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I guess, it just felt a little strange. Usually I was always drowning in my thoughts.
To the point where it consumed me. My...my mind...at times,
was my demise,
as much as it also saved me.
But, there were these moments where I lived.
And, it was beautifully tragic because, he knew exactly what it was.
He didn't just hear or see it.
I guess, we as humans,
just feel these moments.
He knew me well,
he understood my laugh.
I learned who I am and why I exist. And I told you to never doubt that I am an extremist.
When I cry, the universe shakes a little. But, when I smile and laugh,
I am selfless.
I just gave and gave my soul to him. He could close his eyes and still dance with every detail.
I was alive.

                      
                          ~ A. Almoudheji
 Dec 2014 Abbey W
M
Sorry
 Dec 2014 Abbey W
M
What am I hoping to find?
My hands smell of cigarettes,
But the nicotine won't calm my mind,

I want to feel alive
Stuck in this world, but I'm blind
Because you left when I was five

Daddy's little girl, ain't so little any more
Can't quit smoking, can't quit drinking, a crazy *** drive
All 'cause she watched Daddy walk out with some *****

When she was small all was well
Even when she heard slam the door
All had to be well, so she wouldn't tell

Why are you back?
In the past, I don't want to dwell.
It's giving me a panic attack.

I'm sorry I'm drinking, I inherited that from you.
I'm sorry that I'm smoking, inherited that too.
I'm sorry I'm *****, guess the depictions of "Daddy issues" are true.
I'm sorry that I'm seventeen, and for everything I do.
 Dec 2014 Abbey W
M
How am I okay
 Dec 2014 Abbey W
M
Five thousand of you read
My secrets
One thousand of you
Good Morning ***

How can I not mind
That you've all seen inside my mind
When nobody in my "real world" knows
The color of my eyes
5047 (Today I hit 5k)
 Dec 2014 Abbey W
M
Little bells
Only time tells
Listen as they ring
Promise not to sing

Music starts slow
But picks up fast- let's go
Bass high
Don't look me in the eye

Fill a pipe
Up the hype
Inhale green
What you've seen

Unzip my jeans
Don't care what it all means
Backseat of my car
No such thing as too far

*Don't talk to me; I don't care who you are.
 Dec 2014 Abbey W
Carolin
On your flesh remains
poetry and stars. I don't
see any scars. The bees
and the birds hum to you
the best of melodies.Gardens
in your eyes is all i see.
When our lips touch i get
to take in all the secrets
you feed to me. I read the
secret messages behind
your tears. They leave me
lost as if i read a message
in a bottle in the middle an
angry sea. No one could ever
take you away from me. I'll
love you for an infinity.
Only us two will get to
exchange this marvelous
experience. Come on come
on darling let's exchange
this experience for an eternity.
For this is our destiny and
you and I were always meant
to be* ~
 Dec 2014 Abbey W
CapsLock
I should've guessed, I should've known.
If there's a lightning, thunder will come.

That I was a guest, this wasn't my home,
but I was just too afraid to be alone.

Winds might change after tomorrow
and the sea my pain could somehow swallow.

But today there's this mountain of sorrow,
that blocks the sun, and makes me feel hollow.
We are burning
We are burning
Oh god the pain
My kingdom
Your kingdom
No light, just flame
Ashes around us
Cinders within
Embers are burning
And I, with him
We are burning
We are burning
Oh god the flames
We are burning
We are burning
**No love, just pain.
 Dec 2014 Abbey W
M
He will

Kiss me hard
Touch me where I am scarred
Throw me out
Scream; shout
Remind me I am worthless
Make me wordless
Use
Abuse

But he will

Love me softly
Come home promptly
Take me out
Ask what I am all about
Remind me that he needs me
Compare me to a beautiful sea
Find me when I am afraid
Give me aide

And he will

*Always cry himself to sleep
 Dec 2014 Abbey W
Echo
~Look, I'm sorry I told you that you are ugly.
Sometimes I just can't believe what I see.
We can be friends, maybe.
I'll tell you how beautiful you are.
Because you are me.
Sometimes I hate you,
Sometimes I don't understand you.
But one thing we can both agree,
Is that I don't mean those things.
And I'm so, so sorry...
....
....
....
that you had to be me. </3~
. . .
 Dec 2014 Abbey W
rufus
Once there was a dreamer,
all he wanted was to run,
but he cannot even walk.
He can't break free of his own chains,
the one given to him since birth.
His mother was never proud of him,
he hid in the shadows of his curtains.
His father never really said anything,
he was always busy with something.
They love him, yes,
but that was not enough.
He wants to claim his own happiness
And so in dreams he says

I want to run,
it would be my dull life's cure.
I want to taste the sun,
I have never felt pure
I am tattered,
tainted with impairment.
A ***** disable,
I want to do things
my feet cannot bear.

I need my freedom,
I need my remedy.

And so in a dream,
he felt so ready,
he didn't hear the gun start,
nor the beating of his heart
This is clarity;
his feet floated,
he was immense,
And so in reality,
when he awoke, he said
It was intense.

All I sensed was the radiating sun,
I didn't do anything but run.
These children have wings, too.
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