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Cedric Feb 2019
Napa-ibig ako sa aking kinakaibigan.
Sa una siguro’y ang pakiramdam ay magaan.
Nagkakilala ng basta-basta, walang dahilan.
Siguro dahil na rin sa  mabuting kapalaran.

Isang araw’y nalaman ko,
Magkapit-bahay lang pala kami.
Lalong nagkalapit ang puso’t damdamin.
Makalipas ang isang taon ng pagkikilala,
Sa dami ng tambay, kain, at gala,
Sa problema ng tropa o kaya’t sa pamilya,
Sa ngiti at ngisi sa bawa’t asaran,
Sa halip na ika’y may pagkasira,
Sa iyong puso na palaging hinihiwa,

Naroon ako sa iyong tabi,
Unti-unting napapangiti,
Napapamahal,
Nahuhulog ang dibdib,
Sa iyong pagkatao’t diwa.

Naaalala ko pa noong ika-siyam ng Mayo,
Bago matapos ang taon ng pag-aaral,
Sa isang buwan magkakahiwalayan na,
Magkokolehiyo na’t iiwan ang mga pinagdaanan.
Umiyak ka sakin habang nakain pa ng pakwan.
Na natatakot lang magsimula ulit,
Na makaranas ng bagong landas,
Na magbago, at maging kung sino man.
Na mahal mo ang iyong mga kaibigan,
Na ayaw mo silang iwanan.

Sinabi ko sayo,
Ika’y minamahal,
Ika’y itinatangi.
Ngunit hindi ko masabi,
Na ako ang magmamahal,
Ako ang magtatangi sa’yo.
Kaya ako’y gumawa ng katwiran,
Na kaming mga kaibigan mo,
Ay naririto lamang.

Ang pag-ibig ay parang nota,
Sa musika ng tadhana,
Sa teatro ng buhay.
Ito’y maligaya,
Upang hikayatin,
Ang ating puso na makinig.
Ngunit hindi kang saya ang ipinaparating.
Kundi’ hirap, lungkot, at paghihinagpis.

Parang emosyonal na gitara,
Na minsan nasisira,
Napuputol ang kwerdas,
Nasasaktan ang kamay,
Nalulumbay sa tono,
Habang humihiyaw,
Kumakanta ng buong puso,
Para sa ating mga sinta.

Dumating ang Agosto,
Miyerkules ng unang linggo,
Sa ika-beintidos ko nalaman,
Na galing pa sa iyong dila,
Na ako’y huli na sa paligsahan,
Na mayroon ng nanalo sa laban.
Ang puso mo’y nasagip na ng iba,
Ika’y nagkwento ng matagal-tagal.
Ang ningning sa iyong mata’y,
Parang ilaw sa entablado,
Nakikita ko ang mga sumasayaw,
Ligaya ang aking nararamdaman,
Habang ang aktor ay ako,
Na iyong tinitigan ng husto.
Pinipilit makinig nang maigi,
Sa kwentong busilak ng pag-ibig.

Ngunit pagkatapos ng kwento,
Naiwan akong mag-isa.
Sumigaw ng wala sa tono,
Sa kanta na puro hiyaw.
Hindi ko inakala,
Na ang kanta ko’y ganito,
Naisulat na ang mga nota,
Ngunit bakit masakit sa tenga?
Sa simula ng ika’y makita,
Nagsimula na ang tugtog.
Ngunit hindi ikaw ang aking kasayaw,
Hindi rin naiwasang mahulog.
Kahit pigilan ko man ang sarili,
Ako’y nahatak ng iyong tunog.
Magaling ka sumagaw,
Kwento mo’y ako’y napaikot.

Napapaisip ako,
Anong nangyari,
Bakit natapos,
Ang ating kanta.
Ng wala man lang paalam.
Ika’y bumula.
Nawala sa aking buhay.
Na para bang multo.
Hindi ko malapitan,
Mahawakan,
Matawag,
Ni mabanggit ang iyong pangalan.
Nawala ang ating teatro,
Nagkahiwalagan ang magkaibigan,
Ang direktor ay lumisan,
Upang maiwasan ang drama.

Napapaisip ako ngayon,
Bakit ikaw pa rin sa ngayon!
Ikaw na multo ng nakaraan,
Ang aking minamahal hanggang ngayon.
A Filipino poem about this girl I became close friends with. Originally a spoken word poetry for other purposes. I decided to post it here because, why not. I’m still in love with her up to this day. Well, it’s only been six months so this will be a long painful process.
Cedric Jan 2019
Dreams of demise,
laughter and joy,
coughing up blood,
as we go about,
celebrating wars.

We revel in victory,
with blood-stained faces.
As we wrestle with our demons,
as we choke on our own blood.
It's human compulsion,
to seek satisfaction,
from laughter,
from tears of joy.

As the world comes to an end,
someone will shout,
"Drink and be merry!"
"For tonight we dine in hell!"
A cliche,
a repeated glorification.

Laugh all you want,
as you shield your eyes,
and open your mouth.
Disregarding your death,
you try to live with a smile.
Be it with yourself alone,
or with families and friends.

Have a beer,
don't be tense.
It's just fear,
and innocence.
Cry a single tear,
jump the fence,
it's coming near,
our laughter and dread.
pain, agony, all the teenager-y angst, the edgy meme lord, the one who uses humor to hide his depression, the teens who glorify wars, the enlisted boys who got won over by propaganda, the sadness of a failing first love, i've spat out what most of use have in common; our spices of youth.
Cedric Dec 2018
Neighbors' talking,
As if it's the end of the world.
Trying to make sense,
Of all of these words.

Two different people,
Who walk past each other.
Two strangers,
With a past together.

Some nights are filled,
Some days are empty.
Two seats never apart,
That ages day in day out.

Words at three o'clock,
Flying past the moon,
Crashing into your mind,
And into my own heart.

Eyes looking at us,
Two who've become one.
Seats apart closing in.
Melding into nothingness.

The eyes blinded by darkness,
Of nothingness and emptiness.
In the moonlight shrouded black.
We talked and got deaf.
getting lost in the nights talking about various things with someone who's there for you only for them to disappear the next day. it's eerie ain't it? the disappearance of a spark, of a flame.
Cedric Dec 2018
A heart cold as ice,
Melts when treated nice.
A few drops of ******,
Put on your lip balm,
Risk and roll the dice!
Let’s not care about your vice!
A few **** of nicotine,
Needles filled with morphine,
Drink your codeine,
Destroy your veins with ******.
Maybe twice,
Maybe thrice.
Forget all your worries,
Burn your autum leaves,
Forget how to live,
Like breath’s stolen by thieves.
A poem about drugs. I’m just an 18 year old boy that hasn’t tasted drugs, or even alcohol and tobacco. It’s just a product of my endless self-control I guess. Except for caffeine, I’m addicted to that.
Cedric Dec 2018
dying is a meme
it's really ironic
it just wont die
a screwdriver?
its not effective
not sharp enough
i stopped though
but my thoughts
filled with memes
just never stop
i tried taking my life before with a screwdriver and yeah its stupid but hey everyone's got their own screws loose
Cedric Dec 2018
dear person with twenty-four letters
how long has it been since we last spoke?
May 9th you were crying,
May 31st you were happy,
June 1st we graduated,
August 20th we started college,
August 21st we went out to Starbucks,
August 22nd my heart broke,
August 23rd i cried for the first time in years,
August 29th you looked at me with disdain,
fast-forward to now and we haven't talked yet

i've been depressed recently
as if my eyes were dyed black and white
to feel alive was to consume caffeine
in hopes that the white crystals give me color
in hopes that the light could penetrate my darkness
i wanted to die just to feel alive
dear person with twenty-four letters
how have you been?
you seem to be happier without me
and it seems our friendship was indeed one-sided
maybe i was just an annoying neighbor to you?
either way i'm satisfied with everything
i deserve this death and i'm sorry
t w e n t y - f o u r
Cedric Oct 2018
To write wasn’t a passion of mine,
When I learned of life?
My brain suddenly sparked a fire.

You see,
We’re always plunged right into the sea!
I can’t help but swim frantically.

I’m not a swimmer though,
So I kept on sinking.
Towards the abyss.

In a dark place,
I found something darker.
The ink of my pen.

Seeing as my darkness doesn’t compare,
I saw my own darkness as light.
Now I write when it’s night.

I couldn’t make any rhymes,
Just incoherent thoughts.
I wasn’t creative enough.

I couldn’t draw any art,
I couldn’t compose any songs.
All I can do was speak.

Now?
I can just speak without a voice.
This pen of mine speaks.

I’m an open book,
Talk to me and I talk back.
My doubt riddle words.

In my darkest days,
Where my voice doesn’t echo back,
I have my pen.

Light isn’t a reflection of others.
It’s a spark within your headspace.
When everything else disappears.
I’m in a dark place, and whenver I’m down here, I write whatever I can. Raw thoughts, incoherent, abstract, random, gibberish, trash. I writ when I’m down, it’s an outlet to plunge myself deeper so I could die and respawn. My creativity doesn’t exist; only destruction on paper.
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