My Mother-In-Law lives with me,
and boy does she need some help;
She doesn't brush her hair anymore,
she's given up on herself.
~
Her outlook is mostly negative,
for she sees no good at all;
I which she was a Horse,
so I could put her in a Stall.
~
I cringe whenever she wants to cook,
for a Pancake she can't even flip;
I'd love to take her for a ride,
and push her off of a cliff.
~
She's become a bit, "Man Crazy,"
she'd take anyone who can breath;
So I took her to a Nursing Home,
she replied, "Too old for me."
~
I began to feel quite sorry for her,
so a "Blind Date" I one day arranged;
He brought her home, 'fore ten p.m.,
and said "She was much too strange."
~
Her bleach-blonde wig kept slipping,
and her teeth, they wouldn't stay in;
I believe she doesn't stand a chance,
of finding a date, e'er again.
~
She has no taste in men,
so I never allow her to date;
I keep her hidden inside all day,
'less Bigfoot wants to mate.
~
It seems I'm truly stuck with her,
so I'll take the good with the bad;
For she has a never-ending love,
that I am so blessed to have.
I truly love her. She loves it when I write insulting poems about her.
