Sometimes,
When the sun gets low,
And the stars and moon don’t seem to be hanging in the sky,
Taunting me with their ability to disappear into oblivion,
It can feel almost impossible to breathe.

While I know that being unable to breathe
Because there is nothing in the darkness to light my way
Is as about impossible as it is possible for me to love you again,
It is still my reality.

I know that my heart will never be open to the possibility of
surrendering itself so completely to you once more,
Just as well as I know that this weight on my chest isn’t real,
But it doesn’t make the feeling evaporate like water on a blisteringly hot day,
Or even on a slightly too warm for a jumper day.

The harshness of my condition has been taught to me
Like a bunny has been taught to hide
When the foxes stalk it’s way.
Even more so, the cures have been preached to me since
The moment I admitted I led a tormented existence,
And yet my existence has remained tormented.

Maybe this is my moment, my completely, impossible to ignore,
Unavoidable,
Moment.
To quiet those which torment me.
Which taunt me.
Which remind me,
I will never truly escape these chains
That hold me on the starless nights.

going past the quarter of no return
feeling rather timidly
hesitatingly
full of something yet unseen
liken to smelling the baking cookies
but having to leave before the bell rings
here is always where trust comes in
has to or it all falls apart
till we begin again anew
distraction's got nothing
on this bright new filling moon

we are giddy and playful
testing our new boundaries
looking for new adventures
in old words and scenes
we are feeling so full like this
bounty is and always was eternal
we forget to check inventory
we forget about cycles
and laws and pretend
we can play Gods on Earth forever
this is our waning gibbus

we are receding
we are moving inward
to prepare for
another rebirth we are
absorbing all
we have brought forth
in abundant harvest
with the fullness
of our moon light
we are strengthening
we are gathering
all unto us
we are resting
within our Self

Do you, too, like to stare at the moon,
chandeliers and *** lights?
when your eyes feel
like they belong to a sculpture
stuck in place, tunnel vision
Do you, too, make moonlight out of street lamps,
and use dreams to feed the craving
of meaningful existence?

in a movie i loved as a kid,
the moon was seen as a sort of deity.
the man in the moon told people
who they were and what their destiny was.

of course that movie was fictional
and the characters were fake
and so was the man in the moon.

no one can tell me what my destiny is
no one can tell me who i am
or who i am going to be

in a movie i loved as a kid,
my love for the moon was born.
and still when i look up at it
i feel calm

still uncertain, still searching
but i know i don't have to do it alone
because there may not be a man in the moon
but nature will always be there
for me

You will see the light of the star you always adored at night.
One day, the moon will serve as your savior from drowning in the darkness of your own past.
And these lights will then guide you into taking the right path.

In the night I wake up 'cos
the moon's shining on my face
I see it with closed eyes
as it glides along with grace.

I move my head to dodge the glare
and try once more to fall asleep
but now I toss and turn
counting far too many sheep.

At last I drift off into slumberland
the big yellow globe has passed
over to the other window
through which it hits me in full blast.

Now I'm beside myself with rage
even feel the urge to curse
then finally it comforts me
this moon has no reverse.