I hope when you leave,
You don’t think about leaving me.
I hope we stay friends,
I hope we still have the 2 a.m talks.
I love the way you told me goodbye,
I love that you knew from day one.
I think you know me too well,
I think you see me too clearly
You’re my friend and I wish I could disappear with you.
I’m never sure if you’re smiling at me or looking just over my shoulder.
I hope you come back in April,
I hope we go on that road trip in May.
I wish I could say the things I’m too stressed to say.
I’m missing you like hell, although I’ll smile when you drive away.

I don't think I love you.
I shouldn't.
We are wrong in every way but
you are the one that took my innocence.
At first it's what I wanted.
But now, sitting here under these stars you once deflowered me under,
I realize that the greatest pain is knowing that
I wasn't the one you said goodbye to as you boarded
for England.
I lied though because the greatest pain speaks louder.
That I cannot be rid of the thoughts of you.
The sounds you made me spill
I never knew I could sing so beautifully,
and you were gorgeous when you looked at me.
Eyes so bright and kissing me as if I meant something to you.
I cannot say I love you but ****** it sure feels that way.
And these thoughts will not leave
you kissing my neck as I watch the stars dance
and we become them.
You don't think of me do you?
Not as I do, surly.
These thoughts, they'll haunt me.
You left without them.
You left me with them.

There I was alone in a room.
Nothing out of the ordinary,
Just figured that I'd hang around. Eventually find something to do.
Sometimes it's funny, the thoughts that come and go. Some better than most but nevertheless funny.
Sometimes I close my eyes and wander around in the dark.
There nothing but the patter of my heart could be heard.
Pattering through the hall of your ears,
hoping that every once in a while, you'll hear it.
Not too much to ask. Just a moment to say "hey I thought about you. "
These precious seconds we seem waste.
Here alone in two separate rooms.
The drywall felt my very essence.
A sense of sitting still while everything else goes on.
I guess at times like this you become complacent, starting to second guess everything.
The good, the bad.
Things otherwise tucked in a wall, covered by a plastic mold, a couple of screws.
Things are never as they seem.
Wood molding, a cosy semi gloss paint.
What is the true definition of balance.
The excess of things we don't really need, the convenience of dismissing things in the dark.
Things put out of view,
The shutter of a light switch clicking on, then right back off.
Here I sit tucked uncomfortably in the wall, made to fit in a plastic case.
Awaiting you to flip the switch that gave me so much life.
That one spark that truly made a difference during the day.
Would I know this familiar place without the glimpse of watching you leave back out.
This strong urge that wants to reach back out.
Even after you've switched the switch back off.
That I suppose is what makes it funny. The way switches work.
They provide a good **** general purpose, but no matter what variation. They work one way.
Always placed by a door that heads in, sometimes out.
Depending on which way you look at it.
Sometimes I just close my eyes to gain a moments peace.
Listening to the sound of you softly echo down the hall.
At some point waiting to hear them turn back around.
At that point I open my eyes, and find myself staring at a door

Tonight I looked up at the stars
With one thing in mind.
Of all the stars and constellations I didn't see the one thing I wanted to see.
The moon shone through the clouds bringing a better view.
Still I didn't see the one thing I hoped to see.
I turned to Google and downloaded one of those astrology apps.
To much dismay I still didn't see what I had built In my mind as the end all be all.
Something a bit out of the ordinary.
I stood outside a little while  longer, nothing.
It wasn't until I layed across the bed and seen my phone disconnect from the charger.
I saw I had a few missed text messages.
A call or two, a **** load of e-mails.
Still I didn't see what I built in my mind as the end all be all.
That one defining thing that would bring a smile to my face.
There was no you

I took absolutely no pleasure,
Though I indulged.
That in the pleasure of temptation.
A sense of dread setting in once all the pleasure was gone.
Hidden from which I found through true pursuit.
Isolating myself to a single thought.
I found myself unable to change, chasing the thrill of pleasure.
I thought to myself was I this selfish.
To dance in the rain soon as melancholy shown it's head.
The drops splashing against the crinkles of my face.
I soon grew to admire it.
This self perpetual motion that insists that I go in constant circles.
A unlikely comfort that insured that I pursue even further.
What was this disaster,
Finding my reflection to be more than a mere crutch.
I looked left, then right.
Losing understanding of what brought me to this place.
This certain happening.
This part of me that must die. This certain part of me that's clung on to you for so long not knowing what is real, and what isn't.
Between you and I, I had no clue which harmed me the most.
The fluorescent thought of needing you more than you needed yourself.
In actuality it was simple.
Barricading myself in a room to stop this foolish act.
Somehow you'd still managed to appear.
I'd be lying if I didn't admit that I wasn't waiting for you.
The conviction shown against my reflection waiting at the window.
Awaiting your touch before I went into a coma like sleep.
I grew resentful towards the bright light.
Choosing to sleep all day, coming to life at night.
This part of me must die.
This ache that was only quenched by your touch.
I couldn't lie to myself anymore.
Committing myself to the asylum.
By tomorrow would be too late, regretting every delusion I've made to tear myself away from you.
Your reaction once you've found out what I've truly done.
Not only did I tear myself away from you, I've made myself welcome to the touch of your everlasting dark.
Such terrifying figures the dark makes once the light cuts off.
I feared sleep as your face was the only thing I saw.
My complexion terribly pale.
Just what have you done to me, seeking some kind of justification
I checked myself in hoping to lose sight of you.
Only to find more of you in each patient.
Each day I spent in here I found my face turning more pale.
I was indeed becoming a ghoul, concerning myself with one thing.
A source of some kind of help was needed.
Finding myself arguing with the vampire girl in the lunch room over her red Jello.
The way that it skittered in slightest motion.
The way that it looked while it dripped down her fangs.
I felt like the plastic cup that held the snack filled serving.
Here I was making the biggest mistake of my life, and you were nowhere around to offer a helping hand.
I took no pleasure in removing myself from you, but at the same time
I cannot live without you

Today, I wake up feeling okay
But this feeling is not as good
As when I wake up from a nightmare
Or from an empty dream
Today, I wake up  feeling alright
But a pillow filled with tears is better than alright
I'd rather cry at night
And be wrapped by your arms
be cuddled by your warm embrace
Today, I am feeling okay
But days with you are better than today

There was a time when I sat still.
Soaking in unavoidable truth.
Choosing instead to sit and bathe in a world of thought.
The sun peeked through the window, concerned by the calmness
that struck my lips.
A sudden grip of the edge of the tub over by the sink.
A witness to this random disorder of paused lips.
Each drop of water soaked, dried with a towel.
Coming to the conclusion that I myself was naive.
That the longer I stared into this mirror,
that It wasn't my reflection that I was seeking.
It was hers all along

In most occasions all it takes is a few seconds.
A few seconds that turn into everlasting moments.
Moments we come to anticipate.
Whether it's a laugh, a moment to spend doing what we truly love.
A few seconds is all it takes.
Becoming attached at moments notice, a laughter not yet forgotten.
The excitement that spreads through each of our bones and alone
becomes the medicine that eases all pain.
It goes without saying. A few seconds is all it takes.
Most times nothing else is needed.
A silent connection of eyes refusing to look away.
The tight grip of hands not wanting to let go.
Enjoying pleasure under a seconds notice. Going on to everlasting memories.
Could you truly imagine a day where the earth itself kissed the moon.
Like literally eased a kiss on her cheek while she wasn't paying attention.
As brightly as she shines now. I bet you she'd shine brighter.
As in the seconds it takes us to define something. Over-complicating something so simple.
He truly sees her for all that she is.
In just a few seconds, a lifetime can pass by just that fast.
In most occasions we look up and wonder where the time has went.
When right along it stares us right in the face.
That's what makes it so perfect, the moment is always perfect.
To indulge in a smile, a laugh, a still moment of nothingness but bliss.
The only thing about most moments as well as a few seconds.
Is that they sometimes take forever and a day and waiting is almost if not always the most difficult thing to do.
You never get use to it, even knowing that your there