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Tyler Smiley May 2019
Hot breeze, 90 degrees. My shirt was soaking wet, but I couldn’t tell if it was from the sweat between my ******* or condensed beer bottle dripage falling from above. My days consisted of no work, all play. Vomiting out every ounce of fluid my body could hold once the clock struck 2AM, only to refuse the water and replenish myself with champagne in the morning. Filling myself with bubbles, hoping it’d make me more bubbly. For it was the season of the sun, of life, of vibrance- but I only seemed to be able to drag myself out from under my drunken mistake ridden sheets once night time arrived. I thrived in the darkness. It made it easier to put my tongue in places it shouldn’t have been, whether that be on a random salty neck or a burning bottle of tequila. It was the same cycle everyday, my goal to forget more than the day before. Until I didn’t remember anything anymore. I desperately wanted to find my way back to my old self, but it was left on the side of a road less traveled. A route with winding trails littered with shards of broken whisky bottles, and with every step I took more blood was drawn. But I was finally letting myself feel the pain instead of forcing its head down to drown in the overflowing liquid in my throat. Hotter than hell, late August brought a new fire to my eyes. I still don’t know how I survived the sweet, sweet summertime.
Summertime, boyfriends, and other things that nearly killed me is a short prose collection by me. Check back next week for part 2!
Tyler Smiley May 2019
I’ve been dipping my toes
into his daydream.

The one where silhouettes
dance across the walls,
and unzipped dresses leak off shoulders
like guttered water finding its way
to the soil after a downpour.

The floorboards become puddled silk,
and I realize I wouldn’t mind drowning
as long as it’s in his endless stream of lust.
Tyler Smiley May 2019
You, the dead of winter.
I, the reincarnation of spring.
You’re my gospel, yet
you’ve never believed in faith.

You, the stinger of a honey bee.
I, sunshine and lemon trees.
Always giving you enough sugar
to make life sticky sweet,

but the lemonade seems to remain sour.
I still pour a glass and see it half full,
but you seem to look right past and
view the world half empty.

I experience life through a wide
angle lens, full technicolor.
But you always have tunnel vision,
my monochromatic lover.
Tyler Smiley Dec 2018
I forget that my palms
are not your arched back,
as I continue to dig
deep ruby crescents
into thick skin
late in the night.
Tyler Smiley Dec 2018
I’ve been walking down the city streets,
wild night life running on disco feet.

I hear you with every step I take,
the loud cement cannot take your place.

Rushing blood in cracked bones,
your body was my home,
an avenue not of my own.

But people change with the weather-
saying the sun will make them better,
but 3 straight days of rain just left us
wetter than ever.

4 am reflections in the puddles of what
we used to be, imitations of you and me,
I’m so sick of reliving our tainted history.
Tyler Smiley Nov 2018
Headache of a girl
stepping on sobbing floorboards,
rusty pipes and lonely nights.
I start my own fires,
tend to sweat out kerosene.

Rinse myself with ***** water
dripping from cracks above.
Break open a window-
smoggy air love, right hand slug.

You’re still sound asleep,
yet I stand in the city
interrupted by sirens
and memories of you.

What a pity.
Tyler Smiley Nov 2018
He’s never good for mouth play,
is only skin deep. Same old, same.
His heart, his tongue, his sweat
don’t come every night and day.
Is the sweet smell worth it?

I lie and wait,
you pick and choose.
But in the end,
there is no I in her.
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