I am leaving this totally raw, not edited out parts. If you feel this may offend you, Please don't read. I needed to just vent to somebody so here we are.
I keep trying to forget about you. Not the moments we shared, just you.
I'm trying to forget the way you smelled after a quiet night of dancing.
I'm trying to forget how your eyes twinkled when you talked about your family.
I'm trying to forget the way you cared for me when I told you my darkest secret.
I'm trying to forget how your arms wrapped perfectly around my waist when we hugged.
I’m trying to forget the way you became a emotional wreck when I said I tried to **** myself.
I’m trying to forget the way your beautiful face was illuminated by the fire
I’m trying to forget the love I still have for you.
Everywhere I go I swear I see you. I was walking down the street and I prayed to god that wasn't you in the yellow 2005 punch buggy. When we talked, you only ever had the truck I helped design. Who knows though, You’ve changed since we talked last. But that look the passenger gave me, It was only a look only you could give me. I want close enough to see the two telltale signs it was you, your eyes and your scar. But that look gave me nightmares for many weeks to come. It was haunting and regretful. I could of seen things, But I swear the person said my name.
I thought I saw you today. The gas station that's right in the center of town. I saw someone in the distance and my heart beated out of my chest. I don’t know what I would've done if it was you. Cry, panic, hug you, ignore you, who knows? It’s funny how after all this time, I still can’t seem to get rid of you. What do you want from me? People used to say I was obsessed with you, I'm kinda starting to believe it. Maybe this is love, how would I know? I’m only nearly fifteen. Never been kissed or loved.
I can try and try but I won’t forget you. You’re too much of my heart and soul. You were my best friend. I told you everything, everything. When I think about you all I wanna do is cry. Why I have to go and wreck things i'm not sure. I just wanna know how you are.