maybe,
we both believe that it's just a word
and it can't possibly make up for all the damage
we cause time after time
to once again claim we're sorry

so, neither of us ever expected an apology
nor demanded one.

maybe,
we realise that it's unknowingly promising
to not repeat the same mistake
therefore, we choose to not disappoint each other
with the hope of sorry

so, neither of us expected an apology
nor demanded one.

maybe,
you know that your words can hurt me
but you say them anyway,
because there are times when I'm just as cruel
and we'd rather be equally destructive
than sorry

so, neither of us expected an apology
nor demanded one.

We sat there in silence, comfortable silence, as he drove, with no destination in mind.
I put my head back, and rolled down the window
as I shifted a little in the comfy passenger seat.
I felt an absolute sense of calmness in his presence,
like the entire world was at peace
like my worries were suddenly fading to grey
like my mind will forever be at ease
like I would gladly spend an eternity in that car, if I could convince him to stay.
I looked over to see his hand was on the steering wheel
and the other, reaching for a cigarette.
I could feel him getting frustrated;
he was unable to move his eyes from the road
so the search only got louder with every second
until I offered to get it
and he let out a sigh of relief…
like the entire world was at peace
like all his problems were suddenly fading to grey
like his mind will forever be at ease
like he would gladly spend an eternity in that car, if he had his cigarettes and an ashtray.

his thoughts kept him up late at night
that his mind begins to travel to
a time in his past that might
strangely, help him get through

so many questions
with answers he was working through
he just could not fathom
how easy I was able to 
get over him
him, and his crew
I would explain why I walked away from the friends
I thought were true
but he hates it all too much
to see things from my point of view
I remind him of his failures,
ones that he still tries to pursue
he sincerely believes that these walls
aren't hard enough to break through

he silently wishes and wishes again,
that I would listen to him like I was his friend
he wonders if he could mend
this wonderful friendship or at least,
could he tie up the loose end?

"the memories of winter
should haunt you
the days were long,  
and as time flew
we made more memories
than I expected to
we sat side by side at the movies almost as if
we were stuck together like glue
we were closer than ever
then suddenly, I was without you
it bothers me that it was out of the blue
when you impatiently said
you have no value"

I sit here and think and think
so much I construe,
are these really the thoughts
of the friends I outgrew?

I deeply inhaled
every tobacco filled air
you ever exhaled.

How twisted is it
that I'm attached to a stench
that's suffocating?

Nicotine doesn't seem
so addicting and harmful
when compared to you.

I ******* shoved galaxies into your hands and you have me nothing in return

I find everything absolutely breathtaking.

How can you not think your murky yet sparkling brown eyes aren't the most intriguing things? They are powerful enough to give me nervous butterflies.

Why can't you see the way the clouds capture the sun, making, if only for a second, the perfect bittersweet scene. The suns finally goodbye makes a masterpiece that is impossible to recreate.  

It is a mystery to me how you do not pay attention to the damp smell of the rainy earth, or the tingling pinpricks of snowflakes resting on your exposed skin.

Why haven't you taken time to get as close as you can to the galaxies that construct the roof above you and explore them? They are fascinating at night when each star becomes luminous against the black of night.

Darling, everything around you thrives with beauty.

I learned today that for eyes to be like oceans they don't have to be blue

There were galaxies in your eyes and skeletal constellations connecting your blazing white bones the comets from your eyes continued to fall you couldn't see what I could because of the exploded nebulas that created too dense of breathtaking  stardust so you thought you were just a terrifying black hole you made yourself bleed stars you said to not get close because you ****** up light and happiness when really it was you creating it