We live in a society full of insecurity
Red lips
Dark eyes
Fake tan.
Forced smiles
Closed eyes
Clenched fists,
Show no weakness
Show no mercy
Small hands on pale stomachs
Eyes constantly searching for ways to rid that extra pound
That extra curve
**** in
Deep breath
Back straight
Every calorie counts.
Is this really the world that we live in?
Is this the life that we wish to lead?
Our lives are no longer determined by the way that we think
They are not dedicated to achieving our dreams
To pursuing our goals
No
The way that we live is based upon the way that we look
And thus, the way that we are treated
We are always going to compare ourselves to another
That is a given
If we don't look good then we aren't happy
Right?
But for others to determine the fates of ourselves depending strictly upon a template of "perfection"?
Perfection is a disease
The very aspect of it plagues your mind
Inhabits your soul
And brings upon an individual an idea of something to achieve
That is nearly impossible to achieve
It is a roller coaster that only goes down
A concoction that only leads to inevitable heartache and pain
A poison that has no known cure
And it hurts
Perfection hurts.

Einstein's Relativity tells us that time slows at fast speeds,
So much so that it stops when travelling at the speed of light.
As you look up at the stars tonight think of this:
The photons that travel across the universe to your retina,
Are created in the depths of a star and destroyed within your eye,
In the same instance.

I won't forget the day you said
That you will love me forever
And with that glow in my finger
I entrusted my life to you
My past
My present
My future
All of me
Is yours.

I don't know why you left me
Sailing alone
You started smiling
While I'm here
Waiting for your help.

You waved your hand
Like boasting
The absence of your ring
While curving a confident grin
From that face I longed to touch
But slowly fading from my eyes.

Into the sea
You left me
Drowning
From the misery
Of your retreat
But, no!
I struggled
To swim
And live
For you
Because I was still hoping
That one day
You'll come back
To rescue me

But you never did.

Now I have learned
To swim against the waves
Reached the shore
And can play with the sea-

   I don't need you anymore.

I now realize the best way to express my love for someone is to release them into the wild
free to become what they wish
encouraging them along their path
as a sister or a brother
how absurd to think
I used to want to control everything
driven by envy or fear
always blocking the light
from reaching my eyes
denying my true self
in a perpetual tailspin
with shovel in hand
digging holes for no reason
reluctant to grow
wings of my own
I now realize the best way to express my love for someone is to forgive them
even if they meant me harm
learning to love without conditions
is the sweetest release of all

it's becoming easier
to hear your name and feel nothing.
Head and Heart fought a battle that only ended
when the Heart swelled with a Love that hurt to hold,
until the Head's gentle reminder
that this was not Love,
it was Pain.
blinding Pain.
but like all blows to the body and mind
Time crushes Pain into a dull ache, a numbness remaining
long in the Heart after the feeling has gone.
but the Head holds the knowledge that this was not Love.
it was Pain.
blinding Pain.
and it's becoming easier.

If I held out my hand
would you take it ?
it's warmth ready to permeate your soul
but what would it tell you of me ?
the scar on my finger
the wrinkling skin
the crooked pinkie
the gnarl on my thumb
stories to be told
if you would only take hold.

A pale, pulsing membrane
Surrounds my inner core
You don't know me
You think you do
But,
i'm alone
And don't want you
To find me
I want to be
Vulnerable and alone
I am
A shining light,
Pale,
And alone.

When your words sting through my heart and leave me broken
- I love you

When the distance between us feels like miles even though we're near
- I love you

When I think of how many fights we've been through
- I love you

When you can't control your anger and burst it all out
- I love you

When the volume of your voice increases and reprimands me
- I love you

When you speak of words of love  and gentleness is in your voice
- I love you  

When you make me feel the luckiest girl in the world
- I love you

When you give me hope and encouragement
- I love you

When I'm wrong and you set me right
- I love you                

When you love me
- I love you