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isn't it ironic that happiness is
something humans need?
We spend our life
looking for it.

The definition of happiness
is different for each of us.
For some people being happy
means love themselves.

For other people being happy
means being rich.
And for other people death
is their only happiness.

(m.v.a)
Am I the only one that has their demons feasting upon their souls?
They say it is easy to tie a noose around your mind,
To overcome the urges and temptations of ending your life with a suicide
They don't know the true pain and torment that is going on in my head
An epic battle that leaves me with restless nights in bed
"End your life already" they say, as they prey on me during my weakest hours
Sometimes I give into the voices, carrying the sharp blade to my wrist
Crying as I struggle to mutter three powerful words that keeps me going
Choking on my sobs, my lungs deflate with a desire to say that God loves me
I try to convince myself that God is trying to test my faith
And to just wait, wait and wait
Then my Demons will eventually go AWAY.....



~Imperfect Desire **
 Oct 2017 Eternal Suffering
Middy
I see him on the screen of the TV
As the bold headlines
Of the newspapers flash
"MAN CAUGHT AFTER ATTEMPTED ******
LAST FRIDAY NIGHT"
As a victim's heart took a final beat

The outraged look on the reporter
Says she's mad but she can't say
And the media is screaming
"HOW DARE HE?"
It was an innocent human after all
But was it worth it?

I'm flicking through the article
Says the murderer was imprisoned
Spending the rest of his life
Stuck behind bars in a prison yard

" he's probably regretting it. "
Says Mum, who's sipping her tea
" I wonder what he's thinking. "
Says Dad who's leaving for work
I knew what I was thinking
" was it really worth it? "

Right now he's receiving death
As his punishment
A little much to me
But I suppose he should know
What it's like to be a chalk outline.
He's probably got a rope as a tie
Maybe chair straps as bracelets
His bones turning electric
Maybe he's got a bullet in his brain
His blood on the ground
As the criminal's heart takes
One last beat

But was it worth it?
To commit a crime?
A crime he'd be punished for
Was he asking for suicide?
Or was he mad inside?
Guess that's for the media
to decide
Just a random fact: this is originally a song but I want it as a prom so yeah
 Oct 2017 Eternal Suffering
Middy
Here in this little tale
That I am going tell
Is a simple scenario with three main roles
Starring
A bully, a victim and a bystander

The victim is walking down the hall
And thinking about his life
He lost his father in the lake of sorrow
While his mother fell off it's bridge

The bully is being abused
Which is giving him an excuse
To roam the halls like a prison warden
Or a ghost in a haunted home

The bully sees the victim
They catch each other's eye
An evil glare comes out of the bully's eye

The victim tries to escape
Yet he's caught before he can
And now blood is dripping down
upon the hallway floors
The victim is screaming ****** ******
And begging for mercy
The bully laughs and hits him harder
No remorse or regret

What's the role of the bystander?
Does he run for help?
Does he call out for a teacher?
Does he run and save the victim?
Does he do a thing?

The sad answer is no
He only stands there and stares
More heartless than a body
Made of solid stone

Will you be the victim's hero?
Will you help him out?
Will you join the bully's side?
Will you beat him up?
Will you be a bystander
and not do a thing?
It's up to you
You decide

Who are you going to be?
The hero, the bystander or the bully.
 Oct 2017 Eternal Suffering
Middy
One moment mother was at my left
One moment father was at my right
The next moment they were gone
Simply lost in the crowd
All at once chaos struck
Like lightning on the ground
Sticks and stones were thrown around
With words of hate hurling everywhere
I ran foreward, my movements swift
My heart racing and pounding
My hands were numb, my head was spinning
I ran on as the fight broke out
No one cared, no one saw
They were focused on war and conflict
They didn't care for a single sad child
Who was lost in the crowd
No one to help him
No one to save him
No one to find him in the crowd
 Oct 2017 Eternal Suffering
Middy
Mummy said bad things today
She screamed until she coughed and choked
I don't know why she does those things
And ignores her only child
Daddy hit me hard today
He send me stumbling to my bruised knees
I don't know why he does those things
And hurts his only child
Those kids hurt me at school and ripped my drawing of pain
Into tiny pieces
Why do they do those things
To a humble child?
The teacher never listen
They don't care if I'm dead or alive
I wonder how they'd feel
If their student shot themselves tonight?
If a child died they'd come running
But they'd never come running to me.
 Oct 2017 Eternal Suffering
Middy
" don't tell anyone. " she whispered and clung to my hand.

" I would never. " I responded and sealed the deal.

She came to school seven days ago with bruises, marks and scars.
But she hides them so that only I can see them.

Six days ago I discover her father has gone mad
Becuase he lost his job and suddenly turned bad
He drunk the devil's drink and often hollered with rage
At his daughter who couldn't do a thing

Five days ago her mother died
Of a broken heart
She couldn't take the pain
And let her daughter have it all

Four days ago her funeral was empty except for us
Her father with bloodshot eyes
And smelling of alcohol

Three days ago my loving mother asked " is everything ok? "

I smiled saying it was fine but nothing was ok.

Two days ago she said " I just can't take it anymore.
He's hitting me and hitting me with everything he got "

Yesterday I last saw with tears in her eyes
But didn't listen when I said everything will be alright

Tonight my father knocked at my door
My mother is sobbing on the kitchen floor
He said with a cracked voice that she killed herself last night
She said

" thank you for everything
But I can't take it anymore.
Just live your life and forget about me
Just like everyone else did
Tell the teachers I won't be coming to school today
My homework isn't done
And my work is all gone
Tell everyone in school to not worry about me
I'll be in heaven or hell soon
But I don't know which
I'm running out of room to write
And I just want to say
Remember to speak up someday
Cos silence isn't always golden "
I'm
falling
for
you,
while
you're
getting
over
me.
 Oct 2017 Eternal Suffering
Rae
Her favorite dress
hangs in her closet.
Just like her head
hangs to watch the floor.
The dress sparkles, and
her eyes used to shine
just as bright.
She no longer wears it
in fear that you’ll
be looking up or down it.
She’ll be taken advantage of
one more time
before she says
her final goodbyes.
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