What do you choose?

A shorter man that moulds his heart of gold into your every desire.
Or..
A taller man incapable of unwrapping his tin foil heart for even the most simple things you require.

Chasing dreams of perfect heights to hang a perfect wedding picture on that perfect family portrait wall.

Perfect is hard to come by, careful or you'll miss it. Looking in all the wrong places.

You ask me why we never talk anymore
It's like you've erased from your memory
The fact
That we never did
Maybe you don't remember
The days that you told me
That I was worthless
Maybe you've forgotten
That December afternoon
When you manically drove full speed
Into the car ahead of us
And cried of disappointment
When you found your family
Still breathing
Or perhaps you can't recall
The Friday night
When I told you that I wanted to take my life
And you went to the kitchen
To hand me a knife
Maybe you think
That your newfound success
Makes you a better parent
Maybe you've convinced yourself
That envelopes of money
And elaborate gifts
Will heal open wounds
And fade tattooed scars
Maybe in your mind
You've rewritten the past
But I'm stuck on a page
That I simply cannot turn

The heart --
        Can never be open
        Unless somebody
        Breaks it.
        
The love --
        Can never be true
        Unless somebody
        Makes it.

The seasons --
        Can never change
        Unless somebody
        Feels it.

These blankets --
        Can never be warm
        Unless they are
        Somebody's arms.

These words --
        Can never be relevant
        Unless they are
        For you.

Our love has faded like the seasons
and yet....
It cuts deep to think of the reasons.

They are in the very corners of my brain
and like a caged animal..
I retrace steps again and again.

If spring and summer were the very best
then what....
Do fall and winter represent, the test?

But is love like a winter tree instead
.......
The branches are bare, but it isn't dead?

I'm just a memory in your head,
Long gone, but missed in your bed.
My skin is aching for your touch,
Even association for you is too much.
Wasted nights thinking of your name,
Now my head bows in shame.
Never could I ever leave you alone,
Sitting here empty, my heart has no home.
Oh what a mistake I had made,
"Love me, love me" I prayed,
And if I had known of what frayed,
Then maybe you would have stayed.  People change and time goes on,
But a picture of friendship has been drawn.
All I wanted was your attention,
Your acknowledgement of me was an honourable mention.
Now late at night when you enter my head,
No tears for you will be shed.
So tell your self when you cry to sleep,
Love is not love when the other makes you weep.

I use to be so young and free.
Till Uncle Sam got a hold of me.
He made me a lean, mean, killing machine.
So I could be shipped off to war.
To protect where the eagles soar.
I did my tours.
Thinking nothing more.
Till night when all I see is war.
I use to be so young and free.
Please help me rid this PTSD