I sat around waiting
Minutes
Hours
Still silence

I pleaded
Begged
Bargained
Talk to me

I don’t even know
What I did wrong
The unknown
Is killing me

Your words
Sting
But your silence
Kills

I wish
I never gave you
The power
To make me feel so worthless

My head says
You were never mine to lose

My heart says
I lost you all the same

Ink floods these pages
Words cause more harm than good
Opening up old wounds
decipher feelings misunderstood

Reminiscing lost love
Analyzing mistakes made
Drowning in past feelings
Remembering all who betrayed

Putting pen to paper
Is my way to cope
Anger, lust, sadness, anxiety
Depression; a slippery *****

I must continue to write
To tear down these walls
Work through my issues
Before death I befall

and one day I realized
you look at her
the way I look at you