It's not that I'm comparing you to him  

but when someone shows you their
world of magic & wonder  

it's hard to settle in a slum, with eyes of hope.

The tears that decorated my face that night have left to become stars.

They remind me of the love I have for you shining ever so brightly.

& not a single night passes that I don't find you up in the cosmos amongst my tears.

Other times I kiss the northern winds, let them dance with my curls while caressing my curves. Drifting me away, a feather in a gentle tornado towards vague, dreamlike, foreign lands.  

& in other occasions I belong wholeheartedly to the moon. She's my favorite intimate lover, the most passionate of all. Her dark mysteries keep me addicted to the light she steals from the sun.

Then when the sun takes me, lights me up, burns me, sweet sweet fire, as he embraces me. A Phoenix coming back to him over & over. Naked scars & whispers of warm love, poems that tell me he shines for me, keeps the soil under my feet warm for me, tells me he lives for me.

All the while the ocean waits patiently for me to yet again submerge myself in the chaos of its storms. Maybe all the salt water in the oceans are just tears that've been shed waiting for lovers to embrace its madness. Oceans long for fearless lovers, lovers that fear not the wrath of its solitude and forbidden passion.

& once in a blue moon I sit in silence & succumb to the unknown. Most of the time words fail me and I can't describe the way I unwrap myself in the darkness. Dark matter, the ether, my intangible lovers living in the same place. There's an art to losing yourself in places like these.

Sometimes I belong to you, but for the most part, I belong to myself.

Disregarding the pain of the unfamiliar.
Without looking outside of ourselves.
Unassociated from those unlike us.
Like if we didnt know that under
their exact circumstances
we would've done the
very same thing.

Thus,
we are all in the same.
Empathy.

I needed you to give me something I could feed of off...

Even one word would've satisfied my hunger for you...

The romantic notion of you is disappearing with his taste...

What inspires you?
What makes your heart overflow with love & joy?
What makes you feel whole & at your peak when doing it?
What makes you feel invincible?
What is it that fuels your dreams?

        & why don't you do it more often?
                                   Love always Sarahi

Have you the slightest idea of what
It's like to have a person you love
dissolve into madness?

He dove in head first to a bottomless
pit of insanity.
& no matter how much we try.
We can't even send him a memory of
what the sun used to looks like.

Let's say you have a different outlook on life,
& the people you love most tell you it's not real.
That you're demented,
and everything you see as real isn't.

Then arises the question:
If perception is key, when does it become a reality?
What is real?

& if physics is correct,
this is all just a probability.
If so, then why does it hurt so much?

nothing stands a chance
everything around her falls in love
maybe it's the way her eyes
have a deep, even cruel sadness
that captivates your soul
with a smile that makes you
forget the reason for your existence,
and the sadness in her eyes
maybe it's her sweet voice
tantalizing, seductive, tempting
she's like all the books you've ever loved
don't let her touch you
you won't escape
but catch a glimpse and you won't look away
the mysteries of an untamable woman
she's endless, loving, magic
to the passing of her beloved
she gained me,
heartbreaking luck

Caught you off guard
With a lighthearted smile
And
in that fraction of a second
I could see the child that dwels within you

Pure and sincere  
Silly, lover of all things
The one who forgets to judge
One that lives on mountains of
Creative curiosity
Explorer of unfathomable lands
Innocence through your eyes filled with awe

As fast as it came, it left.
You grew up once more to a dull, monotonous and frivolous conditioning the we are shaped into as children.

Live my brothers & love with an intensity only permitted in your dreams and hidden fantasies.

I didn't look at you long enough...
I missed everything.
But I do remember the way you would stare at me & smile.
You know those looks that help you forget about time, space & all boundaries that have ever existed.
Those looks that last either a second or an eternity but you're not sure because you just saw all the love within him through his irises.
If I remember nothing else,
that look will be enough to last me a lifetime.
With the sole condition that you find me again in the next one.

Funny,
she tried to visit
so she could talk to God
but at the gates of heaven
they asked her for a visa.

They denied her entrance, so
she jumped the gate with a pure heart.

An immigrant in the realm of heaven.

I love unconditionally.
I'm selfish,
if I want you I'll have you.
Sometimes when it's morally incorrect,
I'm sorry if I've hurt you.
Love,
when it's forbidden.
Love when it's forgotten.
I don't question love,
love crimes.
Desire, love, lust
dont bring me one without
the other.
Give me madness,
and a passion the stars will envy.

Thursday night,
Met by utter faith
He told me about his life
He opened up quickly
He explained how he was effected by the death of his parents
How his grandpa always saw the good in everyone & never spoke foul
He told me what it's like growing up with an Italian family
How growing up in Brooklyn made him tough
He told me about the persona he had to play in his profession
He talked about energetic connections, souls and how destiny ultimately gets you & traps you
He said how imperfections make us perfect
He talked about the sincerity in my eyes, the delicacy of my voice
He asked if he could see me again
From opposites end of the country, find me, and make me yours again

A faded memory of your silhouette,
every time I close my eyes
I bite my lips & pretend it's you
my skin screams your name

Intangible presence,
your ghost haunts my days, my nights

I remember the first time I saw you
still feel the fire that was egnited  
the burning passion made me come alive
but now
nobody's been able to touch me,
that fire burns them to ashes

"Perhaps our particles
had been together many times before,
like we might've been near each
other when the Big Bang happened.  
That's why gravity might work
so well in our favor.
Keeping us
together."

Give
me
a few
drops of
passion
&
I''ll
find
the
ocean.

Help me forget all the
Times he held my universe
Together with a look into my eyes.
Help me change time,
So that the seconds don't scream his name.
Help me remove the scars he left all
Over my body, memories of caresses turned bruises, bruises that turned into hurt, pain that stayed as scars.
Help me love you, I'm begging you.