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I want this to end
please everything just stop!
I'm begging you oh! God
i can't deal with this

I want to cut myself so deep that all i  become is bone
I want to smash my head against the wall
make paintings with my blood
PLEASE STOP!

You tell me that you're concerned
but then why do you ignore me
like a pig on a street
is that what you think of me?

I'm done trying
My legs broken from carrying this pain
my windpipe punctured by the comments you make
My skin crimson form the cuts i create

I get hooked with a therapist
but instead of help ,all they blab is *******
that makes me question to my broken core
Am I going mad?

Can you ******* shut up
all i want is to be alone
all i want to be is held
by someone who loves me unconditionally

you say your love is pure
but is it? you manipulate me
I love you, but do you love me?
You made me question everything

Your ******* homophobic mindset,
its so revolting , I feel ashamed to be your son
You say no matter what happpens you are my son
but the very next second you spill your guts

I'm sorry i disappoint you constantly
I'm sorry, I bleed
I'm sorry, I'm weak
I'm sorry, would you ever forgive me?
A rage poem , A desperate cry for help. This is written in a mooment of intense emotion and a form of self expression and NOT A THREAT
Rain Apr 23
Life feels too heavy.
Too many worries.
Too many pressures.
Too many responsibilities.
Too many hardships.
Pain.
Despair.
Hope turns to despair.
Happiness turns to numbness.
Calmness turns to pain.

Too fast.
So bleed.
Bleed.
Bleed.
Till everything is silent.
But it’s not silent.
It’s not working.
Making me panic.
Why isn’t it working?
Rain Apr 23
Lines marked so neatly
Parallel to each other
On my leg horizontally
Each of them redder

Like pencils lined up
Neatly in a row.
Without any breakup
All perfectly so

Some are faded
Some fresher
Some lighter
And some harsher

Drawn carefully
To bleed and stain
Makes me have safety
To feel the pain
yıldız Apr 15
In the still of night, a plan took flight,
Like doves in the sky, so pure and bright.
But shadows whispered of danger near,
God saw the path and drew you near.

With gentle wings, He changed the way,
Protecting your heart, come what may.
So let the doves fly, unburdened and true,
For what was meant to harm you, God turned into good.
Damocles Apr 7
Mind on the brink,
Sunk thoughts in a blink
Who’s there?………
                            ….Where are you?….
….What?…
                                                    …no..

Scotty didn’t know,
What brother did in tow,
How greasy hands touch upon the innocent
A daughter doesn’t tell,
The scars they never show.

Scotty doesn’t know
Wife got out the papers,
The lawyer signed and notarized
Waiting for the right time
Manilla envelope creased with sweaty hand prints.

Scotty was fond of rope,
But could never buy a vowel,
Clues left him clueless to the truth
The pills make him expel the bowels.

Scotty doesn’t know,
The voices aren’t real,
Brother looks like a nephilim
Wings made of goose down and paper meal
He’s dancing upon the tree tops
Trying to write the words,
Striking out as the swing tightens.

Scotty was playing hangman,
Tire rope swing, swung
Saying goodbye to the demons
Voices that ring his bells rung
How his brother never loved him,
Only the fruits of his own creation,
And with her lost innocence premeditated
He offered to solve the puzzle,
Eyes dilated.
Based on a tragic true srtory, it is a work of fiction but based on actual events of someone I used to know.
Dae Apr 5
Your voice, so smooth it tickled my ears
Come into me like you once did, and I would swallow you whole.
Come into myself like I never did and I could stay afloat.
My heart endured just to be sure
That I made the right choice, the wrong one, or no one
No one compares to your charms
You who let me lose myself in your arms
You who took me away from my day to day but distrust still creeped.
No one compares to the havoc you wreaked.

One year I chased you. The next, you chased me.
The last, we ran in circles until I was alone, lamenting your company.
Then you reappeared, different as I was, I wanted you all the same.
Then I left but we stayed enmeshed, sharing love between the pain.
Things began to turn when you grew tired of the distance,
Maybe, just maybe, maybe there’s more we insisted
Until you said you don’t love me like before,
nothing left but memories so sore.

What feels strong and voiceful flows out like garbled whispers,
Like when I asked you to choke me, and I faded with radio static tongue twisters.
Then awoke to your warm hand tapping my face,
eyes staring into me, mouth agape.
If we could meander so many years through storms and drought,
then I can swim through my own stream of doubt
that I will ever find another.
Slugish Apr 2
Again
I’d do it all again.
Drag the blade across my wrist
Watch the blood seep into the white sheets
It dosent hurt
It’s a high
An addiction
.
It’s been a year
I’m better
Please don’t take it away
I don’t know what to do with my emotions
I’ve been educated in things I shouldn’t since I was 10
But don’t take this
I need this
I can’t handle it
I’d do it
Again & Again
Again & Again
Again & Again
It won’t get too bad
Right
Self harm is no joke. Take this seriously. Mental health is no joke. Emotions are not jokes.
Don’t express them without being diagnosed or dealing with self harm
Maria Apr 1
The wagon rode, laden with dreams,
Of clear happiness and fairy love.
His path was hilly, full of trees.
But he rode brightly inspite of.

The wagon rode and galloped slowly
Without any troubles and fears.
The sun shined to him tenderly
And forest gave him pure cheers.

The wagon rode and breathed a peace.
He went so breezily and calm.
It seemed that nobody again,
Never and never do him harm.

The wagon rode on tiny rocks.
And now he have to started home.
His home is sunless and no cheers.
His home is gloomy catacomb.
This poem came in response to the scene with the beggarly young man I witnessed today.
Thank you for reading it! 🙏
Slugish Mar 28
I want you to see me now.
I got better
They didn’t leave scars
My arms are fine
I wish you were here
You’re what kept me together
And I want to thank you
But
Where’d you go?
Oh
It’s a year
Please come back
Please
I’m better I promise
I even threw the letters away
I found new hobbies
I found you
I found what I needed
Please come back
I can’t do this
Please
I’m begging you..
I’ve been clean a year now
(Feb 2024- March 2025)
Kat M Mar 25
Do you know what it’s like
To be caged by your brain
A place supposed to be free
To be who you are
Graced with heaven or hell
To be changed by so little
Torment yourself wholly
To be what is right
It doesn't stop at your mind
To be in rambling circles
        Losing your breath
        To be at the mercy of fear
        Shaking ever so carefully
To be seen merely as cold
Digging into Earth you call skin
To be laced with liquid iron
Feedback Welcome!
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