Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
There's never been a middle ground for me.
I can be terrifyingly drowning in my insecurities and self-pity one minute
then the loftiest songbird, soaring quaintly without worries the next.
The grey must be a boring place.
And in all optimism, surely there is someone who will accept me
for all my madness and sanity.
yeah it's 3:59 in the morning,
so what? there's ink in my veins and
a bottle of ***** in my system.
I'm bleeding novels here
and it's a rare blood type I've got.

The words pour from severed wounds
and stain the carpet, bed sheets,
the counter tops and floor tiles.
shrieks from my roommate,
"what the hell's going on?!
someone call an ambulance!"

(darkness)

yeah it's 7:03 in the morning,
so what? I woke up attached to a machine
and it wasn't even the government.
chuckles from the nurses,
"he's got a sense of humor this one"

every last letter fled my body
until I collapsed.
and suddenly, I understood
that death isn't about flowers, tombstones,
black dresses or sullen faces.
it's about the words that were left unsaid.
Anxiety
A ball of prickling fire tearing beneath my sternum.
Fear
A bolt of electric ripping through my veins.
Depression
A cloud so thick is suffocates my soul.
Anorexia
Starving the outside from within.
Bulimia
Inhaling the world and purging it back.
Failure
Being crushed by society for all of the above .....

And still wondering why oh why is it me???

Why?
 Nov 2014 Vivian Cunniffe
gr
society teaches you to worry about everything…
every promise left to be broken, every word left to be said.
every person left to distrust, every world left to die.
every love left to deceive, every future left to fade.
every hope left to suffer, every breath left to perish.

society doesn't teach you about…*
every promise left to be kept, every word left to be covert.
every person left to trust, every world left to live.
every love left to support, every  future left to brighten.
every hope left to comfort, every breath left to take.

*~ g.r.
 May 2014 Vivian Cunniffe
Tryst
Her wide-brim hat was pointed, and worn with ne'er a tilt
Her midnight robe was flowing, and wove from satin silk
Her Besom broom was hazel-hilted, twigged with fresh cut birch
As she flew o'er the hill, until she spied a rocky perch

The hill was trapped in moons light, caught in its silken nets
And grizzled trees were swaying casting eerie silhouettes
A howling wind came moaning, as it wailed a haunting sound
When her swishing broom came whooshing, as she swept o'er the ground

She alighted on the hill top, landing dainty on her toes
And took a tattered grimoire which she held up to her nose
She raised a magic talisman and cast an ancient spell
Then she waited through the gloaming, till midnight chimed its bell

The hill stood gravely silent, as the wind restrained its breath
The grass and flowers wilted and released their scent of death
The shadows neath the trees became alive and took on shape
And ghostly figures rose, as Hallows Eve called them awake

The sounds of horse drawn carriages, came trundling up the hill
Whilst babbling jeering voices exorcised the silent still
A sudden gust of wind called out the names of those condemned
Each manacled and chained up, as they rode to meet their end

As time echoed its memories, she watched the scene unfold
The victims forced unwillingly, to climb upon the scaffold
Some offered up the Lord’s Prayer, and ne'er a word was stumbled
They took a final breath of life, and into hell they tumbled

Their bodies swung ungainly, as they swayed a ghastly dance
With lifeless spectral faces locked into a stone-like trance
Their deathly shrouds were pale, reflected in moons silken sheen
And she watched as they cavorted, ne'er attempt to intervene

They slunk back into shadows, at the fading of the night
The hill reprieved from darkness by the early morning light
The ritual was completed, as she whispered them goodbye
And she climbed onto her hazel broom and kicked into the sky

On Gallows Hill neath stars and moon they hung
And ne'er a one had done the world a wrong
I gave you the utmost honesty and respect I could. I'm sorry I couldn't make you and your shallow heart happy. Maybe someday you'll make someone passionate about your existence, but that'll never be me. Good riddance. I only say this with tender care and love. And only present to you the face that I show to everyone else as well, even if it happens to be an ugly one; hope you truly appreciate at least that.
and now we’re standing in a dark room full

of colors and we left our morals in the bowl

with our only means of leaving. we started 

singing lyrics to songs we didn’t know,

but we got lost in the beat so nothing

else really mattered; we became our own beat

and you couldn’t help but smile at my

mistakes because i laughed at yours.

and when you leave, you couldn’t help

but care for my safety and i couldn’t 

even make you smile but mine was sufficient

enough. i can give you heaven, darling.

and it’s just so hard to think when my brain

is full of making pictures about how the sky

would look in your eyes

and how the ocean smells

on your breathe and how the sun looks 

when it alters your hair. tell me

when it’s appropriate that i hold your skin

without wandering wallowing away with

nowhere to head but the top of mine.

play with my words and pick out each syllable

you hate and throw it in the ocean, i need to

hear the waves speak to me at least once.

hold on to my memories because

i want your dna on them, i want to know what it

feels like to intertwine you within my brain.
summer 2011. **** i thought you were the best thing that ever happened to me. what a gem
They say it’s okay in the end.
But I can think of so many times
when it wasn’t.
Or maybe that’s what death says
when he takes your hand.
”It’s okay…”
There's nothing you can give me that is strong enough to stand
The things I cause myself to feel, I'm holding my own hand
And if there's any mercy left I don't know where it is
I only sense its presence when I barely want to live
Between the waves of heaviness my head & heart collide
Instead of showing anything I try to run and hide
The days are catching up to me, I shiver and I shake
I cannot mask the fever that is keeping me awake
I've written down so many words I partially explain
Reduce the possibility of going half insane
The backwardness of this becomes a trigger made of ink
I swallow it because I can't remember how to think
Next page