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k e i May 2022
it’s just how it was.
and so things ended up the way they did.
we were quite a pair;
what with my impulsiveness and your rationality.
as i took a step back, each time i recognized the danger in your eyes, flickers unleashed.
this rendezvous meant meeting somewhere a little nearer than halfway,
not without leaving a breadcrumb trail of weariness.

see, we didn’t get around to the part of burning bridges-yellow and orange and blue flames standing tall. neither did we try dousing ourselves in gasoline just so it could stay alive, sparks like flirtatious moths attune to life.

all that we’ve resorted to was crossing the bridge and rightly so. for all we ever wanted was to learn the language the city lights spoke upon the ripples delving into atlantis’ reach. there wasn’t a need to get past the platform, plainly standing there already felt right.

this is what those weeks were all for. open-door kisses and treacherous things in the dark.
the laughing fits and slow dancing in your balcony at 2am, acoustics faint on your speakers were just ways we came up with in order to **** time.

things ended up the way they did.
your messages left unopened, my secrets i’ve bared onto your lips and your tongue was the ink you’ve etched yours with on my skin. for a while it meant more than that, we meant more than just a jet’s smoke trail of fleeting stars crash landing upon reality. we could only get to pretend for so long that the crash wouldn’t occur even as we’ve made an agreement that we’d still be alright and remain with an exchange of warm smiles and inviting eyes like the first encounter. but pretending could only sit so well in my chest but it can’t quite counteract this particular feeling rushing with intensity, an outrage that’s only worsened as those exchanges are kept.

so forgive me if i couldn’t keep contact, if all your calls go to voicemail-and i try not to listen to them but ultimately fail. the only compromise i aid to is to not reply.

that’s just how it was.
things ended up the way they did.
the passionate flames surrounded us keeping a close watch so they wouldn't engulf us
we were just bridge watchers content on not going beyond nor under


-“bridge watchers.”
you can find more of my poetry on: manicpixiedeadgirl.tumblr.com
Havran Apr 2022
"I am back in the house where I grew up in,
but every piece of me is homesick for You."
~D.A.
grace Apr 2022
She no longer personified the young flower bud,
that she happened upon last summer,
sweet and delicate, swaying carefree in a field of wildflowers.

No-
after all, she had endured heavy rain,
fierce storms, and unrelenting winds from the West.

She was bold in her quest for sunlight,
and had learnt to stand, unbending,
resistant, in the face of adversity;

No-one was more deserving of the petals
that blossomed for all to see.
kate Apr 2022
habang naglalakad ako sa lupain ng mga sirang pangarap, mayroon akong pangitain sa napakaraming bagay. ang mga paghihinagpis tila baga'y tumutulong upang madagdagan ang aking pasan sa mundo. aking napagtanto na ang kaligayahan ay isang kalinlangan lamang. sa aking pagkalumbay at pakiramdam ng disorientasyon, buong buhay ko'y nabuhay sa takot. ang mundo'y pinamumunuan ng mga batas ng poot na matatagpuan sa iba't ibang dako. kaya naman ay ang mga nakararanas ng dalisay na kaligayahan ay isang hindi pangkaraniwang pangyayari.

sa bawat araw ng aking paghihirap, umaasang makakaahon sa ilang butil ng kasaklaman ngunit sa kaibuturan ko, wala akong ibang makikita kungdi ang kasuklaman ng buhay. patuloy akong naglalakad sa mga anino upang maghanap ng liwanag ngunit aking napagtanto'y malinaw kong nakikita na wala nang ibang paraan upang makalabas pa sa suliraning ito.

sa aking buong pagkabuhay, dala-dala ko ang mga basag na pag-asa't mga tipak na salamin. ang tanging sinag ng araw ang natitirang kislap ng aking mga masidhing lunggati sa rurok ng tagumpay. kung iyong titignan ang marikit na lilim ng gintong apoy na nagngangalit sa kanluran, ito ay ang aking mga minimithi na nakalilim sa puwang ng kalangitang asul. nais kong lumipad nang malaya tulad ng isang ibon sa kalawakan. sa mga kislap ng mga tala'y nakatingin, hinihiling na sana ang panagimpan ko'y dinggin. lahat ng iya'y hindi makakamtan sapagkat ako'y isang hamak na bata lamang na nangangarap ng imposible. pinapanood malunod ang aking sariling mundo mula sa aking bintana'y natatanto, mga pangarap ko'y dahan-dahang inaanod.
sa araw-araw na aking paglalakbay sa mga repleksyon ng kadiliman, isa lang ang aking katanungan, isang ilusyon lamang ba ang kapayapaang aking matagal nang inaasam?
may mga pangarap talaga tayong mahirap makamit at ito'y hanggang ilusyon na lamang.
Havran Apr 2022
"Wherever you are
is where I call my home."
~D.A.
Havran Apr 2022
"Far away,
but never truly apart."
~D.A.
Robert McQuate Apr 2022
The Södenberg sisters sing to me tonight,
Their words sending me far from this slightly cold balcony,
To a realm of asphalt and dusty wind.

For my first 10 years there were no roads,
But a plethora of paths,
Criss crossing,
Winding to and fro,
Foot beaten little things in a great forest,
Filled with trees, creeks, waterfalls, and animals,
Birds singing beautiful songs as they sail through the trees,
Squirrels chattering from their perches amongst the great branches,
Whitetails observing my progress of the child .

As a young boy I'd sprint down these paths,
Unheeding of the odd roots that were placed along the paths,
So happy to just be moving forward,
To see what played around the next bend.

The next 10 years were simple things,
A two lane town road,
Buildings of my hometown on lined either side,
Their facades as they were,
Before the place of my forefathers got too big too fast,
Where all it's citizens knew my parents,
And by extention, me,
The birds and squirrels still there,
Although their number greatly diminished.

My pace was greatly diminished,
No longer some great sprint,
But a gentle jog,
Taking in the familiar sites,
But excited to leave this place,
Impatient for a change of scenery and anticipating some great adventure.

The next 3 were a treacherous yet exciting road,
A winding mountain pass,
Steep sloaped and lined with switchbacks,
Giving beautiful mountain vista views,
But with this new road also came the realization,
That the road could be a dangerous thing,
One slip could give way to a great fall,
The once gentle jog gave way to a cautious walk,
Wary of foot placement and step,
No birds here,
No squirrels,
But instead of the rumble of far off thunder,
And the howling of distant wolves.

Then came the next four,
The thunder no longer far off,
The wolf howls no longer distant,
The asphalt cracked and split,
Closed in on both sides by a thick and menacing wood,
And through the darkness of the nearly moonless night the darting shapes of beasts could be seen.

Rain slashing down,
Galing winds battering me,
My body worn down,
My walk but a limp,
Taking my broken self forward,
One dragging step after another,
A constant struggle to find the energy to make it one step further,
To find reason to keep going.

But like some great magic trick the wooding cleared,
The rain stopped,
And the wolves pulled back.

It was here that I found you next to me.

This new road is a bit cracked,
A bit disused,
The desert beautiful with Mesas to either side,
My pace quickened,
No longer a slogging trudging thing,
But also not a run,
A relaxing stride that feels good and steady,
Churning onward to the mountains in the distance.

I look to you and you smile,
You smile back,
And it is here that I see hawks up above,
A fox to the far right,
Observing these travelers passing through it's lands.

No longer an unlined face,
Bearded and festooned with a smattering of scars,
Earned through foolish fights and terrible tumbles,
But gladly won and worn all the same,
Sun kissed skin taking in the pleasant warm arid air.

I know not where this road leads,
But the excitement returns once more,
And that I no longer need to travel it alone,
That traveling is never meant to be done all on one's own,
That it's the company that makes the trip worth it.

With that the duo's song ends,
And I am transported back to this balcony,
The air still clung to with the slipping grasp of winter's last vestiges,
And it's begrudging release so close at hand,
Bring forward new beginnings,
And new roads to be traversed.
First aid kit-My silver linings
Heavy Hearted Apr 2022
Red & blue sage in remembrance of you
Gladiolus, carnations-
pink poppies too.

While foxglove protects
With larkspur and flax,
The windflowers wilt but always grow back.

White lilies for hope
And forget-me-nots true,
an innocence captured in their ambiguous blue.

Griefs Pink and white orchids,
Support’s crimson rose-
the healing of hyacinth,

flowers & prose.
written in  tribute, to the family of a good friend.
louella Apr 2022
it hurts cause i remember those nights when my favorite song blared on the ipad and i laughed and cried with you. i miss feeling alive while dancing around my small room, dreaming in color, not just in black and white. i feel the longing in my body to go back home- to you. weeks passed and i still smelled your scent in every corner, everywhere i turned. i remember happiness like it was some foreign good, so beautiful yet horrifying. i miss that feeling. the winter frost was frigid and i was miserable, but at least i was having fun, making memories. life grew stronger and stronger and i became weaker with a busted back. now all i want is my last year self back.
sometimes i despise the past and sometimes i miss the past

4/6/22
m lang Feb 2022
it was the frustration.
the frustration caused by
your arbitrary outbursts of anger,
whilst vomiting words of resentment and regret.
words that melted into my veins,
tarnishing my blood
with the ink that fueled my writers hand.

the dependency and obligations that i had to be yours,
and yours only.
the suffocation entrapped me
              (((inside of a cage)))
                       so small.
once i finally remembered,
"i could spread my wings."
i realized your latch couldn't hold me captive.

the salty tears that endlessly
stained my cheeks,
swelled my eyes,
and shortened my breath.
the emotions, the motions,
my body was speaking to me.
i was finally able to listen.

the intensity of emotions
without regard for
                           emotional intelligence.
it never made for a successful relationship,
but it sure as hell made for a good story.

our love ended at the cost of many cons,
but it came with a recipe for beautiful prose.
1-31-2022
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