertheless, ah haint goot
no trade secret, boot verily
attest adventitious, bounteous, and
capacious divine intervention
(analogous to invisible
Charge of the Light Brigade)
timely saving amazing grace
engorges, engirdles, and engenders mine
body, mind and spirit,
which psychic triage
accruing, germinating,

and manifesting coming
forth, and appearing
at the most opportune
pluperfect tinder kindling
jawboning indeed, and
instagramming optimal instant –
sparing irreparable cerebral damage,
yet inflicting temporary
temporal lobe trauma
not surprising giving
brain big bang, sans

tickly totally tubular raise
zing trumpeting – analogous
to Portuguese man-of-war
sea render tyranny
(Sic semper tyrannis)
over fifty plus shades sways
undulating cerebral cortex
doth lightly secretly
with naturally secreted
unguent liberal mindedly braise,
which explanation might meet

with skepticism, but crazy as such
"FAKE" holy transcendent
heavenly extra corporeal
modus operandi may seem,
an inexplicable force
powerfully Herculean sensation
grips me noggin leavening
mental scratch pad in a daze
of blinding poetic inspiration doth    
like quaffing goblet
of gin n tonic faze

this phenomena plays
a particularly puzzling role
on account difficult to phrase
in light of my being an atheist,
which non deistic, theistic,
nor Vedic precept stays
metaphorically locked, linkedin, and
leveraged in place,
despite non religious confession
augmentation, attribution,
and association showers inspiration,

where eyes fixedly glaze
as literary creativity attaining
high psychological grades
dramatically engages fantastically
with cosmic force appearing
as nebulous haze
seems antithetical to premise
couched, fixated, and interleaved
anchor rightly, viz
secular humanism inlays
votary visa versa entrees

shutterfly, snapchat twitter
comport comfortably situated
in  the catbird seat
as upon royal chaise
lounge steeped within
monastic hermetically ascetic ways
akin to daffodils got to puff the
magic dragon GoDaddy seed achieve
visibly absent pride and
prejudice where aggrieve
ving unseen, as careening

human bits believe
where forebears of Adam, and
the ants sandy dunes cleave
species pollination, yet devoid of
neither sense nor
sensibility that deceive
themselves philanthropic buttressed
by religious ethos, dogmas
credo, et cetera since Eve
to and fro, hither and yon
across the globe heave

infusing self importance
viz zit heady species
**** sapiens sans belief bold
lee granting superiority
to hundreds of generations
lapsed goo gilled descendants
of contemporary Primates cold,
and calculating dictatorial demagogues
(no matter dishabille disheveled) doled
out self importance
gussied up as kingpins,

whose braggadocio extolled
blood lust, depravity and egregious
on flip side of Manichaeism origami fold
touting faux grandeur measly
humans inherent self supremacy,
which mettle valuably wrought
more precious than gold
whereby might versus right
fostered iron gripped hold
trumping supreme cosmic
deity (if such exists,

per those, who ascribe existence
to divine creator),
where mankind didst
get special mold
where fictitious codified battlements
evinced luminary salient traits
if millennial forbears hypothetically polled
vis a vis virtue vindicates
vice viz lyrical tomes
such legendary mythological narratives as:
Aeneid, Don Juan,

Paradise Lost, The Divine Comedy,
Mahabharata, Beowulf,
Metamorphoses, The Odyssey,
Epic of Gilgamesh,
and The Iliad
displayed thunderous outrages
rectified violently rocked and rolled
where assignment throughout galaxy -
studded with malevolent
mailer daemons all told
informed terrestrial behavior,

decrees and formalities amidst wold
wide webbed skein tenuous
as gossamer wings
shutterfly at the speed of sound
albeit ergot size
solemn spores bumping,
commingling and jostling beings
whose demotic, erratic,
and frenetic vernacular
bumped uglies against
sacred talismanic wild things

while secular notions cursed
as intractably intolerable swings
per paradigms that disallowed rubric,
where autocratic stings
lashed out at pagan rites, which
when viewed from
surface where Earthlings
dwelt appeared as unpredictable
skittering dots with nary flings
perceived, but simply

near microscopic simians
crowning themselves as Kings
of Leon admonishing those
madding crowd source rings
of bright waters -
offering entertainment
to the invisible forces
within galactic realm
as mere antics of goslings.
Fifty nine inch tall wife
once willowy wisp
postmenopausal galloping gourmandiser
******* centerfold girly
figure ain't no mo,'
which superfluous weight deterrent,

love life yours truly
took Kamikaze nosedive
arousing, exciting, stimulating...
as romancing the stone statue,
but seen thru Tom
gobbler beady eyes

butterball babe resembles hottie
female turkey on steroids without feathers,
spouse already qualifies as Hen pecker
not admirable characteristic
to encourage physical intimacy
whew, which allows this husband

to redirect pro creative pursuits
where English language
beak homes muse,
which amateur philologist
attests to literary penchant
most likely garnering posthumous fame

revving up avast surge
necessitating Barry yore
to deter den of thieves
against stealing precious
documents - sold at auction
avid fans snapping up

bajillion tattered staind scribblings
indistinguishable from chicken scratch
interlaced with gobbledygook
(unbeknownst to John Doe
who faintly resembled me dead
drunken grizzled shabby skidrow

anonymous deceased wordsmith),
mortuary performed makeover
courtesy same Joseph and the
amazing technicolor dreamcoat
academy award winners
unexpected set couture club craze

suddenly everybody and their ilk
including grandmother goose, pink panther,
porky pig, Scoobie doobie do, ugly duckling...
triggered feverish buzz feeding frenzy
even cosmetic surgeons experienced
boomtimes, cuz ma

eternally sleeping pose
inspired cottage (cheesy) industry,
the global economy witnessed
unprecedented unsurge
ending world wide poverty.
easy access and proliferation of firearms,
     now begs a serious hard question
     presenting daunting task,
quite aware that passionate
     stalwart supporters of the NRA,

     embrace weaponry likened
     to garnering an Aboriginal trophy mask
(particularly in light of violent mass killings)
     immediately forces people

     of all stripes comprising this nation ask
quite aware of diametrically,
     jarringly, and politically
     doggedly entrenched fierce position
     each polarized stance challenges,

     especially when pitted
     against die hard proponents
     of the Second Amendment,
     who would sooner burn to ash,

and/or adopt a siege mentality
     glowering akin to red hot metal
     regaling opportunity asper Liberal heads to bash,
than relinquish (lock, stock and barrel)

     prized, coveted, and cherished cache
amassed collection of firearms
     permissible in accordance
     with (literal interpretation
     of Second Amendment

     of the United States Constitution)
     to mean no deterrent preclude
     (birth right to equip bare arms),
     deprivation against amassing a stockpile,

     would trigger an immediate saber flash
and instantaneously, another Civil War, would
     (with gnash of clenched jaws violently
     opposing manumission

     to release obedient snap, crackle
     pop in je nais sais quois *****), the provocation
     rendering revision, sans sacred covenant
     would sting whip lash

snuffing out any first and last hope to reconcile
divisive national issue
     with cool collected talking heads,
     cuz shoot at the hip diplomacy
     be loved American style,
that indomitable fighting
     esprit de corps tis fire in belly trial

though this skeptical and devout atheist,
     would welcome being proved wrong
generating the better angels to render obsolete strong
arm of the law as plucked harps evoke swan song

witnessing unbelievable savoir faire
     (forcing me to retract pessimism
     and willingly swallow my pride), minus long
time overdue, and negotiation
celebrated with tolling from a gong.
among the countless thugs
   that teased and taunted myself as a boy
who exhibited blatant characteristics
   of being painfully shy and coy
attempting to remain like a statue as a decoy
which tactic nada successful employ

but only incensed and beckoned
   like tasty morsel chronic unpleasant bait
to be pitted with words
   always feeling like an outcast
   (of poker flats) without a date
populating school memories
   of loathsomeness and hate

serving as token punching bag
   nearly the duration every year
of public school, which vicious name calling
   assaults upon me psyche did wear
away negligible self confidence,

   or internal rage that found instinct to veer
away from approaching fist,
   which knuckle sandwich from tier
of hooligans gave no surcease

   to knock this then introvert
   on his head or scrawny rear
a lonely lad bereft of any buddy
   to stand close as bona a fide genuine peer,

nothing but dark shadow
   casting silhouette
   per edge of night always near
one brazen dude named Lloyd Lavinsky

   hovered ever near
especially during recess
   at Audubon Elementary School
   he did chase and lear
encouraging mob fiends

   to join in an additionally mock and jeer
which unprintable epithets,
   I can still faintly hear
in tandem with that native animal fear

that found this then
   socially withdrawn second grader a targeted deer
caught in cross hairs of boys
   who seemed like giants
   and fierce some as a bear
clawing at a scared little boy
   plus hurtful words thru the air

which cruel barbs hurled lent convenience
   for me who stood stock still or crouched down
on ground intimating passivity
   and inferiority brought grimace and frown

to those who mimicked flaws,
   aside from being shriveled flower on lawn
included nasal twang
   from submucous cleft palate
   defect that did spawn

speech impediment and obvious magnet
   for brutal beast
to relish, savor and feast
hoping to bring me to tears at the least

knowing this human docile scared dog
   would not fight back
fearing he might get beat
   to a ****** pulp for justifiably flack

even my late mother also told me
   to give brats a “what for”
   with two ****** pack
that triceratops nasty gang

   bulging biceps they did pack
who to this very day I bristle to smack
with an ole mighty whack
as if strength within transferred
   to computer Goliath body guard
   manufactured by Univac.
---------------------------------------
postscript:

alth­ough just a infinitesimal dot
moxie this mortal doth got
in the cosmic skein since big bang hot
test event since white bread -

   gives m t calories a lot
soak up syrup from chicken soup
   from sterling gold chamber ***
strongly suggested by a tweeting scott.
(alternately titled: eye temporarily
lost sight of reason.)

Yesterday - March (7th) madness overtook me
toward she, yours truly did marry,
I nearly subjected mine flesh to harakiri.

Yours truly (earnestly and frankly)
got royally zapped!

Last night (exhibiting frolicsome mien),
she hurled an orange at lightspeed,
I yowled and yapped,
cuz red hotted poker raging anger wrapped
tightly around me psyche
wherein dark shadows
(think... a long edge of night) got trapped

as the edge of night (psychologically)
violently overtook mine ordinarily
calm, cool and collected
triggered reaction, whereby I nearly snapped
ready to **** a mockingbird named A* Robin
otherwise (and ofttimes) referenced as missus.

Her countenance turned ghostly white
Count Dracula summoned forth – think twilight
less than twenty four hours ago
to rectify paralyzing pernicious plight,
I wanted to learn the wife a life lesson
courtesy her tarnished rusty knight,
who plays fair and square
on the metaphorical chessboard of life
savoring bloodlust did excite.

Within flash doggone mailer daemon
(inside me noggin) became docile as a whelp.

After sense and sensibility returned,
I felt mortified at such murderous zeal
dumbfoundedly blinked
after dialing down the terrorizing wheel,
ceasing (once and for all)
poetic antics of generic schlemiel
hearty victuals for tri county newsreel

finding yours truly locked
even sentenced to life in prison
deadly rupture (regarding
motherless grown daughters)
time could never heal
self made widower for justice,
he would not appeal.

Urgency arises to air
aforementioned shellshock with Renee Cardone
the Springford therapist my soul I bare
lest yours truly could (hypothetically)
strapped (ohm my dog) to electric chair
despite no premeditation to declare

insanity - nasty, short and brutish existence
not forgivable courtesy loosed beast
prompting rhetorical question pertaining
to trying circumstances human err
well I could (lamely) blame outburst
on prominent solar flare

nsync with mine jammed cognitive gear
linkedin with rational thinking
necessitating appropriate healthcare
til death do me part
cue wizened old man holed
in walled dank lair

feeble minded kept within
jail cell hermitage amazingly enough
sixty plus shades of gray matter
offers yours truly ample time
to experience and/or accept personal prayer
and meditation reading, and playing solitaire.
Even as an old curmudgeon, aye pucker
and raspily suction, albeit toothless mouth
drawing reminiscent guffaws affecting
(think feeble attempt
impersonating plumber plunging -
unclogging backed up toilet),
flushed with satisfaction,
now snakes into following non sequitur,
whereby then upperclassman,
whose name Scott Lambert

I suddenly remembered
modest fellow one year my senior  
- donned tee shirt
“please support your local ******”
yes folks back in the day,
one long haired pencil neck geek
palled around with another
hirsute nerd - Roger Kummerer,
(who both of us graduated Methacton
High School class of 1977),

and yours truly readily
admitting, alluding, and attesting
without shadow of doubt
representing the dumber
than rocks of said rolling stones
foo fighting beastie boys
allied with Smokey and the bandits,
the latter donning outsize
particolored grey pachyderm trunks,
Tuscaloosa so far away;

especially as Mummer doth strut
on unseasonably warm New Year's Day
sporting polar bear look-alike
gabardine garb getup trumpeting,
merrily squeezing Charmin
rubbing her/his tuchus
excellently exhibiting posterior
as chief motormouth sound
of combo motorboat hummer.

Mein kampf elapsed distressfully
even now scores of decades later
ah..., the joys of amazingly aging gracefully
recalling happily never
being beat into pulp daily courtesy
imagine dragons saving me hide  
'though dimming sense and sensibility
before (appearing gratefully dead)
lifeless body dumped into gully,
nevertheless all the while fully
maintaining consciousness, and forcefully
summoning forth latent powers gleefully
choking living daylights masterfully

delivering just desserts upon Tom Viglione,
whose plaintive laments truthfully
resonate as blessed music
to ears unaccustomed hearing pitifully
sounding long overdue comeuppance
forever disbelieving wrongfully
perpetrated intimidating injustice
witnessed courtesy mine doppelgänger,
who wanted to strangle  
the m*r f*rs yearningly
fueling an ordinarily meek lad
only in his dreams, he envisions zestfully.

Pugnacious thuggish hooligans... although
decades long since elapsed,
whereby muscle bound hoodlums
jockeyed to rain
one after another verbal Hawaiian punch,
and bandied fist viz physical blow
threatening introverted diminutive boy
who, no surprise did eventually,
albeit (shamefacedly, sneakingly,
and stuntedly) didst grow

(as an aside resembled anorexic
Kris Kringle **... **... **...),
which long sleeved Santa suit
rendered invisible liver spots;      
said epidermal splotches black and indigo
wracked (in my pinion), impacted, and affected...,
this punster, he haint Joe
King, but upholds true value
nudging anonymous reader to chuckle
thru contrived written words y'know

good humor less or mo'
yours truly aspires toward po'
whit tree linkedin with infusing,
feebly, lamely, and quirkily
(no matter recognizing ex post facto)
impossible mission reporting punks to principal,
hence describing, envisioning, forsaking passivity
as defensive modus operandi status quo
finally freeing mine unsung
inner foreigner juke box hero.
Even as old curmudgeon, aye pucker
and raspily suction toothless mouth
drawing reminiscent guffaws affecting
attempt impersonating plumber
(think unclogging toilet)
please support your local ******

back in the day one
long haired pencil neck geeks palled
around with another
hirsute nerd - Roger Kummerer,
(who both of us graduated Methacton
High School class of 1977),
and yours truly readily

admitting, alluding, and attesting
without shadow of doubt
representing the dumber
than rocks of said beastie boys
bandits, donning particolored pachyderm
gabardine garb getup trumpeting,

especially as Mummer
on each New Year's Day
with bare *** tuchus
excellently imitating courtesy said orifice
(as chief motormouth) sound
of combo motorboat hummer.

Ah... the joys of amazingly aging gracefully
happily recalling never being beat into pulp dully
imagining dimming sense and sensibility
before (appearing gratefully dead)
lifeless body dumped into gully

nonetheless all the while fully
maintaining conscious, and forcefully
summoning forth latent powers gleefully
choking living daylights masterfully
delivering just desserts upon Tom Viglione,

whose plaintive laments truthfully
resonate as blessed music
to ears unaccustomed hearing pitifully
sounding long overdue comeuppance

forever disbelieving wrongfully
perpetrated injustice witnessed impossible mission
fueling an ordinarily meek lad
only in his dreams, he envisions zestfully.

Pugnacious thuggish hooligans... although
decades long since elapsed, whereby hoodlums
jockeyed to rain one after another verbal blow
threatening introverted diminutive boy

who, no surprise did eventually,
albeit (stuntedly) grow
(as an aside resembled anorexic
Santa Claus **... **... **...)

still wracked, impacted, affected...,
this punster, he haint Joe
King, but upholds valuable humor less or mo'
feebly, lamely, and quirkily aspires toward po'
whit tree linkedin with infusing,
(no matter ex post facto)
freeing mine unsung hero.
Even as old (dish) married
(spooning) curmudgeon,
who receives social security disability
linkedin with social anxiety)
chose the fork less traveled
aye pucker with sunken cheeks,
(especially without dentures)
and raspily suction toothless mouth
drawing reminiscent guffaws affecting
attempt impersonating plumber

(think unclogging toilet)
please support your local ******
back in the day one
long haired pencil neck geeks palled
around with another
hirsute nerd - Roger Kummerer,
(who both of us graduated Methacton
High School class of 1977),
and yours truly readily
admitting, alluding, and attesting

without shadow of doubt
representing the dumber
than rocks of said beastie boys
bandits, donning particolored pachyderm
gabardine garb getup trumpeting,
especially as Mummer
on each New Year's Day
with bare *** tuchus
excellently imitating courtesy said orifice
(as chief motormouth) sound
of combo motorboat hummer.

Ah... the joys of amazingly aging gracefully
happily recalling never being
beat into ****** pulp dully
imagining dimming sense and sensibility
before (appearing gratefully dead)
lifeless body dumped into gully
nonetheless all the while fully
maintaining conscious, and forcefully
summoning forth latent powers gleefully
choking living daylights masterfully

delivering just desserts upon Tom Viglione,
whose plaintive laments truthfully
resonate as blessed music
to ears unaccustomed hearing pitifully
sounding long overdue comeuppance
forever disbelieving wrongfully
perpetrated injustice
witnessed impossible mission
fueling an ordinarily meek lad
only in his dreams, he envisions zestfully.

Pugnacious thuggish hooligans... although
decades long since elapsed, whereby hoodlums
jockeyed to rain one after another verbal blow
threatening introverted diminutive boy
who, no surprise did eventually,
albeit (stuntedly) grow
(as an aside resembled anorexic
Santa Claus **... **... **...)
still wracked, impacted, affected...,
this punster, he haint Joe
King, but upholds valuable humor less or mo'
feebly, lamely, and quirkily aspires toward po'
whit tree linkedin with infusing,
(no matter ex post facto)
freeing mine unsung hero.
Asper myself tend
to occur late at night,
or early morn 'o follow
wing day unbeknownst
despite acute insight
how, when, where, why...

ideas swarm and bite
inspiration doth alight
try as I might to
coax, anchor right,
burning candlebox at
both ends during midnight

oil, and pry open hermetically airtight
noggin, where my poetic
(side) juices glommed up tight
blew silly blackened, and barbed
as though cold anthracite
ash coal lest futile effort

fueling mental cogs synaps (snaps),
sans each axon and dendrite,
and **** pinwheeling frenzied
writer's block won't budge,
no matter intense aghast fright
regarding drawing nothing,

but blank screen, an unpleasant sight
which activates greater fright
concentration stoppers appetite
to satiate agile literary skill
invoked with all mum might
encountering severe

resistance along well worn
nicked, pitted, rutted...
central processing unit abysmal sight
core cratered tracks analogous trite
other places blasted as if by dynamite
nanobot size infrastructure blight

hmm... huff frayed
to admit fifty plus shades
of grey pock marked beltway abustle
with at least bajillion
self important cosmopolite

avast friggin buzzfeed contrasted with bevy
of heavily rowdy, yet polite
sumo wrestlers exuding
spongy dimpled cellulite,
nonetheless grueling effort experienced
with craven half starved diabolical spite

undermining, jackknifing,
*******... literary endeavor to expedite
satisfactory pièce de résistance flight
of fancy, though challenged
every step of the way,

once ambition fired up...at twilight
as mortal passion
unstoppable to complete
crafting daily poem
kindled with emotional lignite!
Bloated swollen cheeks
analogous to first Chinese Brother,
who swallowed the sea,
now non sequitur
off beaten track i.e.
less apropos re: guarding
par for race course as if

ace driver won Grand Prix
latter referencing international
horse race for three-year-olds,
founded in eighteen sixty three
931 + 932 = above number
satisfying ghost of Fibonacci.

Original idea predicated whereby
all Americans heartily feast
(stuff themselves to the gills)
salivating cornucopia dime
a dozen lonely people
bemoaning holiday re:
traditional Thanksgiving time,
celebrating joie de vivre chime

wine glasses clink full house,
where ushers pantomime
proffer gobbledygook and
motion rapidly hungry guests
toward smorgasboard prime
tables for gluttonous
to commit punishing crime.

Tentative arrangement made,
whereby oldest sister, and husband,
(who live a jaunt away from Maple Shade
more precisely Woodbury New Jersey)
would swing by Schwenksville

comprising one car motorcade,
thence to shuttle 31.5 miles southeast
our mutual (of Omaha) friend,
I met when counted orbitz
during late 30/early thirtieth decade.

Offer to drive out of their way
presented, since our 2009
Hyundai Sonata did betray
accountability, dependability...
reliability oy vey
woolworth no more than

couple/few Benjamins
yet real challenge constitutes
yours truly, née
theme underlying mein
kampf pennilessness pray
I did (despite being orthodox

atheist) to no avail
relying upon social security
regarding disability (mine) Mayday
forthrightly, feebly, faintly...
calling before men
donned with white coats

came to take me away
to the happy home with trees
and flowers and chirping birds
and basket weavers who sit,
smile, twiddle their thumbs and toes.

Communication break down
compromised eating humble pie
regarding this ole man
upended above mentioned plan

whereby attending
hosted by: Gail la Dorfman
afforded ruber express
thus with Forrest Gump I ran
all across Ocean way thru to Japan.
offers his unsolicited tidbits
as scene courtesy
the following virtually
staged philosophical insight.

Arch back like
a professional ballet dancer
to stand out from other pedestrian applicants
seeking to fill my well-worn shoes
that fit my little feet.

Illuminate your soul
via modest communication
sans toe tilly tubular sole full insight
acquired thru being apprenticed
with storied prestigious law firm
of Anne Culle, Achilles Heale,
and Marathon Nike.

Keep your nose to the academic grindstone
despite the temptation
to appropriate the international family business
and graduation with supreme accolades
from one unnamed famous father.

He forsook frivolity per his peers
in exchange for a stock reputation
of gentility honesty, and integrity
despite his humble roots
as the only male heir
of a Middle Eastern European
Jewish mother and father.

They scrimped, saved and sacrificed
scarce resources to set the stage
for this scion of well-deserved
fame and fortune.

Never forget those grandparents
whose adherence to work their fingers
to the bone (literally)
allowed, enabled and provided
this founding partner
per the trio of stalwart attorneys
for the underdogs
of the World Wide Web.

Match deeds with credo
of obedience to the law
of the land, as epitomized
by Abraham Lincoln.

Such obeisance to a democratic dogma
will be firm stepping-stones
to engender and kindle with tinder loving care
an Amazon zone of cathartic karma
from paternal persona.

Such acquiescence toward morals
of the conscience
(and remembrance of previous generations
blood, sweat and tears)
will serve as intrinsic manna
for clients to clamor
like an unstoppable rolling stone
to seek counsel from one
whose genuine heartfelt equalitarian demeanor
a near perfect recipe for satisfaction
for helping others smooth out
jagged abutments arising in their lives.

Rather than lecture and command
with a dictatorial cutthroat reign of terror
(as casually espoused in “The Prince”
by Machiavelli), this democratic,
humanistic, liberal minded
torchbearer of justice advises
active listening (as advocated
by the late Jean Dole,
my renown mentor
from Lima, Pennsylvania),
inculcating intuitive posturing
toward delivering random acts of kindness.

This includes offer services pro bono
if an individual, family, municipality,
et cetera appears copacetic
yet struggles against insurmountable
odds from the laugh-in fickle finger of fate.

Exemplify by example of zeal
for the underdog
(immersed in some catastrophic series
of unfortunate events – cue Lemony Snicket)
that money need not be demanded
before the welfare of the downtrodden
(sic – such as the fictitious Harns Family
from Penn Valley –
who live among the wealthiest people,
yet feel like outcasts of Poker Flats)
from the mere exuberance
of witnessing an ear to ear
smile of gratitude.

Rather than be biased,
inclined to be prejudiced
based on cursory observations
of one or many barely clinging
to the life raft of survival,
I (as a humble human)
encourage a relationship of trust
before casting an indiscriminate eye
toward those less fortunate
to live in the lap of luxury.

Luck (or the lack thereof)
an invisible yet potent additive
to this mix for those flush
with disposable income or exiled
to a hand to mouth hardscrabble dilemma.

Daily acknowledgement for
ethnic, genetic and quixotic
dice throw of chance in tandem
with loving support of immediate
kith and kin instrumental in keeping
in check bombastically egotistical,
haughtily radical degradation
of fixation of values steeped
in appreciation of aesthetics, beauty,
charm, decency, equality
from gifts hoed inside.

Joyfulness keeps love moving
needling offset predilections.

Quality rests squarely
upon the pillars of staying
within the bounds of service
to those less able bodied or beset
with untold obstacles that discourage
setting virtue (or the closest approximation
of what that means
to the inquiring mind)
as precedent to blaze a trail
of care and concern.

Always maintain benevolent devotion
forswearing greediness.

Invoke keepsake mandating
omnipotent natural personal righteousness
to vaccinate yourself against
heinous, nefarious, pernicious,
et cetera rapacious
trapdoors of selfishness.

*Hing or heeng is the Hindi word for asafetida (sometimes spelled asafoetida). It's also been known as the devil's dung and stinking gum, as well as asant, food of the gods, jowani badian, hengu, ingu, kayam, and ting. It is a dark brown, resin-like substance that is derived from the root of ferula.
offers his unsolicited tidbits
as scene courtesy
the following virtually
staged philosophical insight.

Arch back like
a professional ballet dancer
to stand out from other pedestrian applicants
seeking to fill my well-worn shoes
that fit my little feet.

Illuminate your soul
via modest communication
sans toe tilly tubular sole full insight
acquired thru being apprenticed
with storied prestigious law firm
of Anne Culle, Achilles Heale,
and Marathon Nike.

Keep your nose to the academic grindstone
despite the temptation
to appropriate the international family business
and graduation with supreme accolades
from one unnamed famous father.

He forsook frivolity per his peers
in exchange for a stock reputation
of gentility honesty, and integrity
despite his humble roots
as the only male heir
of a Middle Eastern European
Jewish mother and father.

They scrimped, saved and sacrificed
scarce resources to set the stage
for this scion of well-deserved
fame and fortune.

Never forget those grandparents
whose adherence to work their fingers
to the bone (literally)
allowed, enabled and provided
this founding partner
per the trio of stalwart attorneys
for the underdogs
of the World Wide Web.

Match deeds with credo
of obedience to the law
of the land, as epitomized
by Abraham Lincoln.

Such obeisance to a democratic dogma
will be firm stepping-stones
to engender and kindle
an Amazon zone of cathartic karma
from paternal persona.

Such acquiescence toward morals
of the conscience
(and remembrance of previous generations
blood, sweat and tears)
will serve as intrinsic manna
for clients to clamor
like an unstoppable rolling stone
to seek counsel from one
whose genuine heartfelt equalitarian demeanor
a near perfect recipe for satisfaction
for helping others smooth out
jagged abutments arising in their lives.

Rather than lecture and command
with a dictatorial cutthroat reign of terror
(as casually espoused in “The Prince”
by Machiavelli), this democratic,
humanistic, liberal minded
torchbearer of justice advises
active listening (as advocated
by the late Jean Dole,
my renown mentor
from Lima, Pennsylvania),
inculcating intuitive posturing
toward delivering random acts of kindness.

This includes offer services pro bono
if an individual, family, municipality,
et cetera appears copacetic
yet struggles against insurmountable
odds from the fickle finger of fate.

Exemplify by example of zeal
for the underdog
(immersed in some catastrophic series
of unfortunate events)
that money need not be demanded
before the welfare of the downtrodden
(sic – such as the Harns Family
from Penn Valley –
who live among the wealthiest people,
yet feel like outcasts of Poker Flats)
from the mere exuberance
of witnessing an ear to ear
smile of gratitude.

Rather than be biased,
inclined to be prejudiced
based on cursory observations
of one or many barely clinging
to the life raft of survival,
I (as a humble human)
encourage a relationship of trust
before casting an indiscriminate eye
toward those less fortunate
to live in the lap of luxury.

Luck (or the lack thereof)
an invisible yet potent additive
to this mix for those flush
with disposable income or exiled
to a hand to mouth hardscrabble dilemma.

Daily acknowledgement for
ethnic, genetic and quixotic
dice throw of chance in tandem
with loving support of immediate
kith and kin instrumental in keeping
in check bombastically egotistical,
haughtily radical degradation
of fixation of values steeped
in appreciation of aesthetics, beauty,
charm, decency, equality
from gifts hoed inside.

Joyfulness keeps love moving
needling offset predilections.

Quality rests squarely
upon the pillars of staying
within the bounds of service
to those less able bodied or beset
with untold obstacles that discourage
setting virtue (or the closest approximation
of what that means
to the inquiring mind)
as precedent to blaze a trail
of care and concern.

Always maintain benevolent devotion
forswearing greediness.

Invoke keepsake mandating
omnipotent natural personal righteousness
to vaccinate yourself against
heinous, nefarious, pernicious,
et cetera rapacious
trapdoors of selfishness.
years gone by now with a ****
constituting one garden variety generic goof
bolle yours truly sprawled himself aloof

The celebrated sailing frog
     from Montgomery County
     went a court'n, or so the tale iz toad
to a grand ole mansion built around 1910,
     and e'en 'pon

     being razed ~2012 ah no dummy
     sea worthiness still plainly showed,
twas February 28th, 1968,
     when my father
     bought the house at 324 Level Road

majority thrice score plus deux years,
     rush back with unfettered exuberant zeal
this aging elf spent psalm tranquil
     May days sung sotto voce
     atop memorialized, prized,

     shingled out, ship-shape valued,
     venerated, vip voted faux ****** demesne
     "Glen Elm" named private
     100+ acre wooded common weal

many a pitch perfect spring day
     found yours truly
     frankly basking atop the spacious roof
oft times begging the cosmic force

     irrationally lyft ting this Earthlinked bing,
     this uber dreamer (uplyfted Dharma) ***
     willingly taken with "****"
(magic amazing dragons)
     presuming my absence,
     would not be missed and whereabouts
     no cause for alarm,
     but the usual antics of a contemplative goof

ball, and aware
     a minor for hair (Sunkist) gold
Helios innocently beckoned,
     this then sole Sol tanned
     within the solar raised fold
surrendering while atop
     the multi acred roof where any cold
melted away, whence became bathed
     like a bronze statue of auld.

Zip pose zing the weather forecast
     donned wafted air
fragrant with flowered flora
     visibility for miles
     if ether crystal clear,
this high da way countless yards
     off the ground presented flare
approximating pristine floral display
     with powerfully poignant immunity
     against cackling, jeering, scowling,

     parents or other nemesis with glare
ring (smoke emitting nostrils),
     an idyll escape for this heir
to the throne of the mountain king,
     (lion share of original tract
     kept by Donald Neilson empire)
     this make believe verdant submerged lair
unwittingly left a gaping hole,

     when Gambone Brothers
     industrial machinery voraciously
     made clean sweep,
     without a trace of former imp pier
     real resilient stately structured heart
     of "Glen Elm" could no longer rear

the well built “grand Etta face dame”  
     helplessly, holistically humbly
     brought to her knees (gory detail aye will spare),
nonetheless more than one pearl jammed shaped tear

trickled down chafed
     sad reddened cheeks,
     whose head must veer
away asper thine subsequently
     blotted out never never never land

     eclipsed by transient rubble,
     thence vinyl city (dis) graced sacred space,
no doubt a great ache,
     when Saint Nick sought
     sought in vain for
     324 Templed throne everywhere!
re: visited today April 12th, 2023

Way before aye knew
the name Fletcherism applied
family and friends even the bartered bride
would (tongue in cheek) chide
tummy uncommonly (recherché) atypical dyed
ded if the letter “y” one did elide
in the wool feeding
and/or slaking thirst guide
did precepts sans hungry
deaf eating beast impossible to hide

(the ferocious growling harassing imp -
armed to the figurative teeth ready to pounce
viz casus belli sans reeling off
a pseudo say id dish us vicious jeremiad
me, this unrepentant conscientious masticator,
who re: lied
on self control unbeknownst
to this pumpkin eater
(me not named Peter)
unwittingly followed

the basic tenet of Fletcherism - custom made
modus operandi vis a vis exercising okayed
mandibular metered (when famished),
eyes kept closed while tongue gently played
adhered to practice of eating small amounts,
which discipline stayed
engorging self, and as a result
(consuming sustenance
only when hungry avoiding
(wolfing like an instantaneous blitzkrieg flash)
found me aware visa vis master car ding
marginal increase in pounds meaning
thy body electric weighed

approximately for long stretches
to enable safe passage for sturdy brigs
when a habitue at one or another dining digs
stuffed nibbling on hors d'oeuvre figs
adequately satiating with with oomf
when contra dance caller Scott Higgs
announced "hands four," which signal
helped get my mojo back
and reel lee deuce home jigs,
which indeed kickstarted and syncopated,
oft times espying Bobby Riggs
who years gone back **** Vic Tory huss
e'en when donning apparel of Whigs
like colluding trumpetting molecules
that via tiff ***** doth zags and zigs.
(preface to constipation)

way before aye knew
the name Fletcherism applied
tummy uncommonly (recherché) atypical dyed
in the wool feeding and/or slaking thirst guide

did precepts sans hungry
deaf eating beast impossible to hide
(the ferocious growling harassing imp -
armed to the figurative teeth ready to pounce
viz casus belli sans reeling off

a pseudo say id dish us vicious jeremiad
me, this unrepentant conscientious masticator,
who re: lied
on self control unbeknownst
to this pumpkin eater
unwittingly followed

the basic tenet of Fletcherism - custom made
modus operandi vis a vis exercising okayed
mandibular metered (when famished),
eyes kept closed while tongue gently played

adhered to practice of eating small amounts,
which discipline stayed
engorging self, and as a result
(consuming sustenance

only when hungry avoiding
(wolfing like an instantaneous blitz krieg flash)
found me aware visa vis master car ding
marginal increase in pounds meaning
thy body electric weighed

approximately for long stretches
when a habitue at one or another dining digs
stuffed nibbling on hors d'oeuvre figs
adequately satiating with with oomf

when contra dance caller Scott Higgs
announced "hands four," which signal
helped get my mojo back
and reel lee deuce home jigs,
which kickstarted, syncopated,

oft times espying Bobbie Riggs
who years gone back **** Vic Tory huss
e'en when donning apparel of Whigs
like colluding trump petting molecules
that via tiff ***** doth zags and zigs.
re: visited tonight October 15th, 2021

Way before aye knew
the name Fletcherism applied
tummy uncommonly (recherché) atypical dyed
in the wool feeding and/or slaking thirst guide

did precepts sans hungry
deaf eating beast impossible to hide
(the ferocious growling harassing imp -
armed to the figurative teeth ready to pounce
viz casus belli sans reeling off

a pseudo say id dish us vicious jeremiad
me, this unrepentant conscientious masticator,
who re: lied
on self control unbeknownst
to this pumpkin eater
(me not named Peter)
unwittingly followed

the basic tenet of Fletcherism - custom made
modus operandi vis a vis exercising okayed
mandibular metered (when famished),
eyes kept closed while tongue gently played

adhered to practice of eating small amounts,
which discipline stayed
engorging self, and as a result
(consuming sustenance

only when hungry avoiding
(wolfing like an instantaneous blitzkrieg flash)
found me aware visa vis master car ding
marginal increase in pounds meaning
thy body electric weighed

approximately for long stretches
when a habitue at one or another dining digs
stuffed nibbling on hors d'oeuvre figs
adequately satiating with with oomf

when contra dance caller Scott Higgs
announced "hands four," which signal
helped get my mojo back
and reel lee deuce home jigs,
which indeed kickstarted and syncopated,

oft times espying Bobby Riggs
who years gone back **** Vic Tory huss
e'en when donning apparel of Whigs
like colluding trump petting molecules
that via tiff ***** doth zags and zigs.
(Idea birthed, engendered, and germinated
from Lombok Indonesia earthquakes
On 5 August 2018,
a destructive and shallow earthquake
measuring Mw 6.9
(ML 7.0 according to BMKG)
struck the island
of Lombok, Indonesia),
rendering Johnny on the spot,
Jack of all trades able, eager,
ready, and willing to rig up

much sought after jakes,
which swash buckling evinced  
by Mother Earth makes
civilians mercilessly rocked,
and rolled far only a blink
of eye as ground shakes
if superstitious, one proselytized
that a monster wakes.

Nary a ***** of illumination pierces thru
thick cavernous rock solid chamber home
to this crepuscular anchorite,
who spent untold countless chunks of time
holed up deep underground
initially to escape deadly blight,
that afflicted vast swaths of
twenty first century
long fostered civilization,
the post apocalyptic scattered remnants

forced into subterranean redoubts
reliant on stowed away tallow
uber wax to forge poorly guided
niggardly flickering burning candlelight
where quotidian ritual entails doth dight
this Jainist Joplin ascetic, who
already donned the mantle,
sans adjustment to
darkened myopic eyesight
imposing keen aural habituation

to discern, and distinguish any fright
full scurrying, skittering,
slithering, unseen presence
triggering thine nostril to sneeze,
which nasal (gesundheit) claxon
serves to scarify
author who doth ghostwrite
shadowy silhouetted height
giving infinitesimal pause,
thence worry free insight

since my judicious jumbled
juxtaposed metaphorical jacklight
philosophies, viz Jainism, Jesuit,
and Judeo-Christian allows
no cavil, indiscriminate killing,
nor **** sapien superiority
toward multitudinous life forms instilled
into former existence
as good Samson Knight,
now effectively embedded,

entombed, and interred
within bowels of the Earth
over eons metamorphosed into lignite
millenniums later human
canticle for Leibowitz written
(a big beautiful mess) refrains
from conveying petrifying, mortifying,
and horrifying dystopian future)
softly enunciating such psalms

disappointingly strives to wield might
to eternal night,
whereat those buried alive
unjustly condemned to perdition plight
enduring a slow torturous death - quite
as muffled cries weakly
lament, this haint right
name one reasonable rhyme
trumpeting as supreme sight.
(Idea engendered from Lombok earthquake: Indonesia)

Nary a ***** of illumination pierces thru
thick cavernous rock solid chamber home
     to this crepuscular anchorite,
who spent untold countless chunks of time
holed up deep underground

     initially to escape deadly blight,
that afflicted vast swaths of
twenty first century
     long fostered civilization,
the post apocalyptic scattered remnants
forced into subterranean redoubts
reliant on stowed away tallow

uber wax to forge poorly guided
niggardly flickering burning candlelight
where quotidian ritual entails doth dight
this Jainist Joplin ascetic, who
     already donned the mantle,
     sans adjustment to darkened eyesight
imposing keen aural habituation

     to discern, and distinguish any fright
full scurrying, skittering,
     slithering, unseen presence
     triggering thine nostril to sneeze,
     which nasal (gesundheit) claxon
serves to scarify shadowy silhouetted height

giving infinitesimal pause,
     thence worry free insight
since my judicious jumbled
     juxtaposed metaphorical jacklight
philosophies, viz Jainism, Jesuit,
     and Judeo-Christian allows
     no cavil, indiscriminate killing,
nor **** sapien superiority

toward multitudinous life forms instilled
     into former existence as good Samson Knight,
now effectivel embedded,
     entombed, and interred
     within bowels of the Earth
hum canticle refrains
     softly enunciating such psalms
     to eternal night.
Truth be told said topic minimally embellished
rather, prattling youthful looking
baby booming geezer
precious time (yours), he doth bilk
(cue sinister mock-up halloween voice)

moost valuable intangible
outstripping fine spun golden silk,
yet coronavirus (COVID-19) quarantine
drives dingbat to whole new level
wits end where sonar helps sound out his ilk.

Think me swallowing, gulping, and asphyxiating
essential experiencing ill humor versus zest
suddenly impossible mission life and death quest
in short oxygen with air supply
depleted blame climate change
analogous to getting trachea

severely pelted, pinched, pressed
nevertheless, I limber twigs to build a nest
simultaneously (choking, gagging, and laughing)
appeasing the impractical joker within/without
lame impersonation suave debonair beau geste
and pardon following hyperbole expressed.

More onerous (ha) to parish priests
tendering, regarding and administering last rites
aforementioned "fake" dead serious claim,
one little known prevaricator doth attest
(nip pulling excess milk of human kindness)

faux (pas and mine late ma)
gaming altruism confessed
***** deeds done dirt cheap
hypothetically earning devout resuscitator
invoking divine intervention
upon impious hackneyed poetaster brownie points.

Now fur heal, aye really gotta
get get something off me chest
flagrant exaggerated golden opportunity analogous,
videre licet his achievements or service to country

warrants life experiences to entail electronic knighthood,
and/or his female counterpart secularly baptized
bitta bing bitta bang fiber optically blessed
communication courtesy poetry offers level best
modality as ye will subsequently attest.

Here, now be my (virtual and/ augmented) guest
to experience former don requisite paraphernalia
quite sophisticated electronics even average
Luddite would be impressed
i.e. headsets loaded with gyroscopes and other
sensors to track movements and similar

accouterments for latter lest
please take swig and/or slug at my behest,
yours truly boasts nutritious 100% vegan zest,
oh... afterwards use greensleeve (mine), I jest
to wipe tell tale residue (i.e. milk mustache)
off your mug that gulped
farce syrup passing electric kool aid acid taste test.

Earlier today (April 18th, 2020)
a novel notion came into mine pate
to craft poem regarding titled subject
i.e. fyi Google Califia Farms
satisfactorily to investigate

or visit https://www.califiafarms.com/ to satiate
curiosity a boot plant based healthy drink to locate
nearest purveyor, an
immediate convert ye will become
preaching the gospel gushing enthusiasm will not abate
subsequently yours truly
able, eager, ready and willing to debate.
Dante's Inferno chokes breathable air
fiery flames fuel
     state of emergency
     president did declare
despite his disclaimer global warming
     "FAKE," no matter glare
ring obvious indisputable proof, nonetheless,
     the commander in chief

     blatantly doth jeer
and doubles down ‘bad
     environmental laws’ mare
reed with water
     shortage explains conflagration,
     oh...,and while he takes
     a knee in prayer
(re: home companion fashion)

     Thee Oaf blithely vouchsafes
     courtesy, sans colorful swear
words plus (purportedly,
     unbeknownst to him
     marijuana laced powder milk biscuits
     giving him courage - er chutzpah
     as if he needed any) to veer
way off script of late spluttering, spouting,

     and even spewing outrageous claims
     that (YES) extraterrestrials rank as chief
     villainous figures as
     nonpareil arsonists this year.
This Lake Woe
     begone Wharton warrior
     no stranger to attribute blame,
where unidentified flying objects

     affected intergalactic collusion
(hare brained scheme hatched,
     engineered, and brooded
     while holed away in his
     Trump Taj Mahal) from
     outer limits of
     twilight zone) fair game,
not averse to accuse

     Norwegian bachelor farmers
     falsely, and even
     Grimm folklore characters,
     not outrageous to name,
he will continue to repeat falsehoods,
     and later subsequently quote
    himself without shame!
(the smoker you are,
the drinker you get -
never vouchsafed by this
ill eagle non substance
nor amber liquids
of the dogs imbiber).

as a mathematical abbot
weeding thru bathroom rag
i.e. regular toilet tissue paper
prior to completing important
private business matter

on the sacred porcelain chamber ***
more revered than the king’s throne
molded from a gold ingot
which the heady Mary Jane
made more than hit token appearance
and quaffing
inxs of one hundred proof shot,

Nonetheless, boy gnome hatter
her inebriated state,
she still looked smoke kin hot
asking if I wanna marry
her attired in drag
at a joint where ****

banged on by the hands
of a phenomenal drummer
taut as a hemp knot
with music in his blood
while blowing fractal rings –
holy marcal scott

the immediate utterance
and rather creative bon mot
found me stock still
like stone wall Jackson,
who unfortunately got shot

unwittingly by his own
(confederate troops),
whose demise an awful blot
per the southern cause
during the civil war

and if anachronism
to receive medicinal aide
available instead
of primitive treatment he got

as well as other wounded soldiers
of misfortune on the battlefield
whose faith the any almighty
power could do little to save their lot,

yet availing my imagination
to twist time like that mobius strip
mortally wounded Rebels
and Yankees free from
facing death on a cot

might be successful hemp
entrepreneurs cultivating a little spot
of land hemp would outstrip
cotton as king as export to trot
back to lady gaga who

scorches throats yet delivers bagged
illicit goodies with bo diddly squat
narcotic as sweet
as savory kumquat
palliative that hits the spot.
(cuz ma life iz such a drag...
this **** kin “FAKE” hemp  
pyre aye roll out to you dear reader).

As a double jointed mathematical abbot
and amateur chemist
   specializing in cannabinoids
   my favorite delta-9-tetra
   hydrocannabinol (THC),

   isolated and synthesized in 1964
weeding thru bathroom rag
   while athwart the *****
   i.e. measuring adequate perforated
   square roto root er, sans
   regular toilet tissue paper
   prior to completing important

   private business matter
   on the sacred porcelain chamber ***
Mary Jane made a token appearance,
   and boy she looked smoke kin hot
asking if I wanna marry (Jane) her attired
   in drag at a joint where Billy ****  

   banged on by the hands of
   a phenomenal drummer
   taut as a hemp knot
with music in his blood
   while blowing  fractal rings – holy Scott
the immediate utterance,

   and rather creative bon mot
found me stock still like stone wall Jackson,
   who unfortunately got deprived a hit,
   nonetheless got shot
unwittingly by his own (confederate troops),
   whose demise an awful blot

per southern cause during
   the Civil War and if anachronism
   to receive medicinal aide available
   instead of primitive treatment he got
(as well other wounded soldiers
   of misfortune on the battlefield),

   whose faith the any almighty power
   could do little to save their roach invested lot
yet availing my imagination
   to twist time like that Mobius strip
mortally wounded rebels and Yankees
   free from facing death on a cot
might be successful hemp

   entrepreneurs cultivating a little spot
of land hemp would outstrip cotton
   as king as export to trot
orange you glad I avoided
   the analogy with a kumquat?
Squarely conscientious, I unwittingly
sanction selfhood acutely triangulate
courtesy webbed geometry jeopardize,
galvanize pluck nudging contrived arc,
virtually courting temptation aware,

sans impetuousness compromises an
anonymous commingling, nonetheless
electronic fraternization enthralls mine
plucky chutzpah possibility intrigues
yours truly sporting impish grinning

smile across world wide web unsure
quasi cryptic communication decrypted
maybe imperfectly interpreting message
this enamored disembodied spirit doth
chance circling foursquare kibitizing

downplaying grand illusion spontaneity
gist ripples thru this human entity while
comfortably cushioned buffered against
disappointment accepting outcome - par
for the course amidst cyber spatial gulf

nothing ventured brings disappointment
more often than not, this solitary fellow,
a beetle browed fool on the hill smarting
over...he ne'er gathered rosebuds fruitless
ruing foregone opportunities, hence tho'

cocooned against adverse outcome revel
at fleeting giddiness affixing envisioned
smile upon unknown reader, or perchance
another veritable stranger, cuz amiability
need not be sole providence aimed at one
select web surfer, but extended warm free

greeting permissible allow one imperfect
troubadour to sprinkle pleasantries to any
person, whose scrolling intersects with my
genuine not "FAKE" aery mission to offer
abiding friendship e'en if limited to realm
of harmonized synthesized online reality.
(alternately titled: jump starter for clunky, *****,
quirky, xyz mechanic wanted in tow tow -
chassis what I mean?)

As the proud graduated
honorably rolled 2009 Hyundai
Sonata vehicular property
belonging to a mister
and missus Matthew Harris
(fifty shades of gray

if that makes any difference),
I experience nervous
rack and pinion quaking
shimmying, whining, and zipping
also twittering, shuttering,
linkedin kickstarting powertrain

even before chugging,
huffing, puffing, spewing...
like magic dragon along boulevard
of broken automotive debris
regarding upcoming
emission/inspection

due before stroke of midnight
August 31st, 2019
last year this time...
aye yie yie...
oil my pan, a major overhaul
comprising driver side suspension

engendered shock,
I...could not absorb
even now, yours truly strut er ers...,
and doth recoil scary undertaking
smattering of months thereafter,
(I wheely cannot engine ear

recalling exact amount of time)
what in the name of... car nation...
then... driver side rear brake assembly
required replacement
giving said owners run off
Golden Gate Bridge for their

newfound moneyless rendered situation
(ex post facto new battery got installed)
sorry to zap at greased lightning speed
and (mane lee) take lion's share
of social security electronic deposit,
(what with fuel tank filler ups,

and insurance - no matter
Nationwide always on my side)
understandable decent folks
would prefer to steer me
off cliff side, but
my dear friend SEPTA

doth not cam into hinterland
namely Schwenksville, Pennsylvania,
thus imposing prohibitive dollars
tooling them around
mainly medical appointments,
cuz at ten plus years old,

and odometer clicking away...
mechanical malfunction,
could diesel lee, axle dent tully
risk life and limb,
thus park my exhausted words
this fellow gas guzzling,

motoring, rotating tire
screeching hot rods...
ole clunker auto know,
but hates tappet cob Bosch,
and get cha piston off...,
but tread carefully,
and curry big stick shift.
In steed of ye
     mounting your stock
key high horse,
     perhaps named Rock
Key, and head off...lock

stock and barrel,
     who knows where,
     now lemme seat chew wait
ma self, and quickly knock
out quick mention about

     hour (meaning everybody
     within the wide world),
     and their webbed
     warp and woof weave
courtesy of Father Time

analogously to a ****
key hunkering down
     aiming tubby first
     crossing finish line
     at races, afterwards celebrate

     with social feted outing, while
     scheduling proctologist appointment,
et cetera, sans squeezing
     late radio talk ad hoc
meeting, an

     extemporaneous yet timely
     lesson indirectly related
to bird *******, i.e. migrating
     fast as Glock
     pistol can shoot, essentially

sound (garden) resembling
     joyus honking flock
of seagulls heading
Southside Johnny
     and Asbury Jukes,

     and on Tortoise -
     to sea dock
side of the moon
     Pink Floyd attired as Teenage
     Mutant Ninja Turtle,
    
     whose schedule Nsync
     with YES men hosting
     showtime merely minutes away...
remember ring that char existence
     enslaved to thee a bomb

     been nibble atomic clock,
which device uses an electron
transition frequency went
sallying forth in
     the microwave tent,

experiencing optical radiation pent
up ether, or ultra
     violet region meant
for electromagnetic fervent
active spectrum, or Palestra event

of atoms comprising
     Adam and the Ants
     (as well all other matter)
     linkedin to frequency standard for
     timekeeping Strunk and White
     element of style.
Pennilessness shadows black
unemployment endless track
rails tie-er less lee when dumbly staring
overdrawn account issues
   another clattering smack.

Income pleat undergraduate degree
contributed to the role of a sporadic employee
time to acquire handy dandy blues clues key
lost within vacillating undermining spree.

Mental state can be a precarious widget-like thing
directly at the whim of financial sliding swing
self-destruction demonic ring
courtesy of pauperism
delivers the destructive poisoned scorpion sting.

Immortal force of please hear my cry
provide support while
   under the sheltering sky
steady (just out of reach)
   sought income bolster up high

mirage vision brings transient delight
to this great (former
Civil War Yankee) supreme guy.

If no breakthrough I do not foresee
charity not for profit (but only prophet) I will bee
and this blurb carved outside my cave-like hovel
many moons and break of the day find me

imploring existential vagaries this baby boomer
sans middle-aged man who hankers to be free
thus though aye to be a schnorrer

who scrounges parking lots for scattered change
yet...decries blubbering the beggar's credo
write out a check and mail to me.

Philanthropic persons
   may rightfully balk and get irate
at such brazen plea to squelch
   ma pecuniary financial state

yet where the crossroads of mine future
most likely crop up which
would cause far a tete a tete
meanwhile, stoicism bids me wait...

For Godot, Curly, Shemp, or Moe
the stand-in for a Stool Pigeon
or even an odd antagonist
   or protagonist dreamt
   by Edgar Allan Poe.
Even when iron not red hot,
I implement non customary quarks
regarding foreigner rather cold as ice
namely delinquent outsize credit card debt
mandates yours truly,
a cheesy survivor who rem: members
putting freeze on
Citizens Bank World MasterCard accounts,
whose helplessness to fork over

substantial dollar figure
analogous to one of three blind mice,
who ran after the farmer's wife
She cut off tails (OUCH!)
with a carving knife
must pay the price
methinks food in the slammer (ha)
will lack sugar and spice,
nevertheless macht schnell trice.

I exhaled deep sigh of relief
after speaking over the telephone,
whereby Arcadia Recovery Bureau
(i.e. collection agency)
based in Reading, Pennsylvania
explained yours truly owed $23.21
which considerably alleviated
immediate dire straits that figuratively
grabbed me by the nuts
hash tagged self scoundrel
a day late dollar short
dollars to donuts bonafide klutz

living ****** mint procreative
seminal squirt biological reproduction,
could never conceive to abort
despite countless occasions,
I blithely admit characteristics
linkedin with being a putz
going off rails as a one man train wreck
mine impossible mission to avoid
NOT running amok imagine
bull in a china shop
whereby the hypothetical proprietor
willing, ready able to tear out my guts.

Pigeon toed, I trip over me own little feet
size nine shoe small size for grown man
leaving utter disaster in his wake
synonymous when havoc strikes
chaos theory alive and well
ensues when I walk about
and dare take even one baby step.

Ever since adept with ability to crawl,
I ofttimes tumbled down the stairs,
but never did shed tears nor bawl
e'en when taking nosedive head first did fall
out the hatch of airplane

splattered, plastered, and matted
think suddenly feeling comfortably numb
joist another brick in wall
nevertheless acquiring stunt man role
paid big bucks

as **** sapien disguised as Sasquatch
(cause unkempt harried styled hair)
more times than I can remember
fell to Earth minus parachute,
which hoop fully explains

the incomprehensible drawl
earnestly and frankly harkening language
once extant within Gaul
which reverberated inside hall
of mountain (lionized) king.

Prior to any madcap misadventure
yours truly envisions his clumsiness
plays out within my third eye blind
hilarious scenario unfolds in slow motion
whereby accidental flick of wrist,
barely brushes up against
flimsy clothes rack

(the original motive begetting poem)
knee **** involuntary reaction,
kicking obstacle clear across Compton
generating comical feedback loop
impossible mission to stop
blockchain of fateful bitcoin events.

Living amidst (amongst) disarray
courtesy the missus, whose domestic habits
never merit housekeeping seal of approval
twenty four/seven pose
a hazard to mine existence.
Steely Dan sing queen (me)
outdid himself on sixtieth anniversary
after Grahame Wood
determined to meet
the evolving needs of the community
opened the first Wawa Food Market
in Folsom, PA, on April 16, 1964.

Today marked the sixth decade
since George Wood started
the Wawa dairy in 1902,
and it quickly became
a trusted name for fresh,
quality dairy.

As an unsung Patrons of said store,
I strove to achieve mitzvah
for an incapacitated wheelchair bound
resident here at Highland Manor Apartments.

The fickle finger (hut) of fate
unknowingly planned to liquidate
honest to dog sincere intentions
to deliver said drinkable goods
(you can bet your bottom dollar)
on his sterling promise
never foreseeing disastrous
misadventure out ranking
starry eyed bespectacled klutz
comprising the heart of this poem at any rate
(nitty gritty details omitted),
but essentially and summarily
spilled contents from three
twenty ounce cups of hotly perked coffee    
scalding himself in the process,
where epithets spewed
inadequately served at X-rate.

I asked him if he liked coffee
cuz today aforementioned vendor
acknowledged the brainchild
offering buzzfeeding caffeinated brew free
American chain of convenience stores
and gas stations originating
in the Philadelphia metropolitan area,
and now located along the East Coast
of the United States,
operating in Pennsylvania, New Jersey,
Delaware, Maryland, Virginia,
Washington, D.C., and Florida.

The remaining lines of this reasonable rhyme
garnered courtesy an endeavor
attempted quite some years ago
attempt bordering on the ridiculous to the sublime.

Even when iron not red hot,
I implement non customary quirks
regarding going for broke into survivor mode  
asia foreigner rather cold as ice
namely delinquent outsize credit card debt
mandates yours truly,
a cheesy survivor who rem: members
putting freeze on
Citizens Bank World MasterCard accounts,
whose helplessness to fork over

substantial dollar figure
analogous to one of three blind mice,
who ran after the farmer's wife
She cut off tails (OUCH!)
with a carving knife
must pay the price
methinks food in the slammer (ha)
will lack sugar and spice,
nevertheless macht schnell trice.

I exhaled deep sigh of relief
after speaking over the telephone,
whereby Arcadia Recovery Bureau
(i.e. collection agency)
based in Reading, Pennsylvania
explained yours truly owed $23.21
which considerably alleviated
immediate dire straits that figuratively
grabbed me by the nuts
hash tagged self scoundrel
a day late dollar short
dollars to donuts bonafide klutz

living ****** mint procreative
seminal squirt biological reproduction,
could never conceive to abort
despite countless occasions,
I blithely admit characteristics
linkedin with being a putz
going off rails as a one man train wreck
mine impossible mission to avoid
NOT running amok imagine
bull in a china shop
whereby the hypothetical proprietor
willing, ready able to tear out my guts.

Pigeon toed, I trip over me own little feet
size nine shoe small size for grown man
leaving utter disaster in his wake
synonymous when havoc strikes
chaos theory alive and well
ensues when I walk about
and dare take even one baby step.

Ever since adept with ability to crawl,
I ofttimes tumbled down the stairs,
but never did shed tears nor bawl
e'en when taking nosedive head first did fall
out the hatch of airplane

splattered, plastered, and matted
think suddenly feeling comfortably numb
joist another brick in wall
nevertheless acquiring stunt man role
paid big bucks

as **** sapien disguised as Sasquatch
(cause unkempt harried styled hair)
more times than I can remember
fell to Earth minus parachute,
which hoop fully explains

the incomprehensible drawl
earnestly and frankly harkening language
once extant within Gaul
which reverberated inside hall
of mountain (lionized) king.

Prior to any madcap misadventure
yours truly envisions his clumsiness
plays out within my third eye blind
hilarious scenario unfolds in slow motion
whereby accidental flick of wrist,
barely brushes up against
flimsy clothes rack

(the original motive begetting poem)
knee **** involuntary reaction,
kicking obstacle clear across Compton
generating comical feedback loop
impossible mission to stop
blockchain of fateful bitcoin events.

Living amidst (amongst) disarray
courtesy the missus, whose domestic habits
never merit housekeeping seal of approval
twenty four/seven pose
a hazard to mine existence.
(even when iron not hot, but rather cold as ice)

Yours truly a day late dollar short
dollars to donuts bonafide klutz
living ****** mint procreative
seminal squirt biological reproduction,
could never conceive to abort
despite countless occasions,

I blithely admit characteristics
linkedin with being a putz
going off rails as a one man train wreck
mine impossible mission to avoid
NOT running amok imagine
bull in a china shop.

Pigeon toed, I trip over me own little feet
size nine shoe small size for grown man
leaving utter disaster in his wake
synonymous when havoc strikes
chaos theory alive and well
ensues when I walk about
and dare take even one baby step.

Ever since adept with ability to crawl,
I ofttimes tumbled down the stairs,
but never did shed tears nor bawl
e'en when taking nosedive head first did fall
out the hatch of airplane

splattered, plastered, and matted
think suddenly feeling comfortably numb
joist another brick in wall
nevertheless acquiring stunt man role
paid big bucks

as **** sapien disguised as Sasquatch
(cause unkempt harried styled hair)
more times than I can remember
fell to Earth minus parachute,
which hoop fully explains

the incomprehensible drawl
earnestly and frankly harkening language
once extant within Gaul
which reverberated inside hall
of mountain (lionized) king.

Prior to any madcap misadventure
yours truly envisions his clumsiness
plays out within my third eye blind
hilarious scenario unfolds in slow motion
whereby accidental flick of wrist,
barely brushes up against
flimsy clothes rack

(the original motive begetting poem)
knee **** involuntary reaction,
kicking obstacle clear across Compton
generating comical feedback loop
impossible mission to stop
blockchain of fateful bitcoin events.

Living amidst (amongst) disarray
courtesy the missus, whose domestic habits
never merit housekeeping seal of approval
twenty four/seven pose
a hazard to mine existence.
a tsunami catapulted cruising skiff
skyward landing with quiet thud
across undulating infinite granular waves
formerly solid state rocks and minerals

optimism vibrant upon initial unforeseen
crash asper for test dummies
foundered as undertow fostered diminishing hope
initial faith for survival quickly ebbed

nsync with retreating tidal wave
pessimism dreamt fantastical holograms
farther from beached berth
immediately transformed into quicksand,

while off in the distance
a glimmering chimera
(the first of many) appeared
amidst the desert sands one mirage

after another falsely broken promise
buoyed drained salvation
quick decision decreed each man for himself
thus disseminating banded bruited "brothers"

condemnation, damnation, excoriation, fulmination
hurled at cosmic creator thwarting intercession
dehydration, exhaustion, ingratiation, jubilation
foretold merciless portentous demise

witheringly desiccating lovely bones of mine
no doubt raw elements of nature wrought
fate worse than death sans, cabin "mates"
lost among expanse of whittled quartz

across chronometer measuring millions of years
now subjecting one measly mortal i.e. me
to cruel unforgiving, unrelenting,
unwelcoming petty coated junction

blistering hot wind obliterated
fellow travelers convoy deeply
within diabolical dunes
eternally erased doom

awaited for 21st century explorers
to discover scattered wreckage
both beast of burden, outrigged contrivance
and starry trekkers, who vanished without a trace

a handful of scrappy rapscallion existences
blotted (like ink, oil, or other liquid sponged),
where subsequent seasons
of wicked bewitched slow torture

akin to being raked over hot coals
exception made for this interminable sufferer
at the whim of sadistic
persona non grata evil spirit

n'er obliterating diehard survivor instinct
a foreigner to yours truly
but atavistic primitive fight or flight
witnessed relieved whence absently blinking

this life married to indiscriminate
clamped, harried, styled devilishness
evaporated in thin air
upon tentatively opening myopic brown eyes
horror, twas boot a dream.
i yam as peaceful as rolling rock
harmless toward even those who mocks
my appearance n follicular 50 plus shades of gray locks.

oye feel as important like first, second, third, fourth...banana
thus...please i yam gonna
try to forge a lifelong jimmy john james ah dah bond

   cuz an intuitive sense, u r like manna
thus ambition spurs me to wanna
do whatever in my pow wah.

aural, banal, carnal, feral, gonadal, hormonal...urges difficult to allay
to keep ***** drive at bay
on each and every single day
seriously thought to auction myself on eBay
this mwm living a life described as fey
though sunny skies, my libido reigns gray
would be thrilled to take a roll and romp within thee hay
and wonder if i could call you by the pet uni-****** name jai
in thee vernacular what most healthy guys endeavor to as a lay
which reply from yea hopefully the opposite of any sin a nim of nay
would that be okay
by the quay
today
or some night this feral primate could *** your way?

a pent up urge to ****** one or both wonderful womanly ****
introducing ye to mine little **** a doodle christened pete
found a quixotic whim to meet thru classified
   which offers a common way to meet
imagining the outcome of such of said delectable feat
but fearing the odds t'would be stacked way to high to generate beat.

yet if more than praise for citing me poetic talent doth well
more libidinal longings this humble not so long fellow could tell
and just maybe coax ye to bear thine chest for e'en just a spell
forsooth these to behold an apt comparison to a flesh born
   physiognomy portrayal of mountains tipped with *******
   and that balm in the cleavage of a wondrous dell.

this germane guy would be thrilled  
to give peaceful friendship or more
a chance desiring proper strokes o affection  
helping peppy perform his special dance
revealing moi fleshy stubby lance
thence allowing this slender guy
to remove his pantswhich scenario creates
a favorable pumping stanceaffecting you with a positive trance.

so...if drawn toward a boyish male  
of two score plus seventeen years of agewhose wardrobe oddly enough  
typically favor the color beige
with zebra like patriotic red, white and deep blue stripes  
evoking analogy of being housed like a foo fighting rat
in a cagethan respond to this introspective sagewhose will offer himself  
with negotiable legal - no fallacy - butta precious seminal wage.
so lettuce go fur zee gusto while i yam still able to trot
now, your noggin probably thoroughly mixed up
   and in your mind and even out loud, ja utter more'n !@#$ what!
  
pseudo nom de plume - scott matthews
tracfone ye kin only text
or email your carnal ville fantasy tuff flex.

this chap haint lawless nor "baad"
do not in the least presume this cyber surfer 2b a cad
in many ways, this nada so content married mister mom
   feels akin to being a single dad
who as a nonestablishmentarian shies away from any latest fad
would jump sky high leaping tall buildings
   in one bound and thus be extremely glad
to end laughably, hardly, and desultory marriage
   (with moi deux teenage lasses in tow)
   to find me own pad
and mebbe me girls would be sad
p'raps joost a tad.

a genuine passion arises within my sensitive real brave heart
which ***** purchased - on clearance - at wall mart
t'would very much like e'en an online friendship to start
thus ask ye to bee comb moi special sweet ****.

please lettuce explore ****** fun with this awesome cool dude
you cannot go wrong dear lass per beak
   combing a special "friend" toward this poet
   who tries his mother ******* best rarely to sprechen crude
and man can offer his attitude.

so...unsure if a small *** of cash persuade or tempt you
   to takes this ole (yet boyish looking) disgruntled marred buck  
visa vis discover if we both cluck
this little pecker of a beak
   would love to nibble imitating a duck
cuz in a nutshell dis mwm does really
   does wanna (pardon moi french) ****
please be the one to break this dry spell, and bring me luck
to affect ****** chords of ecstasy to pluck
argh  this dang marriage o moin does absolutely ****
driving into ye air lil parking lot my smallish truck.

anyway, i wanna so mooch touch
   n taste dem re: ***** lick kin naughty bits
especially the ones referred to as *****
where male genitalia near perfectly fits
rubbery and a bit tangy yet still tasty as buttered grits
from dis *** **** u late ted electrons
   dat go haywire with random hits
wetter day be big or little like pits
this guy alias raised on buckwheat and grits
wants to hit dat ****** n dislikes doze who quits
mail me a note - ideally a naked photo with ***, ***** and ****
and hoops to offer his gunny sack full of wisdom and wits.

this chap doth betcha ye got ample allure
n yar companionship would nada be ya bore
though getting 2 know someone = an arduously pleasant chore
especially if invited in2 their door
without getting stuck like eeyore
for...
so...If receptive 4 whatever fir fun galore
respond to the Magic Man of words nada bon joe v jure
TRACFONE NUMBER = 215--370--8929 to lure
my ear a table desires more
or
act our fantasies tum make a home run, touchdown or score.
Circa Holy Roman Empire
between ninth
and thirteenth century
after common era

(approximately 800 AD and 1200 AD)
benchmark year 780 bracketed
Benedictine monks
of Corbie Abbey
devised cheeky guttural lingual rapartee

vis a vis European
calligraphic standard script inked lined
writ via extant Irish and English monastic
members nsync
strong influence of Irish literati

eased communication
popular Latin cognoscenti
common lingua franca
spawned  Carolingian Renaissance

Codices, pagan and Christian text
plus educational material
written viz Carolingian minuscule  
Emperor Charlemagne issued prescription

(hence named Carolingian)
boosted unified modus operandi
he advocated learning,
though somewhat illiterate

recognized value of education
predicated on singular
codified regional alphabet,
the then webbed wide world

linkedin, sans uniform symbolic shapes
uncontested salient advantage
offered up ease to master
clear distinct explicit letter formation

simple logic boosted
rapidly transmitted standardization,
especially with exceptional legible
readable characteristic

adequate spaces between words
Merovingian "chancery hand"
still reserved to draft traditional charters
Gothic and Anglo Saxon

favored traditional local script
as opposed to Latin
learning latter involved less tricked out
embellished flourishes

or interconnected strokes
drawn by a scribe
allowing, enabling, and providing
greater popularity to teach masses,

latent etymological nuances apparent
centuries following implementation  
quasi initial Carolingian letters
steadfast, where Carolingian

influence moats strong
adopted local stylistic signature flavor
divergence woke since proliferation
stoking diffuse prospects

decreeing entrenched footing,
where auspices boded prescient
until groundswell didst surcease
sub limb mated into modern patois.
Joyous rapture awoke sleeping animalistic giant:
carnal, feral, gonadal horniness in deed, when defiant

this primate crossed figurative
   paths with a stunning woman
older than a spring chicken freed
   via ma hen nah paws van
jealous (of casual suitors),
when I figuratively crossed urban
paths with delectable dame.

   This hedonistic mwm veritable tan
tin nab buell lay shun caged in rein
   mister experienced euphoric San
ta Claus gifted encounter merely
   approached a female stranger ran
king as absolutely beautiful asper
   Samson recounted Delilah, Qan

i.e. qualification assurance notification
   within this poetic blurb. Pan
dum money yum (does not come close)
   upon entering a nan
oh meter times a gazillion equals
   scope of super sized ALDI's, every man
woman, and child could be housed.

   This supermarket (anchored lan
did at one end of a string of bungle
   low slung businesses conveniently kan
struck ted adjacent to popular stores,
   which aligned buildings a haven come Jan
ewe weary, these newly constructed
   bricks and mortal portals along Ian

eyesed, seen as primary corridor
   i.e. Ridge Pike (linkedin with Han
sill and Gretel recently rural gingerbread
   cookie cutter communities). Gan
a mead by Jove, said affordably priced
   food store noticed as a fan
tass tick location along the driver side
   heading towards Limerick, ean
at dark hours within Pennsylvania).

   This patron (me) of aforementioned Dan
dee nofrills modestly priced franchise
   espied an available card soon after Can
Nudda entered this outsize place
   to buy groceries. Another shopper (a bon ban
Joe plucky strung string apetite
   slip sans attractive gracefully aged gal) anan

entered said market seconds later,
   and dye motioned (to her) as she sigh
lent lee reached same idle sturdy cart,
   which ordinarily requires a quarter to pry
loose from a train of chained property.
   I unthinkingly, reflexively, and blithely my
deferred politesse she took possession of cart.

   Within instantaneous affirmation je
nais sais quais consent given for her
   to load groceries in sought after cart, this guy
noir got fast impression immediately formed,
   whereby visually this chic chica to die
for spurred enticement as very pleasing
   Halloween eye candy, hence desirable allie

madamoiselle in question totally tubularly
   unaware of lovelorn spate. Minutes before
tardy reaction (and perfect comeback
   ex post facto) momentarily preoccupied chore
viz reviewing mental check list, my intent
   to act with courage and acknowledge a door
quick to close.  Her (unbeknownst)
   attractiveness to me. Upon inadvertently
   froze me like Eeyore

glancing at thee beautiful doll female human,
   an aggregate of positivity arose. That four
tut hood toward slender youthful looking chica
   figuratively took my breath away. She galore
re: us lee ranked topnotch on my register
   of aesthetic delight. Thus, while this jackfrosted ****
frosted flake ambled up and down aisles,
   an aim sought to relay pleasant physiology while Igor
Stravinsky – Flight of the Bumblebee buzz

   within every square inch of my anatomy bon jour
quivered with cockiness, covetousness,
   and craveness without resorting to Dumble Da lore
for guidance, hence indecorous, impetuous,
   or idolatrousness loosed rampant as more
consideration asper jimmying bold, daring do
   hounded (Lo and Behold) luck did not ig nor.
A nod in answer to prayer ready set terrific
   wonderful chance arose pondering how to mine ore

and coax a major outcome addressing this ambition,
   which unceasingly pecked, piqued, dirt poor
**** lee  pricked thy noggin about sudden revelation
   presence pretty lady Upon quor
tar number of minutes passed,
   whereat her increasing proximity, an unflagging score
begging akin to patriotic duty and appeasement
   sans uttering a compliment recognized roar
ring optimal (once in a solar eclipse) chance
   to corral, field, and invoke latent obligation that tore
per regaling unknown xwoman a dollop gratutity.
   Whether embarassment ensued possibly war
temporarily shunted aside, cuz if no propensity
   to risk testing cab age comfort zones of yore

if awesome stroke ignored, a disappointment
   toward self would manifest irking conscience.
For the rest of eternity. So without missing
a beat (and reckoning with nary a spare off fence
guess not to turnip ma nose), a apple lick able amicus
   brief pickle this complimentary gents
dare devilishly egged, finessed, gambit regarding
   how gorgeous (a veritable stranger) kents
humed and appealed to me, whence squashing
   regret at a costly emotional ex pence.
after pros and cons discussed
     with six grade speech pathologist, she weighed
in favor, to launch stealth offensive
     spring time surprise raid,

which faux analogous military show of force,
     no picnic nor hit parade
though undeniably,
     unequivocally, and unquestionably

     earned the unflagging necessary
     parental consent okayed,
whose unconditional love for welfare
     of this sundered son obvious

     nasal twang genetic mutation made
constituting said congenital defect
     identified as sub
     mucous cleft palate, which laid
waste thine boyhood psyche 

     teased, thwacked, and 
     tormented, skewered, and frayed,
which exacerbated introverted 
     strongly dominant behavioral trait, 
     thus hermetically sealed convenient 
     modus operandi spelled E+V+A+D+E

the madding crowd at all costs,
     (hence quickly felt lured 
     to an emotional brink)
thus from the fountain of death, 

     I wanted to drink
versus putting up my measly 
     (not so hazardous) dukes 
     knocking out cold, every rat fink

though this scaredy pants chose passivity 
     from classmates, a tacit ticket to yawl
to deliver sucker punches 
     (as iz the wont of mean kids), 

     and evoking evoking a 
     not so shabby (nee convincing) 
     impression of a stone wall
albeit rather small

since diminutive slight build another up pall
ling (albeit) physical characteristic suffering offal
bouts of bullying, and sought refuge 
     imagining dragons 
     to beat up punks and maul

every grimacing, leering, questing
monster lurking to brandish brass knuckles 
    upon turning down this, that, 
     or another dimly lit hall 

in part, cuz zam ma pinched 
     onrush of air thru my button nose, a drawl
dangling as perfect prime call
ling card, when only within pendulum 
     swinging in pit of tummy 
     did a horrendous brawl
ensue, yet this haint all

aye wanna write, originally to explain savior 
     in the guise of speech pathologist's aid
introduced tummy upon entering sixth grade
whose intervention laid  

precedent to exercise muscles 
     along inner neck, and played
what appeared as senseless games, 
     plus navigating, regulating, 

     and vocalizing wade
ding thru one book after another 
     while tape recorder thru brickbats un afraid.

an ambivalent flashback now occurs 
     upon forcing mine ears to hear voice
of yours truly, and tis not arrogance, 
     haughtiness, nor orneriness, but aye rejoice 
perfecting good riddance to figurative 
     thorn in muss hide by choice.
A couple nights ago
(today being August 4th, 2021)
while walking around the parking lot after dark
over yonder shrieking catcall heard - hark
at first methought, a baby experienced distress,
I immediately scratched that notion
far fetched as sound out the beak of bewailing lark
but Highland Manor apartments
generally quiet as cemetery park.

Truth be told yours truly an overgrown fraidy cat
who naturally sought to turn sharp
on his heels and beat path
for domicile entrance within seconds flat.

Hypothesization generated imagination
to conjure fate worse than death
predicated after huffing and puffing
(pertaining to above mentioned activity)
gasping for my last breath
praying to dog to escape
versus being figurative cooked goose
cowardliness quickly dismissed lame excuse
to avoid become laughingstock
with addled pate stuck within noose.

Maybe ferocious feral rabid animal on the loose
oh if only seen courtesy Doctor Seuss
what with me with hair raised straight up
and/or the wild beast
charging faster than lightning greased
impossible mission to call a truce
where creature waggled her/his tail
analogous to derailed caboose

prompting joker within me
to splutter what the deuce,
not wanting to discover vis a vis
common denominator most least
cuz mortal kombat witnessed ****** bloke
pronouncing one lapsed (Aloe there)
spidery legged wandering Jew deceased.

Forsooth
aforementioned scenario fabrication of truth
insipid since contents
(reasonably rhyming materiel)
devoid remotely labeled uncouth
fiction employed to entice reading poem
tastefully accomplished akin to wine
knowingly spiked with brandy
infused with herbs and spices
such sweetened drink constitutes
one of two varieties regarding
never drinking teetotaler vermouth;
red (sweet), which originally
hails from Italy, and white (dry)
which first appeared in France.
Aye did not heed the maxim careful
     what you wish for,
     cuz now adversity not abate
perhaps helpful for thee reader

     if this bard ****
     did apprise present woe
     by turning time machine backdate
asper how the fickle finger

     of thine existence didst create,
a more agonizing situation discerning
     scythe leant presaging grim reaper date
now welcomed with

     opened arms to extricate
fools paradise by twist,
     and shout of cruel fate
e'en locked up in a damp, dank,

     and dark dungeon more grate
full, than full blown wraith zing hate
now lemme summarize
     woe of this ingrate

where reprieve of death,
     would be to good for me to jubilate
perhaps immolation, thence
     at the stake burnt offerings

     presented to the
     "FAKE" trumpeting khanate
hence complete annihilation
     the only way to liberate

a guilty conscious weighted down
     by Sisyphean sized mill stones
now whit tis time mate
to acknowledge, and try to numerate

whereat one issue found me
     reneging and being obdurate
on reimbursing me youngest daughter,
     who could not pontificate

why she needed to fork
     over monies in relation
     to overpayment re
     guarding social security,
     essentially incumbent on me

     on me eek quate
ting to a sizable tidy sum,
     finding yours truly i rate
yet refund check she sent

     over a year ago, and spate
of anger (born by eldest lass)
     unforgivable egregious stonewalling
     do to procrastination trait

this papa (rightfully my responsibility)
     objects to bearing
     brunt of arithmetical error
plus my own meager

     very limited fiduciary reserves
     induces anxiety to undulate
thus becoming fancy free
     and foot loose bachelor

appears as emotionally
     cannibalistic (ready
     to jump off a bridge)
     to shuck off this unbearable weight.
Peachy keen verboten maiden *******
USA plum ova ripe fruit
inevitably, inimitably, invariably,...
whets whistle pubescent magic flute
impossible mission to rein with absolute
zero ***** esse to temper acute

raging testosterone, I attribute
overbearing animal urge doth constitute
difficult surge protector
resultantly, subsequently, untimely...
not inconceivable teenage
parenthood does contribute

overwhelming responsibility
adds complex twist making destitute
expense regarding sudden newlife
analogous how simple surface
Möbius strip doth render convolute
frivolous shenanigans offer pointless dispute

buck haws fawn hook caisson
akin to holding back the tide, disrepute
fallout, whereby accountability ideally
one must distribute
between minors, who risked major shock
generally ill prepared to handle

grasping hot wire strong
enough to electrocute
call of the wild heedless,
when in throes to execute
human reproduction hard rock
tune somber sober air thenceforth

issues out magic flute
after drenching, dribbling, drooling
residual expulsions 'pon hirsute
tuft possibly engendering hyperacute
revulsion basically atavistic
copulation recalls imbrute

tell tale swollen belly of gal doth impute
culling instinctual maternal institute
fancy free footloose
promiscuity makes involute
sober reality moot point,
whether one or both kids feel irresolute
adding insult to injury

mama's papa's none to happy
swiftly kickstarts  harried styled jackboot
careful pops not to damage unborn
vital umbilical cord taut as jute
strong enough to harness malamute
and/or team of huskies in conjunction with

wild horses or domesticated
breeds Equus caballus
couldn't drag away even for one minute
infinitesimal speck - trim
unmistakable to misattribute,

how basic multiplication
one cannot miscompute,
and product will upend and misroute
grandiose plans leaving
puppy love mute.
Been making, (sans
     daily) regular appearance
in the news oval
     hate gambling arrogance
vis a vis spewing,
     shouting, and scathing rabidly
     foaming explosive clap
     trap in ascendance,

asserting how incredibly
     tremendous collusion between
     CIA, FBI and media
(must warrants revocation,
hence heroic intervention,
     and emergency dis
     Pence sing balance
     of security fabled

     clearances Aesop - Asap)
     hounds engaged "brilliance"
in (community) chance
of making an very
     usual fool of himself,
     viz the "FAKE"
     trumpeting dapper Don
     expostulating the latest ploy,

     raging against the machine
     i.e. entire popular culture
     will get their comeuppance
being so freely outspoken,
     a disgraceful unconstitutional defiance
which oh press
     sieve act of deviance
spluttered, thus an extreme

     measure to clamp down
     on all news outlets,
     and immediate disappearance
all the while poor
     Melania stoically, objectionably
     and lamentably stands
     right alongside him,
     (nonetheless nonverbally

2.
     metaphorically exhibiting
     vitriolic livid rage)
     as he rancorously spouts
     (ala VERY) convincing impression
     of la va reenactment qua,
Krakatoa volcanic disturbance
lambasting utter disgraceful disservice
(foxy Dis Putin

     commercial stations construe, conspire,
     conjure egregious collusion
     outlets asper dominance
a pugilistic ringside fan loathsomely
     (re: scowling non verbally),
     wherein pejorative spectators whether
     (moral less minority, and/or
     majority whips lashing) weather being

     subsequently splashed by
     LXXII spittle aged
     perspiring ogre) with exuberance
(like some voodoo freelance
sing hexed indigo gurl goo goo doll,
a villainous venal mummified
     rattle trap declaring forbiddance
from this moment forward grievance

fomented by via triple threat
     to American democracy
     sans, intransigence, insouciance, ignorance,
thus taking recourse upon the heads
     of "stupid" journalists forcing hand
toward "losers" who spread lies,
     hence president signs issuance
analogous to lance

sing (via strong trumpeting arm),
     a yuge bigly boil saying believe me
     (meaning him - ***** in chief)
asseverating the congressional,
     global, and orbital
     bulwark acting with noncompliance
necessitating entire military
     industrial complex arsenal

     heavily reinforced (at
     the expense of every social,
     governmental, environmental, etc cetera
     to manage unruly populace
     with mandatory diktat decreeing obeisance
with non dodging demagoguery
     huff ford ding auto-da-fé fiat ordinance
this platform to guarantee overdominance,

when November 2020 election
     for forty sixth president
     takes place with poignance!
(Land that doth marry mother lode
of sublime earthen land and sea).

Age of exploration
   ushered cruel fate
   against “red” men living
   in bliss by agents

   patch of eden north
   o Mason Dixon line
   latitude: 39.64839
   longitude: -75.95591 alee

perchance designed
   by divine providence
   with dyslexic humorous bents
   Cecil county Maryland

   lies like plump backward letter “e”
witnessed topographic erosion
   pocked imprimatur marked
   meteorological dents

   thru inundation of
   oceanographic propensities
   melding coastline like Galilee
in particular by Chesapeake Bay,

   that body of water
   abutting like natural fence
   first witnessed by captain
   John Smith in 1608

   mistaking himself tong tied
   in sole of Italy
learned faux pas, when crossing paths
   with Susquehannas hence,

   offered tobacco sticks to natives
   while recovering
   from injured wounded knee
said other sundry tribes curiously eyed
then (I utilized poetic license)
took smoke from packet of Kents
   which twist on actual
   historical facts manipulated by me
but more truthful account awash
   and replete with more

   than interspersed nonsense
   and incorporates tract situated
   in so called Fertile Crescent – see
settled by Europeans of English stock,

   who emigrated with nary a pence
   “taming” shrew like “noble savages”
    plied Leviathan sized ukuleles
whose might exploited for felling forests,
   which timber built cabins with vents.
aye savor the faire genetic blueprint
   extant unique to each of us
   with this quite alimentary aire
   including (that almighty,
   bottom, cushiony, dimpled,

   excretory functioning Gluteus Maximus
   i.e. the ***** when bare  
with subtle difference sans,
   both halves at first blush,
   but tucks upon closer scrutiny

   obvious inexactness crystal clear
as a bell jar, asper each body electric,
   whence deserved of en dear
ments despite however much junk in the trunk

   behind the private
   no trespassing (non verbalized)
   signs posted everywhere
off limits only to a select few like this bard
   attired as if from the Renaissance Faire
whose unconditional acceptance
   unlike the majority hoo gawk and glare

if bipedal hominid dealt
   chromosomal traits say with excessive hair
which mane of tangled strands,
   could be problematic and interfere
with coaxing, finagling,
   or inducing friendship with an initial jeer

from him or her averse
   toward such imperfection to boot
huff lawed physical human specimen
   such as this ole coot
(who haint really that old),  

   can upon command execute
a feigned display
   and appealing as fresh field picked fruit
at this stage of ma life
   donut give a rats ***, nor an owlish hoot

what other may decry about me,
cuz self acceptance doth agree
buzzing with greater confidence, esteem,
   and general weaknesses such
   as lack of physiognomy incongruent cee,

which asymmetry of this primate feel free
er than his pre/post pubescent
   corporeal essence he
near put himself in the hand
   of that grim reaper, a key
poor of lifeless beings,

   and well nigh got hold da mee
when in the throes up
   (vis a vis not bulimia) on Swiss side prithee
and as a solitary mwm gives no re
guard no matter others may find fault
   in the stars at my lack of sim mutt tree
gnome hatter judgements made
   I accept mice elf warts and all – yippee!
Google Embedded Microchip™¡åßç

Nowadays...ah so passe routine top notch roboticized
brain surgery ushers, inoculates, begets... promising
immunity against pesky flagging and/or absent minded
precursor to dementia praecox, alzheimer's regarding
partial/total recall asper memory, said loss linkedin with
age related degeneration, or perchance suffering axed

dentally (aka Sid Vicious syndrome) deadly lethally, wily
adroit, adept pugilistic hook courtesy Hawaiian aloha sly
and ****** Mister, (nonetheless Judy Is hush) punch
to the noggin, and/or misfortune befalls a chap courtesy
severe deliberate accidental blow to the head, (perhaps
employment related mishap versus domestic altercation

non risky tampering with gray matter, no longer relegated
to decreasing faulty excellently trained human hand/eye
coordination (operations performed by prestigious so old
school doddering doctors, when humanoids or androids
dream of shaving electric sheep in mock simulation tend
ding to shorn hirsute patient) can supplant out moded

neurosurgeons (a fraction of expense, plus highly always
alert maximally functional at one hundred percent), the
former predictably bankable low cost allowing, enabling
and providing (rocking round the clock) supremely deft,
flawless, sedulous trappings of science, (a small number
of generations ago, oh... just an aside Leonard Peltier,

a Native American activist and an enrolled member of the
Turtle Mountain Chippewa, who also genetically breaded
with sprinkling of Lakota and Dakota descent. He counts
as a vital member of the American Indian Movement aka
(AIM), and put forward a cogent notion to buzzfeed long
since forcibly dispersed, lambasted, scattered... native

peoples to embed during in utero development bot size,
nee microcosmic electronic circuit housing comprehensive
indigenous languages new inherently speak, yes I vouch
safe marginally compensatory for their Holocaust. A plus
side applying technology in general, and when indefatigable
robots in particular supremely jump start (batteries not

required) indigenous cultural identities rent asunder like...
greased lightning, this forward progressive application to
boost natural diminishing memory recall, whereby figurative
seat of thinking now popularly trending (giving expected
rapidly burgeoning, growing, proliferating... gerontological
bracket to captcha (rather to seize or) salad days boosting
opportunities for elderly folk revisit smarts of their youth.
Intrigued about cremation,
I sought GOOGLE to assuage curiosity
significant questions answered
clicking the following website
https://www.funeralwise.com/plan/
cremation/cremation-process/

though summarizing article
some oven death defying act,
yet summarization satisfactorily completed,
thus herewith briefly describes
kickstarting, mystifying, pulverizing...
tantalizing, yielding, enterprising, lasting,

yelping, holding, surviving dearly departed
1. deceased identified
2. official cremation authorized
affiliated with deceased
3. lifeless body prepared
4. medical devices removed

5. jewelry recovered
6. corpse secured
into burnable cremation receptacle
7. encased entity transferred
to retort i.e. cremation chamber
8. temperature range adjusted

between 1400 degrees -
1800 degrees Fahrenheit
9. 1.5 - 2 hours elapsed
10. magnet applied
residual metal removed

11. remains ground into ashes
12. once process completed
remains secured within urn
13. family representative entrusted
with ashes.

Burnt offerings distributed
ideally according to stated
wishes of beloved,
whose remembrance sustained
as tears expended
necessary to mourn
eventually sorrow lessened,
photographs visited
after crushing grief decreased.
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