I neither want to live nor die
And I don't want to lie
That **** scares me out
Knowing that I should be feeling either one

Have you ever felt that you don't care?
Not about the others but yourself
It's like you're just letting the water flow
Not minding if it leads you to a bay or your downfall

I feel quiet a bit adventurous
But I know these are dangerous
One wrong step would destroy me
in absolute pieces that you cannot count it

If it happens, it's okay I guess
I guess I just had to deal with the consequences
But is there even anything to fear?
I didn't even chose to live nor die, I just choose neither.

am a human tool, a drawing pencil, shedding skin cells and lead from the no. 2 pencil in my saliva

am **** and blood, skin and hair, all come-go, return re-tuned,
at their own chosen speed, gen of regeneration

am cracks and orifices, filling and emptying obediently,
to the tidings of the grieving gravity of my moon's decisions
that govern the lunatic cycle

you may kiss me with all your heart into a robust welcoming,
scorn me with spittle and deem unfit, I know the difference
and it is inconsequential

am, see me as combustible or flat, airless and empty,
as a new or a two day old birthday balloon, or an abbreviated haiku, that makes the reader gasp for the reasoning for breathing

think of me as a meme who responds to the touch of your
nippled forefinger,  but my powers are unlisted, therefore unlimited

for I am neither cyber or cypher though aesthetically they
appear as parts of my humanity, a human machine
forever reprogramming to new stimuli sensulating, such as
the temperature of your breath, the many disparate odors of you,
the curve of your eyes, the wetness of moist places

inputs that bear emergent newborn children notions in my
chested cavernous gas chambers, the bellum bellies of my brain

my digital describe in thousands of computers do hide,
but to comprehend the interacting calculations that are
my constancy and my inconsistencies, you must make a tour
if you are awake between midnight ~ dawn when from wells,
the visions, the fluids and the words are drawn

they,
the residuals of a man's ******* between
other humans, akin, and the thriving discourse between
man and gods of invisible powers,  
that offers insanity
as a viable solution, to cracking the coded human DNA,
we exchange in silence from need,
to translate ourselves
to each other

I am neither of them nor above them.
Though I do stand here looking out.

I am separate.
I am me.
As much as you can ever be you,
And I have ever been me.

For it is in this place where we become we.
The investors,
The collectors,
And the testing who test the testers.

We are us and they are them.
And yet the youth of today and tomorrow so rarely see,
That the educated and the un are all the same,
Just like you and me.

We all are people,
And to each his or her own.
We each try and find our own way to flee from it all,
Above it all.

Outward and upward.
In such a world,
And in such words as you will find here,
Is where you will always find someone like me.

Neither of nor above.
Yet ever present,
Always yearning to be free.

Trust me when I say that I would give them both to you,
So what if you would break them both kiddo.
Because that is what you did because you knew that only,
No problem with that either because I let you go.
Friends & family all so long ago warned me about this fate,
So you need not worry as I was ready to see you go.
I take all the blame because I was the one searching for a mate.