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Annie Jan 2020
Is it already the end?
Only yesterday I felt alive
After all these years
For the very first time

You looked like danger
So I distance myself from you
Every time you reach
I run away like a fool

You see
I intend not to heal
But you, my sweetest
Wish the best for me

Filling my blood with infatuation
Creeping into my bones
Too deep inside me
Before I could even call you ‘home’

Piercing through my skin
Warm, persistent -how a man should be
You fail to see one thing
You’re too good for me
Annie Jan 2020
This life
It’s like a constant wishing
A constant waiting
For something
I am not sure I desire
This hole inside me
Or maybe
I am the hole itself
A tornado
Never settling
No one comes near me
To see my insides
Or do they?
Until they dive
Until they strive
And till —they die
Who am I?
What do I need?
How do I feel?
Back and forth
Withering without growth
I am fading away
Like cigarette smoke
An old joke
Annie Jan 2020

How distant
How near
You’re the only wolf I fear

Beside my nightstand
You stay
Such a safe play

A hungry lion
Hiding in tall grass
Perfect moments never last

Slow, steady
You make no sound
Yet I hear you howl
Each time you step away
Whispering a spell
“Don’t you tell.”
Annie Jan 2020
This dark room
The suffocating walls around my body
I look like a work of art
But abandoned –
Left over centuries to be found
By someone as curious as me
Looking into journals
The *****, untidy, old pamphlets
Merely to prove I once breathed
In the same air
Inhaling alienated emotions
Exhaling like an exploited woman
Piercing your heart with her eyes
Oh, those shovelling eyes
Starry, suffice
Arresting you in her entice
Would you dare to touch
This piece of art
Only to lure another
Annie Jan 2020
Empty we are born
Emptiness we savour
We create
We infuse within
Into the emptiness, we go

Like shadows
Made of nothing, only nothing
Yet when the wind blows
We flutter
Creating empty sounds
Leaving an echo
A trace
Of nothingness
Annie Dec 2019
Internalised screams
Muffled cries
Your silent eyes
Your broken smile

Unspoken confessions
Raging anger
Your beautiful isolation
Your aching voice

It pains me to walk past you
Not saying a word
As if I am ignorant of what I have seen
As if my ignorance would almost make it disappear
Would it?
Annie May 2019
this is all that i am
a fluctuating being

strange to even say
that i have been waiting
and i waited -

but why must I hide
all that i feel
all that i am?

for i know
nothing’s changing
except me
a fluctuating being
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