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girlinflames Sep 10
There are things in life
That seem so frightening—
Yet, as time goes by,
They reveal themselves
To be so simple
That I wonder
Why I didn’t start sooner.
girlinflames Sep 8
The clock ticking,
The hours running—
Like sand through my fingers.

I hope
I am the hand,
Not the time
Passing by.
Sometimes I linger in the tub
Long past reason,
‘Til water cools, dulling senses.

I stay as it drains completely-
Feeling weightless.

I wonder:
If I stay long enough,
Will I wash away too?
i miss the simple life
in the way we all do.
bringing water
from the well –
the blue one –
at every street corner.
collecting firewood
so the winter stock would last,
toasting bread on the fireplace
brushed with a garlic clove,
and salt.

i remember the signs
in windows,
people selling eggs.
creeping into the barn,
scared of spiders
and chickens,
but still collecting them,
while still warm,
and fresh.

we’d scavenge
at the edge of town –
never allowed,
but we went anyway.
swimming in ***** waters,
slick with chemicals
and gasoline,
we didn’t have allergies
to the world.
just rolled around
in grass and dirt,
not caring
what lay beneath,
or might bite.

once, we let the cat taste
the tomato soup
from my mother’s bowl,
while she was on the loo.
we snickered,
choking on laughter,
watching her savour
every spoonful.
we were partners in crime,
my brother and i.

i even miss the smell
of the old theatre.
its worn-out curtains
heavy with nerves
as we danced,
competed,
recited poems,
pretended to be
one of the great
figures of the past,
and lay on the cold,
hardwood floor,
covered in dust.

i could list
these memories for ages.
what it felt like
to be a child.
weightless.
magical.
curious,
and bright.
i wanted to grow up
too quickly.
when i should
have held on tight.
this one is about the unshakable warmth of childhood memories, and the ache of realising you rushed to leave them behind.
heidi Aug 12
I gaze into a smudged mirror.
Is that truly my reflection?
Or had I done a poor job cleaning the glass?
the road to self-love is a bumpy one
girlinflames Aug 17
If we get back together,
I will be firm.
I will know how to speak
what I want
and how to negotiate.

I will know how to be
one of a kind.

But—
are we still worth it?

I know I am.
girlinflames Aug 18
Was this really what I wanted?
Did it have to be this way?

Was there nothing left
for our story to become?

Santiago and Veronica
would probably be upset.
girlinflames Aug 16
It aches in my gut
when I think about
how you must be feeling.

Your wife left.
Your wife didn’t want you anymore.

Are you blaming yourself?
Have you been crying—
like you cried to me that day,
saying the pain was worse
than when you lost your brother?

Is it because I’m still alive?
Because the possibility
of something being done
still exists?
girlinflames Aug 30
I wonder if there’s still hope for us.
If, in the future,
your prayers will be answered.

I admit—
I was shaken.
I always wanted you to be
the spiritual man,
my pastor, my leader,
the priest of our home.

But I learned
you were never that man.

It hurts—
because I left for that reason.
And now you wake
at three in the morning
to pray for us—
because you lost me.

I was valuable,
and I didn’t even know it myself.
girlinflames Aug 19
Why did you come back into my life?
Look at the trouble you’re causing—
you’ve shaken all my edges,
as you would say.

I know you want me,
but I’ve been through a marriage.
I know what it means
to give yourself in a way
that maybe, in your idea of love,
doesn’t even exist yet.

Your love still feels liquid.
I need something solid,
real—
not imagined,
not illusory.

In the end,
I need you to change.
Because I have.

My standards are higher now.
Will you be able to reach them?
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