Lesson learned is not a phrase I am about to utter
because my teacher developed a stutter
told me I needed to lie low
let it blow over
I wasn’t one for sailing but I knew the wind would take me where I needed to go
so I blew kisses into the distance
asked for no assistance
but got well wishes as if I was on my last breath
lying in a hospital bed
the food is better than you expect
if your taste buds haven't dried out yet
I’m slowly coming undone
a dwindling of perception
I swear I saw you one time
trying to catch my kiss
I missed I know I did
having a direction was never my thing
I'm glad you were my compass
but now the needle keeps spinning
I cannot find my north.

4 A.M.
A body lays slain
facedown in a pool of blood
a halo to match her name
stabbed 4 times in the chest
a street worker
like all the rest
who would want to her hurt her?
- to put her to rest
your guess is as good as mine
she may have not been the best
but someone was prepared to cross that line.
————————
An innocent as far as I could tell
first night on the job
tell me who goes to hell?
- those who give or those who rob
her next of kin were called
so that they could name her
once at birth and now at death
twice they tried to save her
an umbilical cord wrapped around her neck
a noose just two months earlier
maybe now she got her wish
released back to the sea
this angel fish.

I could be the biggest romantic in the world
or just the biggest idiot
still trying to figure that out
maybe that makes me the latter
I could have had her
I could have had them all
but pity the fool
that puts heart before pleasure
what is his measure?
is it inches or love
when is too much enough?
are they tears of joy or of pain
I tried to explain I always do
but words are worthless unless true
so here it is my unbridled mind
watch me unwind its music box
the music stopped and now silence
hide me in your quietness, my love
no never mine, I lie
in memory and in bed
with words I wed
what never was
a never love.

You’re such a tease you ease between nonchalant and fervour • I favour the latter the scattershot words of intent • you invent new ways to torture me oh fortunate me to be the subject of such cruelty • what is a man to do that’s caught in the crosshairs of a shrew • to reciprocate with such hapless abandon or offer up random excuses why he must refuse this attention • my heart tried to stage an intervention but the other members rejected the motion • it's already had some wear and tear so please can you just handle with care.

Happy new year
to all of my friends
I wish you were here
to celebrate the end
the end of a decade
that's already over
so let's ride the parade
don't look over your shoulder
I lost someone dear
and I know you have too
but let's make one thing clear
that all things renew
new relationships
new beginnings
I'm thankful for you all 
so let's see what this year brings
whatever may befall.

When I'm old and gray, you may feed me with a spoon
like I was a child today dancing around the room
pretend you are a plane dropping food like bombs
or even a choo choo train going nom nom nom
sit down next to me and let's do a jigsaw puzzle
reassure me constantly when I get in a muddle
help me climb the stairs step by step
be the one who cares if I break my neck
tuck me into bed you can read me a story
tell me all the things you did until I am snoring
so when I'm old and gray you may feed me with a spoon
until then just smile and say,then will be too soon..

Listen if you please
to my twisted soliloquy
I’m not from around here
I’m just rumors on a breeze
I come from afar
some say the mountains
others the stars
like an absent friend
you will remember me I promise
or else your names Thomas
mine is Adam the first
I am the atoms that burst
the very fabric of being
the fabric of genes
denim, denial, destiny, defile
I've been here a while
and I will be here a while longer
even though I don't belong here
the oceans don't know my depths
the mountains have not reached my peaks
all these beliefs I have not kept
for there is something greater that I seek
but I cannot utter its name
some may call it love
but that has garnered too much fame
for you've mistook love for what is fake
because it's not something you can take
it's as simple as a breeze
the same that carried me
yet unlike I it has no needs
it's as full as the oceans
and tall as the mountains
I had the notion
that I could just pen
write my own legend
but that too must END