Sometimes I want to float out my bedroom window;
Past the unkept yellow bungalow,
Past the fir trees and the winter carcasses of rose bushes,
Past all the street lamps and their glow.
It's time to go.
I feel tired and torn and the soles of my shoes are worn.

When I'm high it's not that I'm less sad-- I just feel the sadness in a different way... and somehow that helps.

These last few months left a bad taste in my mouth;
The bad taste of dagger flavoured alcohol,
Of too much ****, cough syrup and coke.

This month left me empty and broke,
I want to choke out the truth to you but some things are too painful to speak--

I never imagined something so painful wouldn't bleed.

This was the fourth time I'd heard the crack of death;
In my experience, when someone dies you can hear this pop or crack sound.
This was the fourth time I heard the pop of death, life escaping from a body.
But this time it was different because that crack came from inside me;
It was the snap that severed me from the universe.

I've got a list of things I have to pay and a list of people I owe and favours I'll never be able to repay.
I can't feel love or happiness or pain I just watch everything happening and it's so tragic because amidst our progress  nothing has ever really changed.

My dad is so proud because I'm going to university,
My mom sees hope,
And my sister looks up to me.

I'll become a doctor,
and my mom will tell her friends,
I'll have kids and a husband and take antidepressants.

I want to die so bad sometimes but I'll never take that leap.
My life is a promise to them I've still got to keep.

This is the kind of happiness that comes in waves.
Water fills coves and beach shores but just as quickly as the waves were given, they're taken away.
The tide is at its peak and I prepare myself for the emptiness I'm going to feel when it leaves.