1.  There is nothing romantic about the way our hair falls out or the way we hover over the open toilet like there's no other empty space in the house.
2. Do not think that it will be easier to love us because the love we aren’t giving ourselves will go to you.
3. You can trail your fingers along my rib cage, count every vertebrae in my back like marbles stacked high on top of each other. This is not beautiful, this is what dying looks like.
4. I’m sorry for the smell of my breath, but there’s no amount of toothpaste that could cover up the smell of myself rotting from the inside out.
5. “I thought you had to be skinny to have an eating disorder.”
5.   “You don’t look like you starve yourself.”
5.   I know that you wish you could hold me without worrying i’ll turn to dust if you squeeze too hard.
6.   I grew up being told that my body is a temple and I should treat it as such, but I don’t think this is right, see; temples can be destroyed but it always takes another person. I am doing this to myself.
7.   I can’t remember the last time I ate without feeling guilty.
7.   I can’t remember the last time I ate.
8.   One day, I will be nothing and you will be nothing, and i’m sorry that i’m already so close to being gone.
9.   I want to get better. I am trying to get better.
10. Do not think that loving us will be easier, because the love we do not give ourselves is gone, and we cannot love you more than we don’t love ourselves.

This is it.
My ending.
My epitaph.
I am exhausted.
I have explored every idea I wanted to explore.
I have told the stories I have wanted to tell.
My imagination has been stretched to its very limits.
It's time to call it a day.

For now.

Perhaps, someday, I may return.
To write a second chapter.
A new beginning.
Perhaps.

Until then, farewell.

Let's stop mid-scream and steal a moment of sanity
Hold on to your vanities, your profanities
Let me help

Let me tell you a story
'Tis grim and gory

Follow me home, follow me home
Make me feel unsafe
Make me feel like prey
In this jungle of concrete and brick

Your judgements are bullets
With eyes for triggers
**** me.

Intentions, retentions, preventions
Our sinful innocence will be the end of us
We walk into burning buildings
Yet we are not fireproof

We have never been
Fireproof.

Hey, how are you doing
I'm doing just fine
I lied
I'm dying inside.

I'm one foot in the grave
How about you
My mind is like a cave
And it doesn't really matter what I do

But hey how are you
I'm fine
I lied
I'm dying inside

I may crack smiles
But my heart is racing at 60 miles
And behind a closed door
Tears crash to the floor

But hey how are you
I'm doing just fine
I lied
I'm dying in...

you and me not being together,
all the tears
and drunk messages;
you leaving me
and the way your lips
touched hers last week
(you don't know that i know,
but i do);

the fact that i would give you
another chance,
yet you won't ask for it;
craving your kisses, your perfume, your eyes,
your jokes, your compliments,
your messy hair,
your voice whispering
"i can't believe you're here";

getting sick over my broken heart,
knowing i don't have the right
to kiss you ever again
and that you won't sing
love songs to me
anymore

i don't like those things,
i don't, god, not at all,
but i still like you
and i don't know
how to move on