growing up they say
it's all about being independent
about living alone
about loneliness
and that's what im so afraid of
not of independence
not of living alone
but of the loneliness
of the loneliness that eventually
consumes me, takes me
that should make me proud of myself
because hey, i'm living alone
but just throws me back in
into this cycle of quiet, of thoughts
the cycle that drags me into the deep
dark corners of my mind
that won't let me escape
won't let me want to escape
because it's safe here
it's quiet
it's alone.

i know i'll be fine at first
figuring out my daily routine
my cycle, day after day
of school to home to gym
with some occasional happiness
of friends, of family
but in the end
it's just me, alone
the sulk on my face
never leaving
the tears in my eyes
always returning

and i'm afraid
that i'll be so deep
in the darkness
that i won't be able
to come out of it
that i'll be stuck there
seeing my life as nothing
more than lows with temporary highs

i need you
i don't want to be alone
i can't be
i won't be me if i am
and i'm afraid i never will

yes, i know you want me to be
independent
but i don't want to be
alone
because when i'm
lonely
i don't know what i'll do
to feel better

sure, nobody's perfect
no one ever said they were
but i want to be perfect for you

there's always something missing
some vibe, some part that just
can't fill the hole

i'm just never enough
for anyone

two people, both alike in so many ways
both broken a little, here and there
both with the thought that

no one could love them

everything changes in a day
24 hours is all anyone has
made use of to the fullest

too fast too soon too close
all happens at once
and they let it, they want it

maybe they were just lonely
maybe they were bored
maybe they had given up, but

they made a choice, one that continues
on into the uncertain future,
fraught with obstacles at every turn

but it's a choice
one that they have to make
every single day

that's what love is about isn't it?
it's about choosing them everyday
it's about not making promises but keeping them anyway
it's about a special kind of bond, unbreakable

maybe they've found it, maybe not
but for two people, broken a little
it's more than enough

i never thought
in a million years
would i sit there
under the blazing sun
still sea water
soft sound of crashing waves
in your arms,
thumb mindlessly strokes me
hand holding mine
leaning on you
my body fitting with yours so perfectly

never
*but it happened