"Lord, if you be at all, be a blade"

"Dance. Nigerians are not sad."
So I must drown myself in loud music
Move my head to meaningless lyrics
Yet, I am plagued by demons of despair
My mind is caving in around me
And I am a mere spectator, yet
"Dance. Nigerians are never sad"

"Choose to be happy. Is this for attention?"
Yes.
Because I will allow myself this torture
To be haunted by this devil sadness
For a mere few seconds of your life
How grand.

"You have made contracts with water spirits"
I do not like fish or even water on my skin
Yet, this seems like the answer
To the evil darkness that clouds my mind
Turning me inside out

I am ill
Still, they offer ignorance
Cage me for "choosing" to be ill

Lord, if you be at all, be a blade
Slay my demons
Ignorance too

Pray

That I may taste of you

Worship at your slender blemishless feet

Feast upon the divine banquet that is your core

Serenade you with praise deserving of your graceful form

That I may traverse the land that is your body

With eyes, hands, lips, tongue...

That I may make your mind my home

That I may always, and forever

Remain in your pulchritudunous presence

Alas, I can not

For you have trapped me in this live cage

Kept me in the proverbial limbo

A bare whisper away

Yet, still screams and echoes apart

The pain weighing heavily on my strained vocal cords

Slowly crushing my fragile heart

But I bear my cross with dignity, the constant torture

And I sit in silence

Watching, waiting

Hoping

In these halls of wailing souls
These halls of ailing babes
Stand I, to them, a fiendish ghole
Needles and tubes, different sizes and grades
Heartless, I ignore their wolf like howls
Gently readying needles of different shades

Their screams echo off these walls
My ears fold upon themselves, deaf to their fear
I must continue with my mission, discarding their shrill calls
I grab a flailing arm, steadily drawing it near
In goes my needle, liquid within, into ****** halls
In hope that their shrill cries don't persevere

In these halls of wailing souls
Silence falls on ailing babes

I
Have
The
Words of
Everlasting

Said
The Surgeon
Who
Died
The Next Morning.

You swore you'd never love again
That you'd hardened your heart
Stiffened the walls of the four chambered *****
That Cupid's arrow would bounce off
That no love could move these stiffened walls
Then...

... Now
Your palms cradle in his palms
Your head gently on his chest, ears counting his heartbeat
His fingers tracing love letters on your back
Eyes closed, savoring the images of him they've captured

Well, Well, Well...
Look who's all lovey dovey
loving and ****...

Silence.
Loud music, high pitched screams
Infant wailings, adult shrills
The cacophony of it all
Silence.

Surrounded by it all
Silence?
Absence of these?
Or peace within me?
My silence, perfect

Silence
Whirring fans, revving engines
Croaking frogs, buzzing flies
The beautiful discord of it all
Silence

So when they sigh and say you're not perfect
That you're too good for them
Too normal and plain
That they don't deserve you
That it's not you, it's them
Wipe your tears
Smile
For imperfect never looked good on anyone else
For too good to be true is a once in a lifetime occurrence
For normal is good, your crazy is just in check
For you deserve the best and should never have to settle
Raise your head
Smile
It really isn't you, you are you and that is always enough
It
Is
Them.