how much longer will I wait for butterflies bursting red at the wings, fiery orange curling their tips into flames

today is long and heavy like the space before a goodbye
i watch a moss-backed turtle float on clouds above the water and I think of you,
of coiled garter snakes and soft pink sunsets, of warm lentil soup and white zinfadel and fern forests and I know,
I would not be enough for you

settled in the space between sun and moon I am two parts water, one part fire,
I am boiling hot springs set on a river deep, bubbling and breaking and gasping for air,
I am summer thunderstorm, hot rain and violent life and love without control,
I am ocean fissure, the space between, red hot lava shifting slowly like a lover beneath the sheets
I am self-contradiction, all crab-shell and shape-shifter and the answerer of my own questions,
I am crystal cave heart and loose leaf mind, waterfall eyes and moonshine smile, you cannot tame me but you cannot let me go

Amalgamate,
Don’t hesitate.
Don’t forget to participate

If two things fit
Conglomerate
That’s it!

Five sea turtles bask,
the evening sun glinting off their shelled backs.
The sand glistening with each waves retreat.
Like statues, the turtle guardians.

One cracks an eye, slow,
peeks at those watching,
pointing,
then closes the eye again.
Not concerned with human things,
it's only desire to store sun fire
deep under it's scale skin,
bring it back underwater
and heat its soul within.

beware atomic attack!
1950s civil defense
duck and cover drills
Bert the turtle
showed us the way

flash of light - duck and cover!

Come out of your shell but don’t throw by the wayside what’s there to protect you.

Lost in the sea.
          Lost in your eyes.
                     Lost in your love.
      
Am I lost in the depth of the         ocean?  

Waves crash against the shore. So are you the ocean, if I’m the shore?        
      
           I see a sea turtle.
A large one with a colorful glow.

It opens my eyes and I can see the life inside you.
                It’s bright.
                         And warm.

But when you wrap your arms around me, they’re cold and dark.  

      Are we like dolphins and lions?    
Different from so many perspectives and meant to stay apart.

      But again, the lion chases    
              dolphins, while they run.          
       And they do outrun him,       because the lion can’t swim.
     Because the lion will drown into
             the depth of the ocean.

So if I let myself drown and die for your love. Will you push me back onto the shore and let the lions, whom are so afraid of drowning take me.
          And tear me apart,
                     piece by piece,
                            part by part.
        And heart by heart.

I’m not the only one who’s afraid to let myself drown into a love of another.

     There will always be one ocean,    
              that lets you drown.
      And one that pushes you away.

      There will always be one shore,    
            that’s brave enough to try.  
     And one that will never get wet,    
          because it’s too afraid to die.

A walk on the beach, calm and content
A slow stride with intent
Directions are clearly written
For the water tempts with graceful position
"Come to me, and take a swim
I will shelter you, please come on in
Little green speckled walker
I, the Ocean, call you son and daughter."
With a joyous pitter
And an excited patter
Water to toes,
Then feet, legs, and tummy, all the way to little turtle’s nose.
Protection and freedom within the ocean
A soft sweet lullaby motion