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There’s a lot of heat when all eight
of us suite-mates get together.
I might have mentioned it somewhere.
We’re like surround sound,
eight car alarms going off together,
it’s jabberwocky by an established team.

It can get frantic and maybe frightening
for the uninitiated or inhibited.
Some of us are pretty boy-crazy
and there’s a mix-in of twinkling girl-crazy too.
We’re basey, bugzee, spaceheads and freaks,
yeah, we're the whole emotional spice rack.

“She’s a good person to **** time with,”
is pretty high praise around here
because we have so little free time.
But these are good people to **** time with.

And we’re portable, we travel, we invade,
we’re crazy young women who’ve got it made.
So if you’re coming at us, trying to enter our enclave,
you better be brave or a situational upgrade.
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Songs for this:
No New Friends (feat. Sia, Diplo & Labrinth) by LSD
Lysergic Bliss by of Montreal
Freedom Is Free by Chicano Batman
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slang…
basey = a cool loser, nice but a bit odd, a ****** with style
bugzee = slightly crazy
spaceheads = people who talk about weird things
BLT Merriam Webster word of the day challenge 02/21/25:
Jabberwocky = meaningless speech or communication.
There’s an old joke, “Procrastinate NOW, because
the sooner you fall behind, the longer you’ll have to catch up.”
Ha ha.

While a lot of students around here, even the good ones,  
are procrastinators, I’m a diagnosed pre-crastinator.
I obsess over syllabuses and start things immediately.
I've got rough drafts of things due three months from now.
I’m a planner. Leisure time makes me itch.

I say that to say this, I’m reaping my rewards.
There’s a palpable layer of fret in the air.
Everyone's (the seniors) talking about their theses,
and how they need to start it—first thing yesterday.
I just listen, playing Flappy Bird on my phone, because I’m done.

When my professor handed my thesis paper back the other day,
he said, “This is good.” At first, I was delighted, quietly rocking it inside.
Then I floundered, becoming somewhat indignant. Why’d he sound surprised? Because I handed it in a little (80 days) early?
But soon enough, I was back to happiness.
I’ll have to defend it one day, but I’ll go first, wait and see.

Shall we wax poetic?

I’m like the sea, always restless
and I enjoy the flavor of honest effort.
I dub snark, and the little, jealous glances,
I blunt them with chey smiles, while thinking,
‘I’ll row my boat, and you row yours—just a little slower.’

Let them whisper me freakish
though I win a thousand crowns,
the real pleasure lies in my gun slinger’s sang-froid,
to finish the commission first and be the best.
.
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Songs for this:
Let Me Down Easy by Gang of Youths
Let Me Go by CAKE
BLT Merriam Webster word of the day challenge 02/20/25:
Flounder = struggle in knowing what to think, do or say.

dub = ignore
chey = shy
sang-froid = a coolness, under pressure
Anais Vionet Feb 11
I’m standing in the common room, turning in circles. I’ve so many things to do, all at once, I can’t figure out which way to jump. A time management problem, I suppose, maybe I should have taken that 1 credit
‘project management’ class I sloughed off. We live and we learn.

Leong was sitting, leg crossed on the red corduroy couch reading.
“Can you do me a favor?” I asked her sweetly (a poker player would call that a ‘tell’).
“I can’t get involved,” she replied, not even looking up, “I have my own problems.”
I thought for a second, “What problems do you have?” (We talk, I know ALL of her problems.)
“Internal problems,” she said, “the kind you can’t see.”
“I need to take a lab tonight, so I can go to a secret society meeting tomorrow,” I confessed, “can I swipe your ID, when I put my laundry in the dryer, so it notifies you to pick it up?”

“You’re telling me about a secret meeting?” she asked, finally looking up, “AND, you’re asking me to get your laundry?“ she added devilishly, “Is it because I’m Chinese? THATs racist.”
“Ok” I laughed, “that was funny,” I congratulated her, “I hadn’t thought of THAT.” She fairly preened at the complement. “WELL?” I followed up, giving her a head-tilt.
“On the hook,” she said, meaning her ID was hanging on the 3M scotch fastener by her door.
“Thanks,” I said, “you’re a lifesaver—a cherry lifesaver—I updogged.” I’d finally found a direction.
“Zong gwai,” she mumbled, turning back to her book.
*Zong gwai (Cantonese) literally means "encounter a ghost," but the colloquial meaning is "**** right."

As I walked up science hill to the extra lab. I was so tired, it felt like I fell asleep between each step, but every step jarred me awake—it was like a child playing with a light switch.
As I got up near the main entrance, there were these two guys I don’t know standing around.
“Hey there,” one of them said. At first I thought he was going to ask for something innocuous, like directions but he broke into a smirk and I realized this was some kind of catcall and I took an angle away from him.

When I first started school, three years ago, you’d get catcalled once or twice a week, at most, but it seems like it’s more frequent now, three or four times a week (roommates compare notes) like some barrier is breaking down. What nomenclature would you use, for a catcalling guy? Most of ours are unfavorable.

There were other people around, so I wasn’t worried about him—still, he stepped towards me—smirking.
“Are there any other mediocre men where you come from?” I inquired across the distance, still angling away.
“Who said I’m mediocre?” he asked, but his smirk slipped and he stopped moving. I was 20 feet from the door.
“If I’m gonna bouncy with someone,” I shared sarcastically, “it has to be done with authenticity.”
“My GPA is solidly in the median,” he admitted, with a half chuckle, as I crossed the center point of our arch.
“I’m sure you’re being your best self,” I assured him, as the automatic doors to the lab opened and I entered, shaking my head to myself.
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Songs for this:
When Did We Stop by New Move
Stopping a Garden Hose With Your Thumb by The Narcissist Cookbook
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Our cast:
Leong, (roommate) 21, a ‘molecular, cellular, and developmental biology major,’ is from Macau, China - the Las Vegas of Asia and she’s a proud communist (don’t knock it til you’ve tried it). Growing up, I lived in Shenzhen China (about 30 miles from Macau) we both speak Cantonese (maybe why we were paired?) and we're able to talk a lot of secret trash together.

Your author, a simple country girl from Athens, Georgia is also a molecular biophysics and biochemistry major (pre-med).
BLT Merriam Webster word of the day challenge 01/25/25:
Nomenclature = the name and designation of something.
Graeme Feb 1
I eagerly await another day of attempting to meet new people.
Students amble through our campus, up and down the hill,
Listening to music, staring at the ground, or caught up in their head,
Past a new potential friend: me.

I’ve got my friends, ones of the highest quality,
In the city, just half an hour north of me.
I don’t see them much, though, and I have no way to leave.
We can’t speak much, either; they’ve got jobs and loves and lives.

So, to maximize my social potential, I put myself to work.
I’ve mastered the art and science alike of socializing;
“Use this register”; “smile at this distance”; “speak to listen, don’t wait to talk”.
Studying it all extensively to figure out what’s best.

They’re everywhere, I hear, in the dozens, maybe hundreds.
Folks just like me: trying to overcome the awkward and build a bond.
So where are they all, and why do my paintings remain unseen?
Why do my endless chemistry attempts produce no reaction?

Well, a girl said “hello” in the stairwell as I headed for my dorm.
She smiled, seeming to be one of few to acknowledge my attempts.
Just a friendly gesture, sure, yet I think of it often, her unaware of its value.
I cross paths with many daily, yet I’ve seen no interaction like it since.

I let my confidence carry me toward new opportunities and situations I desire,
Yet, whenever I go to approach them, something nags at me.
A hand that pulls me back; a wall that stops me in my tracks.
It’s Anxiety, and he’s back, worse than ever.

Within this conundrum lies a great irony; a twist that tears at my conscience.
The closer I get to making friends, the tighter Anxiety’s grasp grips me.
“No, what if your words are taken wrong?”. “The bond won’t last.” “...But your eating…”
The reward, even if achieved, seems not to be without caveats, he claims.

He’s right; at a distance, I am safe; nobody can see me struggle to eat,
Yet this sentences me to suffer the animosity of my esophagus in solitude.
I am shielded from criticism, watchful eyes, and the projections of my mind,
Yet I am my most isolated in the most social of the places I’ve ever lived.

So, I eagerly await that new day of attempting to meet new people.
Fellow loners who walk ‘cross pathways, through buildings, and to their dorms.
Cradling their digital safety net in-hand, perhaps fearing what I fear,
Past their new potential friend.
Finished on 2023-09-24.

From my first day at a new university until the end of September 2023, I had very few people to talk to at school, and I did everything I could to fix that. As I did, though, anxiety started to keep me from doing it, and fighting it was a battle in itself. This chronicles how it felt, roughly in chronological order throughout the weeks. Real feelings and anecdotes from my first few weeks are baked in.
Graeme Feb 1
On days like this, I am reminded of a feeling once foreign to me
A concept I’d only caught from books and from movies.
One that crushes yet contains no mass
That cripples heart and brain alike yet bears no blade.

It is the bitter, biting brutality of winter with no fire nearby to curl up to
Nipping at the heart and leaving it crisp with melancholy.
It is a plague which I seem to have regretfully caught
Despite having recently become so very aware of how to use its cure.

The girl across the hall opens her door and produces a weary, sigh with her exit
Perhaps a plea for an ear to listen or another to exist with.
She passes by my open doorway silently, contradicting herself
Our pleas for a social volley cast together into the blizzard.

I imagine she feels that same apprehension; hesitation
Or perhaps she had something to do.
The simple smile of another among the thousands here
Would be an ember of joy sufficient to set my hearth alight for days.

I crave that warmth like few things I have craved before
So close by, yet more scarce than it’s ever been.
Chatter was once my sun, and I basking endlessly below
How I yearn for summer in this raging storm.
Written on 2023-02-28. This is about a day in winter where I had my dorm room door propped open in an attempt to interact with the students living with me while I worked. It was a profoundly quiet dorm, and I thought that the regular practice of putting myself in view would help combat that and add some liveliness. The apparent apathy of the few people that walked by proved me wrong, and it made me feel very isolated in a college that prided itself on community and connections.
Anais Vionet Jan 18
It’s hard to meet someone serious at college. Everyone’s busy,
self-centeredly grinding away at their dreams. So much so that
people tell you to not even try (especially as a freshman).

I was mostly at ease with myself—as a freshman. I had an
excellent skincare routine—it was downright luxuriant, and it
kept me going, through that romantically baren and lonely year.

But we humans hope—we buy lotto tickets to dream on—though we know the awful math. We Gen Z’s seem to have our own unique brand of loneliness, born of covid and Internet-age experience.

My romantic expectations, sophomore year, were low—ok, unmeasurable.

Looking around was depressing. There were socially awkward STEM majors, jocks, frat men (sure the world’s laid-out just for them) and ‘CSOM Bros" (business majors more interested in parlaying my Grandmère’s money than me) and the elusive, emotionally reserved, ‘regular guys.’

But the unexpected can happen. We all know how crowded campus coffee shops are—the students move in and out in tides as noisy as the real, salty ocean. And then there you were, a rumpled, 25-year-old doctoral student—from another world—asking to share my table.

The loudest thing in that room was your sense of stillness. You seemed to be a new and distinct species, and as we talked, you seemed to somehow smooth my anxious edges. After a few meets, the thought, ‘I really like this guy,’ seemed to have its own gravity.

We somehow managed to thread the ‘too busy to care’ dynamic, and as time went by, you helped me channel my absurd, fiery, pastel-painted, first-love, early-twenty girlhood heat into something longer lasting, deep and authentic. Congratulations! It’s been two years.

Separating now, would be like removing the salt from the sea.
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Songs for this:
Playing House by Kudu
So Much Mine by The Story
After Last Night by The Revlons
BLT Merriam Webster word of the day challenge 01/16/25:
Parlay = to use something to get something of greater value.
A boy once dreamt, not of teaching's creed,
But paths adorned with ambition's fire.
From commerce halls, where dreams proceed,
To B.Ed’s realm, bound by fate’s quagmire.

In SOE's corridors, where silence sways,
Among 250 souls, yet so alone.
The boy endured, through mundane days,
With steadfast hope, his dreams his own.

Mistakes of youth cast him in this tide,
Yet serendipity graced his strife.
Two mentors wise walked close beside,
Illuming the shadows of this life.

Peers spoke of gossip, in trivial vein,
While his sharp edges dulled in their midst.
Their demeaning chatter, a source of disdain,
Yet his lotus heart in mud persist.

Through Somai Bagh’s halls, he shone so bright,
In online realms, his spark sustained.
A sweet supervisor, her smile’s soft light,
Ignored his mischief, her patience unfeigned.

With winter’s breath, by fog’s embrace,
Chai warmed the bonds of hearts once new.
Serendipity smiled, her radiant face,
In her friendship, his solace grew.

To Manu ma'am's P. lab, he carried his art,
His words, his soul, unveiled that day.
A poet’s courage, a beating heart,
Recited verses in bold array.

The end now nears, of this tale so vast,
A chapter closes, yet dreams ignite.
Through trials endured, the boy holds fast,
A hero poised to claim his light.

So here he stands, with resolve anew,
Charming, steadfast, and free of dread.
It’s Kanishk, dear reader, bidding adieu,
A lotus grown where others tread.
                                                                 By:- KANISHK
Kanishk Baghel Dec 2024
In pedagogy's realm, where lessons unfold,
I met her strict gaze, her demeanor austere,
A teacher whose presence both warm and cold,
Her voice a blend of command and cheer.

In Semester Two, my steps hesitant, slow,
Her firm stance loomed like an iron wall,
Yet the seeds of respect began to grow,
When Semester Three softened her call.

Room 49 FOE became my portal to awe,
Her smile disarmed yet discipline reigned,
“Kanishk, come in,” her words without flaw,
Though her sternness at times left me restrained.

Her walk commands the road she strides,
Confidence fused with urgency's flare,
At times in specs, a doctor she hides,
With wisdom glowing beyond compare.

Her knowledge vast, like a boundless sea,
Economics and tech she wove with art,
A motherly guide who cared endlessly,
With wisdom and strength in equal part.

Her life a balance of work and kin,
Two little children and duties immense,
Her strides spoke of purpose deep within,
A journey of hiatus, grace, and sense.

For every doubt, she’s always there,
Even at midnight, her patience intact,
Her soft-spoken words, her thoughtful care,
A bond of guidance and trust compact.

Though scolded once for childish play,
Her affection remains, steady and strong,
I’ll ask about Pahal Horizon without delay,
And hope our bond endures lifelong.
                                                                By: - KANISHK
Anais Vionet Nov 2024
Life at 21, do you remember it?
Things rush at you, hit you, from all directions.
Any small decision can turn into a major plot beat.

What are our lives anyway but the sum of our decisions?
Opportunities contract and expand around us, like breathing—
and what fills those lungs are our test scores and faculty opinion.

College is a land of dreams—we’re all dream catchers—on our own paths, but the paths are mazes shrouded in haze, tumblers in need of combinations, variants that we must learn and memorize though it drains our communal blood.

At test times, the silence in libraries and coffeehouses is deafening,
full, as they are, of hunched-back phantoms toiling on books or blue-lit screens. If it sounds stressful and dramatic—it is. It’s not a time to get raddled—it’s all a big test.

Your world contracts to the sterile and dry— the facts and the moments needed to gather and order them.

That’s why we love breaks. Fall, Summer, Christmas, Thanksgiving—any flavor—break.

In fact, Lisa and I are on break now, I’m typing, on a MacBook Air, in a helicopter, screaming towards Manhattan.

If we don’t die in this shaky, 250mph, 3000-feet out-over Long Island Sound, cricket-like contraption, we’re going to have a great time—if we do nothing but sleep, hug our families and eat turkey—a great time.
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Songs for this:
Little Hercules by Trisha Yearwood
Constant Craving by k.d. lang
Merriam Webster word of the day challenge 11/14/24:
Raddled = confused or befuddled or broken-down and worn.
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