Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
Hanna Kelley Feb 2016
Eyes are the gateway to the soul.
I used to be able to look into someone's eyes and see happiness, everyone was always so happy.
Few people would ever look sad, their eyes would show flashbacks of pain and doubt, always hurt by the past.
I used to look in the mirror and laugh because I would watch my memories dance around my eyes and bring me joy.
But then reality kicked in.
I can't stand to look at myself in the mirror.
Now when I look at myself, it's like I fade to black and white.
I am dragged into my soul and drown by my memories.
I am tortured by what has happened to me and what has happened to the people around me, I am suffocated by the reality of the world and the brutality of people.
I am scared to keep eye contact with people because I don't want them to be dragged into the darkness of my memories.
I don't want them to see the things I won't tell them.
There are only a few times when I can hold eye contact, and that's when someone understands.
I meet my friends eyes and I can see their hurt, our memories comfort each other saying "you're not alone".
Hanna Kelley Jan 2016
And now I know why it's called a
broken heart
Hanna Kelley Jan 2016
When you see a painting hanging on a wall,
You don't really question it,
You see the painting as it is and its placement on the wall, not much else.

Some people are more interested than others and so they want to buy the painting.

They see its origin, the frame, its design, how much effort was put into it, the story behind its art.

After a while, some people get bored of it,
They give it away because they don't want it anymore.

And while some people took the time to look at my art,
You spent all of your money on paintings that weren't me.
Hanna Kelley Jan 2016
She is a pearl, not fully grown yet.
She hides in her shell away from the predators that only want to rob her of herself.
Over the years she grows, she adapts to the world around her because she knows that once she is done growing she will be something beautiful.
She plays show and tell with the tales of her young depression, the solitary game of hide of seek that she wanted so badly to win but she could never find herself.
The only game she ever wins is the mind game that no one other than herself can figure out.
She is awarded champion for making it into high school, the hell years of her life.
She did it, she made it this far,
And now everyone and everything are at her throat trying to drown her in her self doubt and the misery that a waits when she comes up for air.
She holds her trophy high as if it was supposed to be a beaken of hope repeating to herself "I can do it".
She questions her heart, like her heart is the one teasing her with happiness but we all know it isn't.
She tries so hard to hide herself from everyone who could potentially cause her harm but its impossible, her shell is cracked and everyone has found the opportunity to try to break in.
Her insecurities are scars, heart breaks are bruises, betrayel shows as broken bones, dishonesty are missing teeth for each person who has ever walked out of her life.
...
She plays a game of show and tell with her young depression, like she can point to each scar and say "I was fat", each bruise and repeat "he left me for her", each broken bone, each tooth and her tears will tell you the rest.
She will walk over to her trophy case and sigh because she knows it doesn't give her hope, its just proof showing she could withstand breaking infront of everyone for years.
She is a pearl who grew up the wrong way, she will never be perfect.
She will have dents and cracks and she won't be as strong as she was supposed to be.
But that doesn't matter because only beautiful people show their flaws,
She is still everything beautiful to me.
Hanna Kelley Jan 2016
You let go. Move forward. And yes, sometimes it hurts.
Life is like monkey bars
Hanna Kelley Jan 2016
It's heartbreaking but when their are two
One must go
LMI ❤
Next page