DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, for M.H.K. :)

I sat
startled by the dead rock
talked to its wind, responding with a nod
chatting:
I suppose people out of date
out of stock
been looked at so questioned
what should

a promise I shook
hands with to keep for
good, to keep for worse
already knowing the door handle if the
door stood up for a logical force

for the familiarity to
pertain, individuality speaking about protectiveness of a sword
I suppose myself aware of purple
leaves in certain
to keep the looped
downfall, truly to the word

flipping through leftover
meals to minds sold
experience essenced of trailed up
thought after the show
footsteps pressing footsteps to
the underworld living for one
demolished, two-thirds to go

                                                             ------ravenfeels

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, it is the leap of the known knows of the unknowns:)

be the wither
be the pain
I've written the
wholes of
that one pathed tenth trench and
paced lane of an ever
a ten a twelfth of three sixes
an ever
again, I'd come to come
through in neat shall
the pleasure of today is the same of the
pleasure
of that year

now come
my memory into the eye
onto the foreseen
one through an eye

for the written to them shall
burn to the past to
commit lie
draining my pen
onto the forges
of day in
sublime tortures
dimming my life my tent swallowed by
a fox
a god's a falcon's a once sought
eye

so trace my words I write
here I write have written today for
they shall be past of some lesson of
a mean just the same tell
them to read tell them to listen well
indeed for a poet's riddles shall
trick and deceive tellers the
tortures till moons till
the one till of hell

                                                                   -----ravenfeels

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, who's watching me now?: I'm not liking the capitals:)

I don't like people seeing me think
I feel exposed----
to the lots
of the knows
It's like they're reading my mind
they're reading my thoughts
It's like they're reading my lines
they're reading my poems
It's like they're reading my rhymes
they're reading my tone

But I know that they're not watching
it's just a mindless look
But I know that they're not
when they can't see behind my lots
But I know that they're not
when they throw off comments
shooting their shots
in ******* me off
in slaughtering nods
in not ending with dots
in being a being of a being bot
& confinement is their knot
when their tongues are off dirt
& a look is now a flirt
& the means to being humane
is one luxurious walk in a desert
& the question is an alert
gotta be sane in here by effort

Who's watching who?
Who's watching me now?
You have to be reserved
or else you pay for the blurt?
Get yourself onto the lane
or else a doom of an inert
so 'go ahead,
I support dancing :
just not under the rain'
sorry you'll stain?
so go
go
go
go compose yourself to the knows
drink your tea
keep it nursed
do it all
all rehearsed
die of life
die of thirst
don't count me, me don't assert
me no insert
in your park
in your scene
in your perch
Go get your tickets
go buy your theme
to that seat
to that concert
of the so called dream
                                                           ­                                ------ravenfeels

survival mode Liban
the logos of the statement just like any other
some curse it like it's some occasion
maybe it just needed a vocation
instead of the maybe
so the intelligence of its diction comes at cost
that one of its mind jailing mine
the ability of writing today is the lack of writing tomorrow
why does it have to be
for the words
to be a hostage
of the momentum of a pen
the golden age of today for me is the golden age of tomorrow
again with the maybe
or maybe not
already noted a 'useless' spot
the older I get the smaller I feel
from the exposure to the lots of the real
the younger I was the bigger I felt
from here
from the bubble of the lots of the real

                                                           ­                                -------ravenfeels

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, how many journals do you go throughout the year?

he fades
for real this time
I'm losing sleep over myself
not over him
over his rhymes
if I can prove his existence in my brain
I can't
it doesn't even exist
even if it does
still not the same
his effigy is one for the flames to eat
and for the bridge to burn
on my poems his body lays
a skeleton my feet passes in between
thoroughly
between the lines standing in the way
dust coming back to follow me
with no second thought
or maybe just one
one thought between me & myself
how many more journals can I go through?
through which I go out of throughout the year
through which I go out of thought about cleaning up
some fear
of this dust from all over my poems
so give me back my poems
the winters that went away
those are mine to keep
to show them
until the last page
of it
of it all
and don't read them
because then you'd have to call

                                                           ­                                     ------ravefeels

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, 2:45 on WED 9-VIII-'23------

comin’ back here, meetin’ up
crumblin’ in a domino’s loop, when
order expires, we’ll be in this famine too
even on this sea deck, the army’s list check
all track of them names
what they gave me
clearly none match here
so what’s with the deal?

some of those bodies lack the means to tolerate
look at the branches processin’ its roots’ betrayal
if you don’t give in to death you give devastate
washin’ its trail, burnin’ on pale
instead of goin’ on this life to bail

letter in green, waterin’ hands hangin’ in misery
emotional swallow, a liquid to this numb thing
to him towards, wordin’ is a war
doubled reality
jump the war zone the freezing state bone
as you recall the real

some of those bodies lack the means to tolerate
drowning this pride is one’s own self’s defeat enslaved
if you don’t give in to death you give devastate
washin’ its trail, burnin’ on pale
instead of goin’ on this life to bail

those branches would come to rejoice
rejoice the tree’s roots and its crown
matterin’ some asphalt upon
upon which feet would come to frown
and they would soldier their way
soldierin’ their way into the crowd
like it’s the March of their lives
the life they would brink to survive
sheddin’ the fears that they bound
to cancel the love of a waitin’ wife

some of those bodies lack the means to tolerate
black eyes will come to nurse the rednesses’ space
you think you see his skin, when you see his stain
washin’ its trail, burnin’ on pale
he doesn’t want to know the norm
the serve of them flames, huggin’ them blades
not minding the storm
washin’ its trail, burnin’ on pale
instead of goin’ on this life to bail

                                                           ­                                ------ravenfeels

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, did I ever mention that my account's password is actually a repeated line on this page?(stupidity 101) :)

sometimes the blocking of the words
is better than them being said unfinished
& sometimes the say of them unfinished
is better than them being blocked
so which one is it of the above
if the battle of the must & the mustn't shall redeem
so which one is it all along
if the consequences of the last aren't showing the next
so which one is it
if it must or it mustn't

                                                        ­          ------ravenfeels

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, that May ****, for this May birth:)

into the walk
of an empty talk
to the truths of the blue
& the holds of that hue
yet aimlessly
with the ones who planted me
yet anonymously
as if not once it was me
it is still
eventhough I'm existing without paying the bill
keen
scared of some '******' spleen
again I become
a foretell I welcome
for the chimes to ting
& the walkdown interrupted by a ring
like the one of the pathed light
except there was a flight
of every single emotional wheel
indistinguishable from them those of the infamous feels
& I seem to foget!
so remember what was, is, & will be dealt
upon this eye
the twitch of it in the blink of the lie
the man of the glance
not giving a double chance
of the one with the mystery, hence
so I go back to where nothing makes sense
    
                                                           ------ravenfeels

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, it's not a word, but I use it : so it is :>

would you in an ever
think deeply till death?

would you in an ever
know how to terminate your breath?

would you in an ever
remember the houred reality?

would you in an ever
live whatever the calamity?

would you in an ever
speak it all knowing it's madness?

would you ever
in an ever
of an ever
of the evers
think deeply till death?

would you ever
in an ever
of an ever
of the evers
know how to terminate your breath?

                                                        ­                                   ------ravenfeels

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, may MAY (as usual) ......

& YET, I BET
yourself would be the 'second' worse you have met

I have a wish
a wish that wouldn't make me a fish
I want to escape that bowl
only for three months whole
then get back through
& I won't mind staying into
because I have seen the dream when I couldn't
& now I know even though if I shouldn't
I shall be stopped by others
yet I shall not stop me or bother
I know I demand a golden wish
yet my life is haunted by a fish
(& the dwell on 'yet' ends to begin)

the problem is that it's not only in the other shoals
it's that it's in the sea overall


                                                                                            -----ravenfeels

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, I just lied to myself for a while:)

in you, in me, in us
this roof under the dust
I come to say I come to find
that to me, to myself I have lied
somethings are dwelling
becoming too much I'm questioning the act of selling
selling my paper words from hell
with a bow tie all wrapped as if feeling well
books mock me as if it's another world & all
when in fact the sun is cascading its shadow on the wall
the resentment in me could never deliver
& I wonder my sanity of head & liver
the resentment in us could never betray the kind
yet the betrayal we continue to allow in the mind
retaining what has been buried
is a lost dream I am worried
my ankle is healed but I'm still jumping on one foot
so what is it being alive? even if I knew don't know if I would!
therefore I came out of the prison tower
hence amusement never shook me in the hour
I imagine the streets are mine
for me to go back to the life of time
for I couldn't get past
what I've missed & the joy that didn't last
it's in the trickles of firm lips
it's in the darkness of road trips
radio silence & it seems AGAIN
some failed expressions denying experiences would never end
no harmony in what I see
just spurts of selfishness & jealousy
oh & I hoped for their wry smiles
even those, march to ghost until they die
coldness comes to dry on doors of mine and
for irritation to have a voice then it would be silenced
where to throw the blame? never my thing
we throw it as a hot potato & it just stings

                                                         ­             ------ravenfeels

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, in the a.m. :

I would like to say
with no poetic disarray
your name on my tongue is on repeat
so scared to say it out while asleep

                                                                                                   -----ravenfeels

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, July writes._.


prisoner am I
on the walls looking for who am I
in the shiver of the tea
the past steals of that sea
the invisible scratches on my back
the ones that scratch a roof to sleep painted black
all them those of the stacked shelves in handy
couldn't leave a page not a blank of the empty
does it rain in summer still?
because it's getting dusty on that exiled mountain hill
poems stale
the clock speaks in brail
blood trickles the nails
& the bitting has the audacity to fail
my toes to the feet demand a detach
not a new thing like a tree & its branch

                                                         ­                 ------ravenfeels

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, happy WednesdaY:)

wanting my right to be wrong
wanting my faith idolizing the strong
what is it with that await for the peace?
when I already could dig that peace in me
                                                                                      
                                                                                                ------ravenfeels

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, I-IV-'22:

on that table
four arms shook, double faking the illusion she stable
or is it a matter of strive to be crippled, disabled?
a hold on for the called dear life, inhibit the verb able?
yet life is not the content it holds in a cable
otherwise a single stumble would be fatal
& them feels embraced
are all the things that you shall face
on that table
struggling to bare the meaning it labels
but for the mind of mine
reasoning a reason is not a define
yet the feel in the moment it roots for it fills
& like a child & like a breath after her ****
despite papers scattered upon seals of nature
some lines stand up to nurture that wooden creature

                                                       ­                                 --------ravenfeels

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, still moving?

that ego of mine
will be the death of that spine
that nose in the sky
in dooms when thinking a fly
like black & white tiles
still moving right & left not high
can't help the crave of the cold
the one for the illusionary stillness been sold
yet what coldness do you see?
the one that shelters a shell of pure heat in me?
foreigners despise them borders
them feels excluding a hexagonal soldier
do you indulge that part of my be?
the one them thoughts seem to poke my free?
or that urge to write the sights surrounding
worship the floor those souls float a grounding
don't ask which is which
let it comedown on me let it slip let it stitch
a reflection of the past some mindless ghosts fabricated
a reason to a reason to be reasoned on my chapters situated
clinging lines & yearning for the words to utter record letters
something for the universe to swallow in feathers
have them digestions rip in shreds their tongues
nauseate the trachea from those lungs
but I rest it forgive forgave & let it be away
forget not shall stay
tired of the things they never admit to a said
yet my satisfaction of looking back entrapped a bled
makes me deny a defeat
for the respite of jubilance wasn't a retreat
pushed my feet to that lake
put a pen to a paper & called me on stake
never have I ever said yes to a dawn
for that dusk my hopes come clean & drawn
jumping on one single foot loose
holding my own form on an one-ended-noose

                                                ­                      ------ravenfeels

DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, herself to be on a quest<3

a foot behind the other about to leave
loneliness drums for the view yet to be believed
about a hug in foot a broken bridge kills
for the other arms to take the hint as a drill
woke her up although in her mind still
since the double life she pursues is not even half filled
he stood facing the ear that won't listen
that one the dream won’t truthfully forbid and
took a leap to the window pane
that old one the one disguising the upcoming refrain
this time herself to be on a quest along her demeanor
some blinding rage won't save her without a screen intervener
like tapes of the past are piecing
like some pride displayed upon eyes reigning
now her mind is self doubting
unreasoning then shouting

                                                                                         ------ravenfeels