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You've ruined it all
Into my arms
I was holding you
Into my arms
When you told me
Into my arms
I was a mistake
Into my arms
you cried
Into my arms
You asked who played that song
Into my arms
The skies in your eyes fell
Into my arms.
The plump moon lights up my room.

My mind is now a flat graph
no desire no lust no dream

the cold winds from the rumbling sea
make no dent on me
I look at my palms
and see the cracked floor
gnarled roots of mangrove on the wall
blend seamlessly with all I have
like once I had her in this room
love together
taking wingless flight to the moon
but now I more like sitting here
prospecting no words to rhyme
not angered at the blankness
for in this vacuous moonlight
I wait without a hope of gain
without a despair of loss
unconstrained for time
contoured by fireflies
alone
recounting a new beginning
from the end.
 Apr 2017 Aeerdna
Niqolet Lewis
In a box in a garage
with all the dusty forgotten somethings
that we don't want
but cant throw
there was that photo
and it takes me straight back
****** through a vortex
its been 12 years
and I am broken all over again
every step that I made
every breath that I took
erased

following a creature through the forest
I've been chasing that rabbit for 12 years
following, trusting
she climbs higher and higher
dont look back
we are so far from there
dont look down
and we are never going back
if I can keep up
I know she can lead me somewhere
get me out of here
with leaps and bounces
she jumps off rocks and over rivers
she doesn't stop
she never stops

so I follow
sometimes i forget to follow
I look back at the path
and if you're not careful where you take stock
its not safe to stay here
you're coming up around the bend
and this ledge is narrow
12 years of climbing
and I slipped right back to the bottom
that rabbit she waits
she never looses me
I loose her
but I haven't
she sits and she waits
its hard for her to wait
she hates to wait

She found me in the darkness
In that black hole by the side of the highway
with palm trees overhead
4 o'clock in the afternoon
100ks an hour
I walked that overpass
and I thought about jumping over
or stepping out
I fell down that hole
cavernous and pitch black
all but for that white rabbit
looking at me
waiting for me
we climbed out of there
she lead me out of there
and I've been following that rabbit ever since
still as white as ever

Does it ever get better
I dont know
keep running.
 Apr 2017 Aeerdna
Manda Raye
It's nearly our bedtime and you're asleep now,
you have been for hours--actually--just as I knew
you would be when you first lay down tangled
in a net of blankets, promising, "I won't, I won't"
with drowsy confidence after asked if you were going
to sleep. "I just want to lie down," your gentle hand
shooed me away. And so I went, leaving a light trail
of kisses so I could find my way back.
 Apr 2017 Aeerdna
SøułSurvivør
I was once a castaway
Of an unforgiving sea
I made a castle in the sand
To ease the pain in me

I made the ramparts ten feet tall
The walls were four feet thick
I filled the moat with lots of sharks
I built it brick by brick

I walked the walls most every day
No rescuer about
But I did not want folks to come in
I wished to keep them out!

The sand was cast in hate you see
The mortar my foe's blood
I repaired the walls quite often 'coz
My inner tears would flood

Within the walls, a prisoner,
My anger was my meat
My only water my own tears
They washed about my feet

Finally the water rose,
From weeping, o'r my head
Their waves erroded at the walls
And the SEA was fed!

Whilst the walls were quickly shrinking
A tide, like floods, came in!
All the sharks went out to sea,
My destiny was grim!

I made a fine, tall castle, yes,
Of sand & shells & grout
To shelter me within? Oh no!
To keep my loved ones OUT!

And others unforgiven.
And the ones I hated.
And other prejudices, yes,
That went on unabated...

And so I found a Mighty Rock
Upon which I stood.
I finally found life's meaning, YES!
I finally understood!


Forgiveness? A DECISION.
To put pride on the shelf.
And freeing up your fellow man
You  become FREE YOURSELF.

Though for years, I drank my tears,
My thirst was never slaked.
And hatred's fused & melted sand

Does not a DIAMOND MAKE.



SoulSurvivor
(C) 4/3/2017
I've been writing a book about my Scientology experience. And in doing so I found I had a root of bitterness in me. Not only towards Scientologists, but toward a lot of people who have hurt me in my life. It cost me a great deal of mental anguish. I ended up making a decision to forgive again. Throughout my Christian walk I've had to do this. Forgiving others is not an option. In order to be forgiven by God, you must forgive other people. Think of all the ***** rotten stinking things you've done to others I thought to myself. They may not have forgiven you. But you still need to forgive them. And forgive yourself while you're at it! So I asked God again to give me the willingness to forgive. I made the decision to forgive. And I do forgive. Forgiving does not mean forgetting. You don't let people hurt you over and over again. All it means is that you are relinquishing them of the debt that they owe you. And you, in turn, are forgiven of the debts you owe as well.

Unforgiveness is like self-administered poison. It can cause all kinds of diseases. Cancer is caused by stress. Arthritis can be directly attributed to unforgiveness. One of my major problems physically is osteoarthritis. And there is a strong possibility that I may have cancer. I do not wish to have either of these things obviously. So the first medicine I'm going to take is spiritual....

That's why I call myself SOULSURVIVOR.

I'm writing and reading on the internet again, obviously. See you soon!
 Apr 2017 Aeerdna
Emily Dickinson
1111

Some Wretched creature, savior take
Who would exult to die
And leave for thy sweet mercy’s sake
Another Hour to me
 Apr 2017 Aeerdna
Gidgette
Tulips catch sky water for the fairies today
Late blooming March Bells,
the only sun
Dandelions dance, taking even the breath of The Almighty
In their glistening glory
Weeping Cherry tree sways, as though she's a ballerina,
Covered in perfectly cut crystals
Oil on the street,
becomes a rainbow with fragments of light,
stolen from heaven
As I watch,
Heaven falls
Making love with every earthen thing
giving shine
Love
Nourishing
Spring Rains
My love to each and everyone of you. Really<3
 Apr 2017 Aeerdna
Nik Bland
Trembling vision and quivering knees indicate your world is shaking
A sinkhole beneath the concrete once thought of as a foundation
A tapestry of normality ripped violently to pieces
As you find yourself falling once again

A bleeding heart within my sight, a glass wall in between
As you pour your insides onto the floor and I look on helplessly
And I would offer a healing word, but the world drowns them silent
As I find you there, falling once again...
 Apr 2017 Aeerdna
Graff1980
Untitled
 Apr 2017 Aeerdna
Graff1980
You meet in committees
with shareholders from
war contractors
watching them proclaim,
“We need more money
and less oversight.
We need to expand our
external influence.”

Their words spread
like the bubonic plague.
Such a phage,
yet they still say,
“We have to delay
China
and Russia
from doing the same.”

So we put up
the TTP,
while the drones
we made
invade
other countries.

You say, “we are
the only people
who can save
the whole world
and it will take
business interest
to truly preserve
our military power.”

You say……

I have to turn you off.
I have to turn away,
because my tears fall.
They are tears of rage.
You never hear me
no matter what I say.
So, ******* America
you are not great,
stop putting your greed,
inhumanity, and stupidity
in display in a parade
of such extremely
violent charades.
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