"flawful" poems
It's second nature
To be flawful
But its my third nature
To be destructive towards myself
It's just the way I am for now
Hence "for now"
Apr 17, 2016
Apr 17, 2016 at 9:41 PM UTC
Considering my flaws and all
Could I still be the love of your life?
I'm friendly with majority of the population
I hope it doesn't shy you away
And give you the impression that I am a attention seeker
I utilize my mind almost too often
I hope that it doesn't seem as if I'm heartless
I can talk a little bit too
But I don't think it substitutes for my actions though
I'm violent first then violet second
I'm only careful after I've been clumsy
I had grey hair since the 7th grade
Does that take away from my grade?
My skin texture is somewhat dark, but a bit lesser
My sensitivity is not a mystery
I like to go astray for days
Does that makes you impatient?
My ******** is still in place
Does it take away from the depth of my ***********
Sometimes I don't practice what I preach
But I don't mind being called on my hypocrisy
I hope you don't become obsolete
My flaws and all
Considering all of my flaws I hope you do not withdraw
Oct 5, 2013
Oct 5, 2013 at 1:46 AM UTC
when my pen comes to paper all i can write about is.. you.
ah it's been a while now since we last talked and i haven't been okay since. it's not like i'm ever okay but talking to you made me feel not so numb. not numb. made me feel. you made my heart beat when all i wanted it to do is stop,
you made me feel complete when i was nothing but empty all my life,
you gave me a purpose when i always believed that life has none,
you changed me. completely.
i don't know if it's to better or to worse but i'm thankful to you for both.
some days though, my heart fills up with so much hatred and my lungs fill up with unbounded rage and all i want to do in that moment is make you feel the pain i did when you left. i want you to hurt so much that it becomes unbearable for you to hold on anymore. other days i feel so much regret it's overwhelming and all i want to do is rewind time and make it right again. i need to make it right again. i have to make it right, but i can't. i wonder how i can have so much love in me yet so much hate, it's like i want to choke you to death yet sleep in your arms. your words are like daggers and the more you speak, the more i bleed. the more you speak, the more my chest heaves and i feel like i've lost as much oxygen needed for me to breath. less each time. you'll leave me breathless one day and i don't mean it as a metaphor. it's not a metaphor. my suffering will never be a metaphor because i can't compare. i believe pain is perceived differenlty from one person to another and somehow i feel my suffering is the worst. everyone feels like their suffering is the worst.
with you, it's always a charade. a guess. a thought. a feeling. you're unpredictable, and god i love this about you. you're not perfect. perfect is flawless and you're flawful and with every flaw i yet get to discover, i fall deeper in love. i fall deep. i fall but i get up. i get up to prove you wrong, oh how i love to do that. maybe i am a little bit too obsessed with you? okay too much and you've got no idea how much i hate myself for it. i'm the sinner and my sin was getting attached to you. ugh, when will this go away?
when will you go away?
when will i ever stop thinking about you?
when will i move on?
questions that i have no answers to and answers i think too much about.
you didn't love me, you did not care or at least not the way i wanted you to. one sided. my feelings are always one sided. sometimes i wish i was born with none.
you left.
you left.
you ******* left and you are not coming back and i know it's my fault but you took my feelings with you, and i can't feel anything anymore. i need to feel. i need to feel in order to move on and i guess you didn't want that. you crave attention and you know i am willing to give you all of mine, for that you used me. betrayed me. more than once. and yet, i keep thinking so good of you because i believe the good inside you overlaps the bad. you're ****** up but that's what made me love you. i love you.
Oct 16, 2014
Oct 16, 2014 at 12:52 PM UTC
let me tell you why we should believe
in healing, in getting better
in improving, in getting stronger.
the thing is
we're flawful, right?
and do you realize that
we're talking about flaw?
flaws, have flaws too!
why?
because they're flaws, idiot!
don't you get it?
our weakness, have weakness!
their weakness, yes exactly
we can use them
to our own advantages
to win over our insecurities
to build our confidence again
and to go beyond what we thought
was our limits.
and more importantly
to pick our fragments of pain
and change them into
our own gem of victory.
remember this :
if we have flaws
flaws have their own flaws too.
fight your fears
and hide your tears, gentlemen.
the battle has only just begun.
Sep 6, 2016
Sep 6, 2016 at 4:49 AM UTC
Holiday cheers, the spirits now here to up the downpit moods! Where swinger's go singers, and companionship is far beyond due!
Stringed up longing, stuffed feathered innocent pleasures where the gravy spells of finer of many dinings!!
Bring good tidings you attitude bringer, you dope sick slinger, thine gun has drawn itself to fast!!!! Parties awake the deadened vines, where ghastly projectors contract the powers of unearthly glass!!!
The world moves to slow!, STOP, look ahead fantasizer, the escalated wheels to fast!!!
Sodomatic beauty, input newbie, your thistles are spreading the fences, where trashcans and benches distinguish flawful fate!!!
A fulfillment of vows, a timeless volgate. Proverbial collection's detest the furnaced crucible, where Loophole's are bound and bagged to be stench!!!!
Glider of turbulance, father of remembrance, forget what thine holy teacher has taught you to be???
May 13, 2015
May 13, 2015 at 7:16 AM UTC
She's a blooming flower
In night mime, she's wild
The sunshine as her sign,
Of day she's gone.
Her light is bleaming
Like a star she shines
In twilight she blinks
In moonlight she hides
When darkness became her;
She's the night, a cat without fur
She naked and free
Yet the others won't like her further
She's as fat as the wind
In summer she blows
Like dark mush on an arabian sunrise
She's warm and she glows
She's flawful and detached
Like a bird, chirping at day
It hurt your ears but satisfy your soul
She's the sun's night owl.
Apr 17, 2018
Apr 17, 2018 at 11:50 PM UTC
My mind takes it reserved spot on the tip of a turning top
Am I the one causing it to spin?
To stop and think puts pressure on my assumptions
But maybe I should instead look within
Whats in the bag? Whats in the bag?
An army of misread metaphors
A 4th dimensional space, is mine to taste
But only I can open up that door
I grew strong legs to carry my bagagge
To leave it behind wasn't even a thought
I tried to outrun my problems, cupid and God
But its love itself that has me caught
I took my reserved spot in the chair of an open mind
I didn't want to look in the mirror because I was scared of what I'd see
A flawful analogy of pure sensuality
And it turns out that I actually love me.
Jan 3, 2017
Jan 3, 2017 at 11:29 PM UTC
If you think
You're in love with me
You're dead wrong.
I will hurt you someday
Maybe not today
Or many other day
But I would.
I told you so many times
How flawful I am
But you never seem to agree.
I told you who I really am
How terrible I can be
And how awful it would be.
You're not allowed to love me
So does everyone else.
I am allowed to love anyone
Because I don't care if love hurts me.
I am allowed to care for anyone
Because I don't care if people leave me.
I don't know.
Maybe it's just me.
But why are you still here
Smiling at me?
Jul 21, 2016
Jul 21, 2016 at 6:23 AM UTC
It's easy to look at something...anything... and think it has reached the standard of perfection...
But nothing of this Earth is perfect, so our standard is nothing more then a hope or a lie
We are blinded by the flawful world we live in... we have forgot what perfection truly and only is
Perfection is Holy, Perfect, Sinless, and Blameless, and Eternal...Something we will never grasp or understand on Earth...
Never underestimate or misuse that perfect word... perfect.. for there is a far more greater meaning to it, then we will ever understand...
Aug 23, 2018
Aug 23, 2018 at 5:29 PM UTC
Eleven fifty three.
i can't think, it's getting too close
what will happen in the end,
will it be happy, morose?
i can't function, i can't.
Eleven fifty four.
****
a minute closer to oblivion,
a minute farther from ascension,
please tell me there's a heaven.
Eleven fifty five.
**** i haven't done everything i've wanted to, i didn't i didn't i didn't
but i couldn't.
i wouldn't.
motivation, where are you?
happiness, you too?
help, i'm still the same little lost girl as i was five years ago.
Eleven fifty six.
i accept it.
death here i come,
Apocalypse, trample me with your hooves.
i'm prepared in not being prepared,
but rather, by being accepting.
whatever you've to offer, Ragnarok,
i'm ready.
Eleven fifty seven.
three more.
three more until this hell is over,
and then I enter another hell,
or heaven.
but there is no heaven for a heathen hiding under a catholic's beliefs.
there is hell for those mentally unwell,
those who have attempted to enter it during life
on their own accord.
i'm just a shell of what i once was,
seeking the same thing i used to be.
Eleven fifty eight.
two.
through all my sorrows,
losses,
and tomorrows,
i fear i haven't learned everything i could have.
flawful, still,
awful, still.
soon i'll just be
still.
Eleven fifty nine.
i'm sorry mother,
forgive me father,
i love you brother,
i have no sister.
to my friends,
farewell,
and to my enemies,
i'll be seeing you in hell.
let's put everything behind, and accept each other, alright?
alright.
Twelve o'clock.
Midnight.
May 18, 2017
May 18, 2017 at 1:08 AM UTC