I don't know you, but you're a part of me
With every beat, every lyric, every note, every key
And now that you're gone, I feel so lost, so empty
As though I'll spend life searching for you
Until we meet, perhaps in the afterlife
To ask you, why did you leave like this?
Why leave the earth to shine bright in the sky,
To be a revered, inspiring, light, lasting only a moment?
Help guide us home, lead us to a better place
Give us a sign, anything, to know that you're well
Remind us you're there, and you'll never be forgotten
I've never seen you live, how I wish I did
Perhaps I should have tried harder
Perhaps I should have listened more
Had I known you'd be gone now...
I would've done things differently.

lazy warm water
with fuzz patch green on large rock
young minnows swimming

Incubus Drive
is when me and the neighbours fall out
it's not just the volume
furniture moving bass
but I have to sing
full shout
I know all the words
you see
cos I played it
so many ******* times
it's ingrained on my beer brain
all my inhibitions
blown out
I'm on stage
in front of the microphone
air guitar
I'm no Brandon Boyd
but by Christ I'm on fire tonight

But rocks are hard
And buttocks are soft
And the two do not
Good bedfellows make
And I cannot remain here,

And so I climb,
Again,
Scrabble painfully up the scarp,
Again,
Towards the light

Of a sun which seems
So very far
And unfeeling
In an azure sky that
Holds little hope

But each painful inch
Is one less in the shade,
Every focused lever against the
Gravity of pain and loss
Removes me from its grasp

A little more,
Until eventually the suns rays
Start to penetrate the cloak
Of my depressed state
And even my wracked muscles

Start to warm and,
At the cliff top from whence I fell,
I spy that rock which my back
Missed still stood in place
Where it always was

Did I lean the wrong way
Or did it wobble?
Or was it a bit of both?
Either way it feels stable now
A rock

On which I pause to lean

i stood on large rock
someone asked me for small help
i weakly chose no

What is poetry?
A form of self expression?
A release to the emotions bearing weight on your soul?
A chance at hope in the most dire of times?

I find myself asking these questions as I stray towards words during my visits to rock bottom. When life has once again wronged me, and these emotions are brewing into an unforgiving storm. There are no expectations here. There is no room for outside judgment. It is just me, a pen, and an empty sheet of paper.

So why is it, that through the thunder of this storm, as the rain pelts me to my core, I find myself met with expectations of my own self expression? Trying to mold these feelings into something presentable, acceptable, beautiful, even.

These emotions know no boundary, they feel no sympathy toward the rules of the world, they only crave release from being locked inside for far too long. They are messy, angry, chaotic, uncomfortable. There is no perfect format to present them in. There is no time to mend them into something pleasing. There is only expression.

Dug up an earthworm
the longest I've ever seen
while paving a garden path
to make my home look clean.

Thought it wouldn't suit the worm
to be trapped under so much rock,
so I tossed him over to my neighbour
who has lots of lawn around his block.

Hoped the worm would appreciate
that my strategy has saved his day,
when a crow came swooping down,
picked him up and flew away.

Kulang ka sa tulog,
Kaya 'di ka nananaginip,
Mulat ang mga mata,
Ngunit sarado ang isip,
Lumilipad sa kalawakan,
Habang humihigop ng hangin,
Mayrong puting usok,
Pumapalibot sa paligid,
May batong gumugulong,
Pinapaikot yung plastik,
tik,
tik,
tik,
Dinig mo ang pag-ikot ng kamay ng orasan,
Para bang may nagbabantay,
Andun sa dilim,
Pati yung nakaraan,
Dinadalaw ang buhay,
Takot ang sumisilip,
Ayaw kang lubayan,
Pag huminto ka saglit,
Mauubusan ka ng laman,
Gusto mo ay palaban,
Maglalaro ka ng apoy,
Kahit magka-sunugan,
Dahil matindi ang pangangailangan,
Yung tawag ng laman,
Pag nariyan sa harapan,
Hindi mo na matanggihan